Montgomery Bullock

From Blaseball Wiki

Montgomery Bullock was a pitcher for the Canada Moist Talkers, and was with the team from Season β24, Day 15 until Fall Ball. Bullock has played for the Hawai'i Fridays, Atlantis Georgias, and Baltimore Crabs.

Official League Records

Bullock joined the ILB as a pitcher for the Baltimore Crabs with the Return of Blaseball.

During the Season β5 election, Bullock received boosts in all ratings as a part of the Horde Hallucinations and Rollback Netcode blessings.

On Season β6, Day 23, Bullock siphoned some of Hellmouth Sunbeams lineup player Alaynabella Hollywood's pitching ability in a game with Blooddrain weather, bringing it from to .

On Season β7, Day 82, Bullock siphoned some of San Francisco Lovers lineup player Helga Moreno's pitching ability in a game with Blooddrain weather, bringing it from to .

During the Season β9 elections, Bullock received the Friend of Crows modification due to the passing of the Forecast: Birds decree.

On Season β10, Day X, Bullock gained the Mild modification after the Crabs lost to THE SHELLED ONE'S PODS. Following the ascension of the Baltimore Crabs from their Season β10 Internet Series victory, Bullock was traded to the Hawai'i Fridays due to the People's Champion blessing. Additionally, Bullock was targeted by the San Francisco Lovers' Popular by Association blessing. Due to an election mishap, the Lovers instead gained a copy of Bullock, Bontgomery Mullock, while the Fridays kept the original Bullock.

Bullock was traded to the Atlantis Georgias in exchange for Mordecai Kingbird during the Season β16 elections via the Georgias' Equivalent Exchange will, becoming a lineup player in the process.

Bullock was traded to the Baltimore Crabs in exchange for Fish Summer during the Season β17 elections via the Georgias' Equivalent Exchange will.

During the Season β18 elections, Bullock retreated to the Crabs' Shadows as a result of the Crabs' Move will, becoming a pitcher in the process.

During the Season β19 elections, Bullock's pitching increased from 4.3 5.8 as a result of the Crabs' Shadow Infuse will.

On Season β20, Day 9, Bullock joined the Crabs' active roster in exchange for Kaz Fiasco via Chesapeake Racetrack and Ballpark's Fax Machine.

During the Season β21 elections, Bullock gained the Heist Expert modification as a result of the Play to Find Out blessing.

On Season β23, Day 58, Bullock retreated to the Crabs' Shadows in exchange for Alston Cerveza as a result of the Chesapeake Racetrack and Ballpark's Fax Machine.

On Season β24, Day 15, The Gleek Thieves' Guild stole Bullock from the Baltimore Crabs and gave them to the Canada Moist Talkers. On Day 16, Bullock joined the Moist Talkers' pitching rotation in exchange for Eugenia Garbage at Gleek Arena via the Ratified Fax Machine.

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Box of Montgomery Bullock Files

Dust billows as the file box lands on the table. While many archives in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill are unified in some way, this... definitely isn’t one of them. The accompanying Rumor Registry explains all of the contents... wherever it is... but for now you grab the folder labelled IF-17.76 and start reading...

Physiology

Montgomery Bullock is a haunted suit of armor that is spiritually tied to the Montgomery County region of Maryland and its residents. While empty, Bullock is capable of independent locomotion, but lacks the reflexes, muscles, and blood, required to play blaseball competitively. In order to gain the required athleticism, it must keep a live human host inside the armor. To ensure compatibility, that host must be a current resident of Montgomery County, Maryland. When asked about their experiences inside the suit, former hosts universally reply "You just throw the ball" and refuse to elaborate. The armor itself has been kept in pristine condition at the request of Bullock, though while playing for the Atlantis Georgias it has allowed a variety of sea life to latch onto parts of it’s chest because “it looks cool”.

Host Selection Process

The host selection process is conducted by the Montgomery County Department of Parks and Recreation. Residents' names are randomly selected from lists of registered voters and people with drivers licenses. The people randomly selected complete a questionnaire to help determine if they are qualified to serve as Montgomery Bullock's host. Those qualified are randomly chosen to receive a mail summons which typically arrives about 10 days before their assigned game date. Hosts serve for one game and are provided with free* transportation to away games. With Bullock’s recent trades, transportation was assumed to be more difficult for many residents of Montgomery, however recent candidates have assured the city council that it was surprisingly straightforward.

“You still have to drive to games. To get there, you take a weird off ramp inside the Chesapeake Bay bridge-tunnel that you’ve never noticed before, It goes deeper and longer than you expect. It’s very boring but Moco is usually pretty good about keeping you company after your radio signal cuts off -they’ve gotten really into podcasts lately.

So you’re driving along in this dark tunnel until your headlights hit the walls and you realize it isn't dirt and concrete, but glass reflecting back at you. There are shapes moving that you can just barely make out when they get close, and you realize that you’re underwater now, with these huge fish bumping right next to you. There’s also a gas station at one point in case you need to fuel up but I skipped it because I’ve seen that horror movie.

Anyway I arrived at the Bubble, hit like 5 outs, and then had to drive all the way back. At least with Hawai’i I got to relax on the beach for a bit. ”

Controversy

There have been several attempts at ballot initiatives to withdraw the county from the league, but thus far none have been able to secure enough signatures to be placed on the ballot. Those who wish to dispute their eligibility to be selected as a player, but have failed to submit their request to the city council with the required 14 day processing period still often try and outwit the selection process via leaving the borders of Montgomery County before the selection is officially approved. Since the DC assembly has never passed the “Montgomery Extradition Enabling Bill”, this does allow possible candidates for Bullock to avoid their civic duty without completing the necessary forms. Residents of Montgomery that have attempted this have said that as they were driving for the border, they often heard the voice of Bullock in the car, either having great fun with the chase, or listening in on the radio.

Outside the Armour

When not in games, Bullock has been described as distant and unresponsive. Their armor will often sit in storage in the Crabitat, but occasionally their mind will wander and attach itself to other nearby consciousness to stay focused and not be too consumed by the underlying murmur of Montgomery County. Even then, the remnants of their past posts will always reflect on Bullock. Some who have known both Bullock and their hosts have described Bullock as “a walking fossil, informed by all that history”. Bullock themselves has remarked that this is not really so different as anyone would have imprints on them from the ones they are close to.

Return to the Crabs

After being moved to the Hawaii Fridays in Ascension, Bullock spent seven seasons between the Fridays and the Georgias before finally landing back where they started in Baltimore. But not exactly where they started - since Bullock was now batting for some reason. This didn’t stop Bullock from sliding back into their old rhythm, helping their recovering captain Kennedy Loser with his haunting problem (after all, who knows more about the act of being inhabited than Montgomery Bullock). Luckily Bullock’s position was corrected quickly, and even came with an infusion for their trouble making a triumphant return to the Crabs pitching rotation in season 20, exactly 10 seasons after he had left it in the first place.

As he returned to the Crabs however, it seemed that Bullock was not unchanged from their time away - or perhaps even just as he was growing more experienced and lived-in. While once you could rely on Bullock simply storing themselves away in the Crabitat between games, now it seemed that he could be out enjoying the sun, or watching the wind on the Chesapeake Bay. When asked about this Bullock simply explained that “after so many imprints from so many people, it’s hard not to remember what it’s like to feel the sun and enjoy the breeze”. Bullock’s teammates seemed supportive of this change, but did admit it was “a little stressful when Bullock only wandered back in seconds before he was due on the mound and the Umps were starting to get ‘’that look’’”.

Back on the mound Bullock was a familiar presence for the Baltimore Crabs up until being faxed out by an unfortunate activation of Equal Sun in Season 23. Bullock took the time to relax in the Crab’s shadows, giving tips to fellow pitchers, and keeping up with the goings on of the league. When the Crabs became unstable in season 24 Bullock was taken to the Canada Moist Talkers by the Gleek’s thieves guild - something that was difficult to swallow as they watched their team play though their instability, and hoped alongside the rest of the league that they made it out unscathed.


Fan Works