Tot Clark

From Blaseball Wiki

Tot Clark was a lineup player for the Seattle Garages, and was with the team from Season 1 until being incinerated on Season 24, Day 6.

Official League Records

Clark joined the ILB as a pitcher for the Seattle Garages with the Return of Blaseball.

Along with Ron Monstera, Clark was the highest-rated pitcher in the Garages rotation from the Season 1 elections until Jaylen Hotdogfingers returned.

During the Coffee Cup, Clark played for FWXBC as a lineup player.

On Season 19, Day 10, Clark retreated to the Garages' Shadows in exchange for Terrell Bradley via The Hotdogfingers Memorial Climate Pledge Garage and Parking Facility's Fax Machine. On Day 16, Clark rejoined the Garages' active roster in exchange for Magi Ruiz via The Hotdogfingers Memorial Climate Pledge Garage and Parking Facility's Fax Machine.

During the Season 20 elections, Clark became a lineup player in exchange for Arturo Huerta as a result of the Garages' Roster Swap will.

On Season 24, Day 6, Clark was incinerated and replaced by Marion Shriffle.

Personal Life

The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Tot "King Tot" Clark was allegedly next in line for the throne when the Egyptian pharaoh Tutankhamun died circa 1325 BC. Not wanting to rule, Clark faked his own mummification. This made him a pariah among the royal family to such an extent that Clark was subsequently erased from the records of the era. Clark continues to wear his mummification bandages to this day because he "thought [he] looked hot."

Clark is in a relationship with former teammate Luis Acevedo and visited them often during downtime before the Baltimore Crabs ascension.

Alleged Immortality

Clark's uncanny resemblance to Tutankhamun, history-spanning anecdotes, and occasional lack of focus on the mound due to "daydreaming about [his] many travels" have led to speculation that Clark is immortal. Some consider this to be supported by documents recently discovered by investigative reporters Wolf Mully and Lana Sculder recording the marriage between a museum supplier by the name of Alonsius Clark and the minor Prussian noble in service to Napoleon by the name of Tot N. Kahrman in the winter of 1801.

Personal Life:

While many of the Garages lead boisterous, larger than life lives, Clark has been known to eschew much of this, outside of the odd advertising campaign for the Garages, instead leading what appears to be a reasonably reserved and quiet life out of the spotlight with his partner Luis Acevedo. Since the batters feedback to the crabs and subsequent ascension, however, Clark has become more reclusive, and his appearance at games became notably more disheveled. Talking to both team mates and workers around the Hangar, it was discovered by sports reporters that since season 11, Clark has asked fellow player Arturo Huerta for help applying his bandages, though they are unsure why specifically it was Huerta and not anyone else.

During the siesta, Clark took to hanging out with teammate Oliver Notarobot, the two bonding over the loss of the crabs. Notarobot has notably helped him open up and take down some of his walls, whereas Clark has helped Notarobot branch out his musical genres.

Strike on the Mound

During the bottom of the 10th inning of Season 6, Day 109 (game two of the Internet Series) versus the Baltimore Crabs the Garages were shamed when Kennedy Loser and Oliver Notarobot both batted in runs. Clark, with two outs left in the game and having just thrown a second strike to Sutton Dreamy, decided to stand on the mound and not pitch for four minutes as a sign of protest against the blaseball gods. This has colloquially been known as "Tot's Strike on the Mound" ever since. When asked about it after the match Clark simply said, "Well, you can't lose if you don't pitch right? Sometimes defying the gods is just standing around and doing nothing for a few minutes."

Box of Tot Clark Files

Dust billows as the file box lands on the table. While many archives in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill are unified in some way, this... definitely isn’t one of them. The accompanying Rumor Registry explains all of the contents... wherever it is... but for now you grab the folder labelled IF-74.602 and start reading...

Tot Clark has been seen several times throughout the past thousands of years; people matching hir description have been noted in interviews or identified, after the invention of them, in photographs stretching the course of decades. Throughout this time, hir appearance has not changed much besides the style of clothing shifting to match the time. The origin of hir immortality is unknown, supposedly even to hir.

One mostly-constant is Clark’s wearing of bandages, which has been explained by them as a “comfort” and “because of sensory issues” to hir teammates. Ze cited former teammate and long-time partner Luis Acevedo with helping hir put them on, and when asked who did it while the Baltimore Crabs ascended, ze struggled to answer before simply shrugging.

Another constant in history regarding Clark is hir formerly mentioned partner, Luis Acevedo. Most photographs documented include both of them, and Clark’s stories regarding hir past often involve Acevedo as well. Since Acevedo’s trade to the Baltimore Crabs, ze’s been seen often in Baltimore, using the long Garages pitching rotation schedule to hir full advantage. Records show that when Acevedo was traded to the Worms for a season, Clark co-signed for ownership of a house in Ohio. These records have since mysteriously gone missing.

Coffee Cup and Siesta

Clark was a lineup player for the FWXBC during the Coffee Cup, and cited hir ability to bat to practice with Malik Destiny and Acevedo during the occasional Garages practice. When Clark hit a single or walked to first, some Crabs fans in the stands yelled “eye of light, future sight,” Acevedo’s chant, in memory of them. When asked about this, ze said that ze “[appreciated] it, although it [was] a little too loud.”

It is rumoured that before every game against the Pandemonium Artists, Clark got into fights with Pandemonium player Haunt Wednesday, fulfilling hir pregame ritual and confirming the theory that ghosts do, in fact, have bones.

After the Coffee Cup, Clark’s appearances in public lowered to a near-never frequency. However, most of hir teammates say that they saw hir at some point or another; one Jaylen Hotdogfingers claimed that “it isn’t hir fault you’re all incompetent, ze’s not exactly subtle.” The validity of this statement has yet to be confirmed.

Most of Clark’s documented appearances were at the telescope to Up, accompanying fellow teammate Oliver Notarobot. It is speculated that the two had gotten closer in the loss of their loved one(s) to Ascension, although neither of them have made a statement on it.

Post Season 12

After the Crabs came down from Ascension in Season 12, Tot Clark was once again seen making full use of the almost entire week ze got between pitching games to spend time with hir partner in Baltimore. This time spent in the city of Carcinization led to hir gaining an interest in the transformation, eventually growing partial chitin armor, centralized around hir forearms and shoulders. It does not appear to interfere with the bandages, and when asked if this bothered hir in any way, ze said that it “helped a lot, actually. It’s nice. The Big Garage kind of looks at me weird now. Do I smell like Crab?”

Acevedo has expressed both amusement and happiness at the concept that their husband now matches them.

When the Grind Rail was installed in various stadiums, Clark expressed disappointment at not being able to skate on it. Eventually, Oliver Mueller was seen taking hir to the Big Garage after dark, and teaching hir how to skateboard on the rail despite there being no practical use for it.


Clark is the bass player for the Seattle Garages Vibration Exaltation. He played third bass in short-lived all-bass supergroup Basses Loaded.

Fan Works


Tot Clark is the focus of the following songs:

Additionally, Tot Clark is mentioned in the following songs: