Paula Mason

From Blaseball Wiki

Paula Mason was player in the Shadows for the Houston Spies, and was with the team from the Season β20 elections until Fall Ball. Mason has previously played for the Chicago Firefighters, Dallas Steaks, Seattle Garages, and Hades Tigers.

Official League Records

Mason joined the ILB as a lineup player for the Chicago Firefighters after the incineration of Tyreek Olive on Season β2, Day 24.

On Season β3, Day 20, Mason swallowed a peanut and had an allergic reaction, resulting in a combined 11.1 6.2 stat decrease.

During the Season β3 elections, Mason received a combined 6.2 11.3 stat increase as a result of the Firefighters' Team-Building Exercise and Performance Enhancing Demons blessings.

On Season β4, Day 4, Mason was exchanged to the Dallas Steaks due to Feedback. Mason was replaced by Thomas Kirby.

On Season β8, Day 56, Mason was exchanged to the Seattle Garages due to Feedback. Mason was replaced by Allison Abbott. On Day 71, Mason was again exchanged to the Hades Tigers due to Feedback. Mason was replaced by Paula Turnip.

During the Season β9 election, Mason received the Fire Eater modification due to the passing of the Forecast: Eclipse decree.

After the Tigers' championship victory in Season β12, Mason Evolved to Base 1, preventing any of their star ratings from being reduced to below .

During the Season β15 elections, Mason's baserunning increased from 3.6 4.1 as a result of the Tigers' Triple Crown blessing.

During the Season β20 elections, Mason was traded to the Houston Spies in exchange for Dudley Mueller as a result of the Tigers' Equivalent Exchange Will.

During the Season β22 elections, Mason gained the Skipping and Subtractor modifications as a result of the Record Scratch and Subtractor Avoidance blessings.

On Season β24, Day 79, Mason retreated to the Spies' Shadows in exchange for Mohammed Picklestein due to Night.

The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.


Career in Chicago

Formerly the in-house splortscaster for the Firefighters, Mason has witnessed all the greatest triumphs and failures in Firefighter history. She started her career with the Firefighters while reporting on the Great Chicago Blaseball Fire as the first on the scene to interview the newly formed team.

Mason has seen and reported on many an incineration, most notable among them being that of previous leadoff hitter Tyreek Olive, who was incinerated on Season 2, Day 24 of The Discipline Era during a regular season game against the Los Angeles Tacos. Upon seeing Olive's bat hit the mound with no one left to wield it, Mason famously stood from her splortscaster seat, descended a fire pole, and took up the bat with a determination that left many fans in the stadium shocked into silence.

Mason is from Chicago. Her jersey number during her time with the Chicago Firefighters was 773.

After the third season, Paula Mason woke in their bedroom and went to the mirror, being confronted with an unfamiliar but calming spark in their eyes, and the knowledge that violence lived in their heart now. Mason had become one of the three players on the Firefighters to receive a fragment of Landry Violence's spirit, and gained significant new strength.

Paula "The Pallbearer of Violence" Mason was now more powerful than ever.

Career in Dallas

Over Mason's career as a splortscaster in Chicago, she frequently traveled to Dallas to call the Firefighters' road games there. While there, she developed a love for the local fast food franchise Wlhatablurger, and would often advertise for them during away games in Dallas, having made a deal with its Chicago-based ownership. Mason was renowned for being one of only three people who can accurately pronounce the restaurant's name, and could often be seen after her games in Dallas enjoying a patty melt and milkshake, both as a splortscaster and as a player for the Firefighters.

During Day 4 of Season 4, as the Steaks came to Chicago for a series against the Firefighters, Mason found herself daydreaming about enjoying another Wlhatablurger meal next time she made the trip down to Dallas. As she did, a screech of feedback reverberated throughout the Fire House. In an instant, Mason was in a Steaks uniform, and began playing against her former team.

While Mason is from Chicago, her heart is in Dallas now. Steaks fans can redeem their ticket stubs for a free milkshake at participating Wlhatablurger locations whenever Mason hits a home run during a game thanks to their "Mason Milkshake" promotion, and fans frequently spot Mason herself dining at the restaurant after big wins.

Career in Seattle

Mason had a brief but eventful tenure batting for the Seattle Garages in Season 8. During a Steaks/Garages series Mason received a bean ball from Jaylen Hotdogfingers and was afflicted with Flickering. Feedback struck the very next game, swapping Mason with Seattle icon Allison Abbott. Amid the shock and dismay of fans on both sides, Mason took the change in stride and proceeded to hit a 3-run homer. Practically overnight she established herself as Seattle's new heavy hitter before another Feedback swap sent her to the Hades Tigers on day 71.

At a time when both Seattle players and fans were reeling from "Nail Bat" Abbott's sudden departure, Mason's cool confidence and no-nonsense performance on the field brought some much needed stability. The band warmed quickly to Paula "Bandma" Mason, whom Oliver Mueller described in one post-game interview as "pretty damn punk rock for an old lady."

Though lacking any prior instrumental training, her years of experience as an announcer were considered strong indication of talent as a vocalist. With her new teammates enthusiastically asking about her musical tastes, Mason admitted to being an avid follower of heavy metal since the genre's earliest inception. The band was enthralled and soon agreed that they wanted her to headline their next major release.

Unfortunately, Mason's transfer to the Hades Tigers cut short plans for the creation of a Garages Heavy Metal concept album/rock opera. Rumors of a studio session demo tape continue to circulate among fans, but no official release has been announced. When pressed for comment, Garages pitcher Tot Clark said:

I can't really give many details. Everything was early in development when Bandma Mason left for the Tigers. I will say this: I've seen a lot of wild stuff in my time, but hearing Bandma sing metal… the memory still makes my blood run cold. Metaphorically, I mean.

Career in Hades

After a quick trip back to Seattle to pick up her things and a motorcycle ride to Hades via US Highway 191, Mason spent the last portion of Season 8 in Hades finding her way as a Tiger. The team recognized the portion of Landry Violence’s spirit she had received while she was a Firefighter, and valued her impressive ability to bat, draw walks, and of course, steal bases.

While in Seattle, Mason became known for her strong convictions in regards to "smashing the patriarchy." Since joining the Tigers, her attitude has been accentuated by the labrys she can often be found wielding both off and on the field. (Some observers credit the intimidation factor it offers for her ability to draw walks.) The axe is rumored to have been a gift from Persephone herself upon Mason's arrival in Hades.

Mason moved into Paula Turnip's former lodgings at the Home Plate, and has become a close friend of Mummy Melcon and the resident "cool auntie" to the younger residents. She has continued to play guitar, and has somehow found a way to channel energy into her amp from the lightning above Sixth Circle Stadium. There are reports that when she is on a roll with her guitar, the lightning strikes in time with her music.

Mason has stated she respects Peanutiel Duffy as an excellent hitter but keeps her distance from him due to her peanut allergy. Her feelings regarding the newest Tiger, Aldon Cashmoney, are more mixed. She appreciates vim giving her more opportunities to improve her baserunning, but also harbors doubts about how anticapitalist and antipatriarchal ve is.

Renewed Firefighting

Having grown distant from her Chicago roots, Mason found the connection rekindled by Dunlap Figueroa, who had Feedbacked to the Firefighters and subsequently returned to Hades via Wills. Figueroa, bearing a gift from the Firefighters in the form of Mason's old jacket, was enthusiastic about completing kyr training, and encouraged Mason to recertify. Filled with fond memories, Mason paid a surprise visit to Chicago with Figueroa in order to renew her certification as a Firefighter and spend time with her old teammates, striding back into the Firehouse with labrys in hand and jacket in place. During this visit, Mason met Gita Sparrow, the rookie player who had inherited her old number, and struck up a rapport. Perhaps it's okay to look back, just a little.

Fan Works