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The Seattle Garages are a Blaseball team in the Chaotic division of the Evil League. They have been a part of Internet League Blaseball since Season 1. The Garages have formerly played in the Chaotic division of the Evil League (Seasons 1-5) and the High Division of Mild League (Seasons 6-24).

Roster

Lineup Rotation
  • None
  • None
Shadows
  • None

Select Tlopps player cards can be found here.

Player History

For a list of all former players, see Category:Former Seattle Garages Players.

Beta History

Beta Player History

Date Removed Added Cause
Toggle Intrateam Moves (Fax, Voicemail, etc.) and Shadows Recruitment
β01 00 Malik Destiny 🎸 Original Player
β01 00 Theodore Duende 🎸 Original Player
β01 00 Avila Guzman 🎸 Original Player
β01 00 Luis Acevedo 🎸 Original Player
β01 00 Shaquille Torres 🎸 Original Player
β01 00 Lang Richardson 🎸 Original Player
β01 00 Oliver Mueller 🎸 Original Player
β01 00 Allison Abbott 🎸 Original Player
β01 00 Bennett Browning 🎸 Original Player
β01 00 Mike Townsend 🎸 Original Player
β01 00 Tot Clark 🎸 Original Player
β01 00 Arturo Huerta 🎸 Original Player
β01 00 Ron Monstera 🎸 Original Player
β01 00 Jaylen Hotdogfingers 🎸 Original Player
β01 EL Jaylen Hotdogfingers Derrick Krueger 🎸 Incineration Opening the Forbidden Book
β03 04 Bennett Browning Tiana Cash 🎸 Incineration
β03 47 Tiana Cash Greer Gwiffin 🎸 Incineration
β03 74 Shaquille Torres Cedric Spliff 🎸 Incineration
β03 80 Derrick Krueger Henry Marshallow 🎸 Incineration
β04 36 Avila Guzman Farrell Seagull 🚤 Feedback
β06 EL Mike Townsend Jaylen Hotdogfingers Blessing 🎸 Lottery Pick
β07 EL Luis Acevedo Oliver Notarobot 🦀 Blessing 🎸 Blind Date
β08 21 Lang Richardson Nolanestophia Patterson 🥧 Feedback
β08 42 Cedric Spliff Quack Enjoyable 🗣️ Feedback
β08 56 Allison Abbott Paula Mason 🥩 Feedback
β08 71 Paula Mason Paula Turnip 🐅 Feedback
β08 102 Farrell Seagull Summers Pony 🥧 Feedback
β08 EL Ron Monstera Durham Spaceman 🎸 Blessing 🎸 New Kid
β08 EL Lori Boston 🎸 Blessing 🎸 Promo Code
β08 EL Chorby Short Terrell Bradley Blessing Lottery Pick
β09 07 Jaylen Hotdogfingers Betsy Trombone 🥧 Feedback
β09 21 Henry Marshallow Jaylen Hotdogfingers 🥧 Feedback
β09 53 Jaylen Hotdogfingers Ortiz Morse 🗣️ Feedback
β10 EL Pitching Machine 🥜 Tiding Fell from THE SHELLED ONE'S PODS
β12 EL Greer Gwiffin Nagomi Mcdaniel 🏝️ Will 🎸 Plunder
β12 EL Nagomi Mcdaniel Alaynabella Hollywood 🌹 Will 🌹 Exchange
β12 EL Pitching Machine Mindy Kugel 🐌 Will 🐌 Exchange
β13 64 Mindy Kugel Jaylen Hotdogfingers 🛠️ Feedback
β13 EL Paula Turnip Carmelo Plums 🐅 Will 🐅 Exchange
β13 EL Goodwin Morin Lotus Mango 🏋️‍ Will 🏋️‍ Exchange
β13 EL Magi Ruiz 🎸 Blessing 🎸 Stow Away
β14 LS Wyatt Mason X 🎸 Psychoacoustics
β14 EL Arturo Huerta Chorby Soul Will 🎸 Plunder
β15 EL Chorby Soul Penelope Mathews 📱 Will 📱 Plunder
β15 EL Jaylen Hotdogfingers Conditional Yuniesky 👟 Will 👟 Plunder
β15 EL Jaylen Hotdogfingers 👟 Will 🎸 Move
β16 32 Oliver Loofah Howell Franklin 👟 Feedback
β16 EL Lenny Marijuana Hiroto Wilcox 🐅 Will 🐅 Equivalent Exchange
β16 EL Carmelo Plums York Silk 🗣️ Will 🎸 Plunder
β17 15 Jaylen Hotdogfingers Fitzgerald Wanderlust 👟 Feedback
β17 99 York Silk →  Vault 🏅 Preserved
β17 EL Hiroto Wilcox Lenny Marijuana 🐅 Will 🐅 Equivalent Exchange
β17 EL Howell Franklin Brisket Friendo 🌞 Will 🌞 Equivalent Exchange
β18 EL Quack Enjoyable Avila Guzman 🌞 Will 🎸 Equivalent Exchange
β19 91 Avila Guzman Aldon Cashmoney IV 🦀 Feedback
β19 104 Sparks Beans Lenjamin Zhuge 🎸 Incineration
β19 EL Aldon Cashmoney IV →  Vault 🏅 Dusted
β20 EL Terrell Bradley Oliver Loofah 👟 Will 🎸 Equivalent Exchange
β22 63 Kathy Mathews 🌹 Super Roamin' The Fifth Base
β22 LS Uncle Plasma VI 🏅 Gift Shop
β22 LS Liquid Friend VI 🏅 Gift Shop
β22 EL Fairwood Patchwork Michelle Sportsman 🦀 Will 🍬 Equivalent Exchange
β22 EL Lotus Mango →  Philly Pies 🥧 Blessing 🥧 Under Taker
β22 EL Liquid Friend VI →  Vault 🏅 Dusted
β22 EL Uncle Plasma VI →  Vault 🏅 Dusted
β23 117 Castillo Turner →  Rising Stars 💫 Drafted ILB Semi-Centennial
β23 117 James Nolan 💫 Cut Fell From Rising Stars
β23 117 Abner Pothos 💫 Cut Fell From Rising Stars
β23 117 Castillo Turner 💫 Cut Fell From Rising Stars
β24 06 Tot Clark Marion Shriffle 🎸 Incineration
β24 09 Castillo Turner →  Hawai'i Fridays 🏝️ Super Roamin' The Fifth Base
β24 18 Parker MacMillan 🥧 Super Roamin'
β24 20 Oliver Mueller 🎸 Redacted
β24 21 Mike Townsend 🎸 Redacted
β24 27 Parker MacMillan →  Philly Pies 🥧 Super Roamin'
β24 36 Parker MacMillan 🥧 Super Roamin'
β24 45 Parker MacMillan →  Hades Tigers 🐅 Super Roamin'
β24 81 Parker MacMillan 🌟 Super Roamin'
β24 90 Parker MacMillan →  Hades Tigers 🐅 Super Roamin'

NEW Player History

Date Removed Added Cause
FB 01 Henry Marshallow 🥧 Fall Ball
FB 02 Timmy Vine 📱 Fall Ball
FB 03 Chambers Simmons 🌹 Fall Ball
FB 04 Jesús Rodriguez 🥧 Fall Ball
FB 05 Baby Triumphant 🔥 Fall Ball
FB 06 Rivers Clembons 🚤 Fall Ball
FB 07 Brisket Friendo 🎸 Fall Ball
FB 08 Sheev Shriffle 🥧 Fall Ball
FB 09 Hendricks Richardson 🌮 Fall Ball
FB 10 Seren Moss 🌮 Fall Ball
01 01 Mindy Rahman 🎸 NEW Original Player
01 01 Deion Gamage 🎸 NEW Original Player
01 01 Susan Witherspoon 🎸 NEW Original Player
01 01 Josephine Aster 🎸 NEW Original Player
01 03 Jasper Destiny 🌹 Horizon (weather)
01 19 Rigby Friedrich 🔱 Horizon (weather)
01 67 Chandra Blortles 🌹 Horizon (weather)
02 34 Jenkins Ingram 💋 Can't Lose
02 35 Jenkins Ingram San Francisco Lovers 💋 Can't Lose
02 36 Jenkins Ingram 💋 Can't Lose
02 37 Jenkins Ingram Boston Flowers 🌹 Can't Lose
02 38 Jenkins Ingram 🌹 Can't Lose
02 42 Jenkins Ingram Chicago Firefighters 🔥 Can't Lose
02 43 Jenkins Ingram 🔥 Can't Lose
02 44 Jenkins Ingram Chicago Firefighters 🔥 Can't Lose
02 45 Jenkins Ingram 🔥 Can't Lose
02 48 Jenkins Ingram Chicago Firefighters 🔥 Can't Lose
02 50 Chambers Simmons → Shadows 🎸 Knighted
02 54 Pedro Davids 🦀 Horizon (weather)

The New Era

Date Removed Added Cause
FB 01 Henry Marshallow 🥧 Fall Ball
FB 02 Timmy Vine 📱 Fall Ball
FB 03 Chambers Simmons 🌹 Fall Ball
FB 04 Jesús Rodriguez 🥧 Fall Ball
FB 05 Baby Triumphant 🔥 Fall Ball
FB 06 Rivers Clembons 🚤 Fall Ball

Season Results

For more detailed Season Results, check out the Seattle Garages' Seasons Results Hub.

Season Record Win % Place in Division Season Notes
1 43-56 .434 5th The Forbidden Book was opened after this season, resulting in the incineration of Jaylen Hotdogfingers
2 46-53 .464 4th
3 48-51 .485 4th
4 49-50 .495 3rd
5 52-47 .525 3rd
6 53-46 .535 3rd In the Seattle Garages' first playoff appearance, the team swept the Philly Pies and the Hades Tigers before being swept in the Internet Series by the Baltimore Crabs.
7 55-44 .556 2nd Beat the Charleston Shoe Thieves, then lost to the Mexico City Mild Wings 1-3 in the Mild League Championship Series.
8 65-34 .657 1st Swept by the Philly Pies in the Mild League Divisional Series.
9 60-39 .606 1st Beat the Philly Pies, then lost to the Charleston Shoe Thieves 1-3 in the Mild League Championship Series.
10 47-52 .475 3rd
11 55-46 .545 1st Beat the Charleston Shoe Thieves and Yellowstone Magic, before losing to the Hellmouth Sunbeams 1-3 in the Internet Series.

*Season 1 is missing the results of Day 98 and 99's games. Blaseball has been lost.

In the Season 6 Elections, the Garages won the Lottery Pick and Fireproof Jacket blessings. Lottery Pick brought back deceased star Jaylen Hotdogfingers, and sent Mike Townsend to The Shadows. Fireproof Jacket targeted Oliver Mueller.

In the Season 7 Elections, the Garages won the Blind Date blessing, trading Luis Acevedo to the Baltimore Crabs for Oliver Notarobot.

In the Season 8 Elections, the Garages won the Forever Physical, Promo Code, Home Field Advantage, and New Kid blessings. Ron Monstera was the target of Forever Physical and New Kid, the latter of which replaced them with Durham Spaceman. Promo Code recruited new pitcher Lori Boston.

In the Season 9 Elections, the Garages won the Secret Weapon, Out of Sight, and Hot Sauce Bar blessings. They were subjected to the Fifth Base and Targeted Shame. Out of Sight brought Mike Townsend and Lenny Marijuana to the rotation, replacing Ortiz Morse and Lori Boston. Out of Sight also brought Sparks Beans onto the lineup, replacing Nolanestophia Patterson. Secret Weapon targeted Shadows pitcher Goodwin Morin. Hot Sauce Bar targeted Theodore Duende.

In the Season 10 Elections, the Garages won the Dark Star blessing, recruiting Goodwin Morin to the rotation, and sending Mike Townsend to The Shadows.

In the Season 11 elections, the Garages were assigned the Arcana VIII Justice.

In the Season 12 elections, the Garages received the Infuse will, increasing the stats of Betsy Trombone, and the Plunder will, trading Greer Gwiffin for Nagomi Mcdaniel. Mcdaniel was then immediately traded again for Alaynabella Hollywood via the Boston Flowers' Exchange will. Finally, the The Best Defense blessing turned Goodwin Morin into a batter in exchange for Hollywood becoming a pitcher.

In the Season 13 elections, the Garages received the Infuse will, increasing the stats of Alaynabella Hollywood, and the Foreshadow will, shadowing Jaylen Hotdogfingers for Nolanestophia Patterson. They also received the Stow Away blessing, adding Magi Ruiz to their pitching rotation. The Garages were targeted by the Hades Tigers' Exchange will, trading Paula Turnip for Carmelo Plums, and the Tokyo Lift's Exchange, trading Goodwin Morin for Lotus Mango.

During the Season 14 elections, the Garages received the Infuse will, increasing the stats of Malik Destiny; the Foreshadow will, shadowing Summers Pony for Oliver Loofah; and the Plunder will, reviving Chorby Soul and sending Arturo Huerta to the Shadows. They also received the Min-Max blessing, making Wyatt Mason X a Maximalist and Oliver Loofah a Minimalist, and doing the same for players on each other team in Mild High.

During the Season 15 elections, the Garages were affected by the New York Millennials' Plunder will, trading away Chorby Soul for Penelope Mathews, and the Charleston Shoe Thieves' Plunder will, trading away Jaylen Hotdogfingers for Conditional Yuniesky between the teams' Shadows. The Garages themselves received the Reform will, replacing Chorby Soul's Debt modification with Unstable; the Enrich will, gaining the Life of the Party modification for the following season; and the Move will, stealing back Jaylen Hotdogfingers to their rotation. They also received the Shadow Running Practice blessing, boosting the Baserunning of all players in their Shadows.

During the Season 16 elections, the Garages were affected by the Hades Tigers' Equivalent Exchange will, trading away Lenny Marijuana for Hiroto Wilcox. The Garages themselves received the Plunder will, stealing York Silk from the Canada Moist Talkers in exchange for Carmelo Plums; the Foreshadow will, sending Alaynabella Hollywood to the Shadows in exchange for Mike Townsend, and the Move will, moving Hollywood to their lineup. They also won the Handcrafted Bat Drop blesssing, granting Quack Enjoyable a Sharp Bat, and the Shadow Pitching Practice and Shadow Defense Practice blessings, boosting the appropriate stats for all players in their Shadows.

During the Season 17 elections, the Garages were affected by the Hades Tigers' Equivalent Exchange will, trading Hiroto Wilcox back again for Lenny Marijuana, and the Hellmouth Sunbeams' Equivalent Exchange will, trading away Howell Franklin for Brisket Friendo. The Garages themselves received the Reform will, replacing Jaylen Hotdogfingers's Fliickerrriiing modification with Super Idol, and the Move will, moving Fitzgerald Wanderlust] to the Shadows. The Garages also won the Handcrafted Jersey Drop blessing, giving Theodore Duende a Traveling Head Jersey, and the In a Pinch blessing, moving Arturo Huerta from the Shadows to the lineup.

During the Season 18 elections, the Garages received the Move will, sending Theodore Duende to the Shadows; the Equivalent Exchange will, trading Quack Enjoyable to the Hellmouth Sunbeams for Avila Guzman, and the Alternate Trust will, rerolling Brisket Friendo and making them Negative. The Garages also won the Shadow of the Bats blessing, boosting the batting of all players in their Shadows, and the Class Act blessing, granting them Shame Donor for the next season.

Team Overview

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

For a more in-depth look at the team, see Seattle Garages/History.

The Garages play their home games at Hotdogfingers Memorial Climate Pledge Garage and Parking Facility, also known as the Big Garage, which is located inside an aircraft hangar, a garage for planes.

The Garages are also a musical supergroup known by several names and composed of members of the best bands in the Seattle blunge scene. The team plays exclusively against teams that happen to be in the same city as their Eternal Tour, which lines up perfectly with their League-mandated schedule.

They are also an anarcho-syndicalist collective.

Staff

Coaches

The Seattle Garages have no coach and instead communally coach each other.

Mascots

Main Page: United Seattle Garages Mascot Workers.

Garages management initially pitched Jerry the Car as a mascot for the team. However, following massive fan outcry, Seattle Garages management tasked its active player roster with the creation of a new mascot. Unable to agree on one of fourteen pitches from every member of the team, it was agreed to let all players have their own mascot as a short-term solution. Following the incineration of Jaylen Hotdogfingers, mascots, players and teams agreed on a formal process of representation on a permanent basis, honoring Jaylen's mascot Connie the Cone, and allowing new player Derrick Kruger to add his own mascot, Casey Cat Tree.

The United Seattle Garages Mascot Workers were founded shortly before Season 2, and were declared the official mascot of the Seattle Garages in a ceremony before their first home game.

Commentary

Garages live commentary is provided by Mama Duende, who also provides orange slices and juice boxes for the team at the end of each game. Despite her name, Mama Duende bears no relation to Theodore Duende. She is very nice.

Fan Culture

For a more in-depth look at fan culture, see Seattle Garages/Fan Culture.

The Garages have a die-hard fan base known as "the Band". Many fans are known to camp out in the stands for weeks or even months on end, enjoying games and concerts 24/7.

Common Chants

  • "PARK IT!"
  • "PLUG THE BANDS!" (followed by everyone shouting out names of local independent bands)
  • "TOWNSEND!" (exasperatedly, for pitcher Mike Townsend)
  • "NAIL BAT" (a commonly used chant for batter Allison Abbott)

Fan Art

See Generalized Seattle Garages fan art here. See player specific fan art on their individual wiki.