Mindy Kugel

From Blaseball Wiki

Mindy Kugel is a lineup player for the Core Mechanics, and has been with the team since Season 13, Day 64. Kugel has played for the Ohio Worms and the Seattle Garages.

Official League Records

Kugel joined the ILB as a lineup player for the Ohio Worms during the Descension.

Kugel was traded to the Seattle Garages in exchange for Pitching Machine during the Season 12 elections via the Worms' Exchange will, becoming a pitcher in the process, without having played a single game for the Worms since arriving in the ILB.

On Season 13, Day 64, Kugel was exchanged to the Core Mechanics due to Feedback. Kugel was replaced by Jaylen Hotdogfingers.

During the Season 15 elections, Kugel gained the Maximalist modification due to the Sky's the Limit blessing, as well as a pitching stat increase of 4.7 -> 4.8 due to the Pitching Practice blessing.

On Season 17, Day 3, Kugel became a lineup player due to Reverb.

During the Season 18 elections, Kugel retreated to the Mechanics' Shadows as a result of the Mechanics' Move will, resulting in a combined 17.1 -> 17.8 stat increase.

On Season 19, Day 50, Kugel joined the Mechanics' active roster in exchange for Allan Kranch via Core Pillar Center's Fax Machine, becoming a pitcher in the process.

During the Season 21 elections, Kugel's alternate was called and arrived with the Negative modification as a result of the Handful Alternate Trust blessing.

On Season 23, Day 14, Kugel retreated to the Mechanics' Shadows in exchange for Jolene Willowtree via the Core Pillar Center's Fax Machine. On the same day, Kugel joined the Mechanics' lineup in exchange for Allan Kranch via the Ratified Voicemail.

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Background

Mindy Kugel is a teacher and therapist from Ohio, roughly 40 years of age and of Jewish descent. She has what she likes to call "a cane for every occasion", able to coordinate her walking aides perfectly with every outfit. She was noted to have joined the ILB under the pretense of touring the various cities in order to put her skills in teaching and art therapy to work.

Time in Seattle

During the initial elections upon the Ohio Worms' arrival to the ILB, Kugel received a tip from an old friend that the Seattle Garages in particular were desperately in need of her skillset. Upon hearing this request, she packed up her bags and organized a trade of positions between herself and Pitching Machine.

Once arrived, she could clearly see that Bradley had not been exaggerating. Exhausted and having taken more than their fair share of lumps, the anarchist Garages welcomed Kugel, who quickly set to work using her teaching experience and degree in art therapy to help the beleaguered Seattle team. Quickly becoming a mother figure for both the team and their assorted fans (such as the Lil' Roadies), she was soon referred to as 'Ms. Drizzle', a nickname which quickly stuck.

While helping the Lil' Roadies channel their reckless nature into more positive outlets, she also took to helping set the team on the road to recovery from the wounds inflicted upon them from the Discipline Era. Of particular note is her help with encouraging former team captain Theodore Duende to take a step back for his own well-being, as well as redirecting the seemingly endless well of anger in Betsy Trombone into more healthy pursuits, a feat many on the team believed was "pretty close to impossible."

She also, as part of this, got steeped in the Garages' culture in her own way; making instruments for herself by hand and playing along with the bands' sessions, as well as taking the interdimensional tour bus out - as she has become the only other person trusted with driving it, and particularly enjoyed using it to take weekend trips to Armenia with Lori Boston. Spending a lot of time in the Garages' greenhouse, she made fast friends gardening with Paula Turnip, teaching her how to speak to the earthworms. Her and Alaynabella Hollywood hatched a scheme to teach seven-foot-superstar Goodwin Morin how to dance, "height differences be damned."

Arrival in the Core

On Season 13, Day 64, during a Feedback game with the Core Mechanics, Kugel could sense the tension in the air - as none other than former Seattle ace, former Godslayer, and wandering pitcher Jaylen Hotdogfingers had taken the mound against her old team for the first time. Knowing due to Jaylen's proclivity for flickering, she was sure to return - but not knowing who for - had the team on edge, until Kugel smiled and was reportedly heard saying. "Just tell me where to stand, dears. Seems like a reunion is long overdue." Jaylen would proceed to Feedback as expected, and Kugel resumed her journey to help the league as a new member of the Core Mechanics.

Life in the Core

Since coming to the Core, Kugel has embraced the experimental nature of the Mechanics, working on molecular gastronomy has been her main focus but she has not neglected her other culinary passions. She has also engaged a team of engineers to develop a cane delivery system using drones and rail gun technology to ensure she has the correct cane for every situation.

Her Food wizardry has also allowed her to build relationships with her team-mates; upon discovering that Foundry Demons ate minerals she and fellow mechanic Mira Lemma worked to bring fine dining to the Foundry Demon community, experimenting with different combinations to create flavour profiles and bio-chemical responses in those that consume them. This experimentation also opened Kugel's eyes to using small amounts of certain minerals in more traditional food for the other visitors to her eateries.

Over the course of Season 14 and the subsequent Siesta, Kugel became very close with her teammates. As part of this she learned about and then reached out to the Mechanic who had originally been in her place on the Rotation - Lizzy Pasta. Pasta was excited to learn that her spot had been filled by someone who shared her love of the culinary arts and asked her to take over Pasta/Sauce, the foodtruck she had set up with Ruffian Applesauce. She told Kugel that, while Applesauce had never had a chance to get to know her, he would be happy to know someone was continuing his legacy and looking out for the team.

Kugel re-established Pasta/Sauce as a Kosher American-style diner, serving a lot of Pasta and Applesauce’s recipes but now with space to become a center for community gathering. It serves as the post-game hangout spot for the Core Mechanics Blaseball team as well as being a popular destination for other DownTown residents.

Kugel also helped the newly alternated PolkaDot Patterson recreate the lost pimento sandwich recipe from their original universe and the two bonded over the experience. Kugel quickly became a guide for Patterson: introducing her to the core and its residents, showing her around the pillars and introducing her to the rest of the team.

Kugel worked with Jolene Willowtree to source plant based ingredients for her cooking and the two have become friends as the two older members of the team, this group was joined by Christian Combs when they joined the Mechanics and the three of them can often be seen at post game parties enjoying each others company as their younger teammates party the night away.

Kugel runs art classes over the weekends for a variety of age ranges including adults and young children. She also has a popular YlouTube channel where she does tutorials, or simply talks and paints. Her videos have been described as incredibly comforting and very informative.

Personal Life

Kugel enjoys several romantic relationships and self-describes as ‘cheerfully polyamorous’.

Kugel is married to Ohio Worms player Cantus Hojo, and is the reason Hojo joined Blaseball. Kugel and Hojo share a love for country folk music and often have impromptu jam sessions together, much to the delight of anyone near them. Hojo has said in interviews that Kugel is one of the muses that inspires her music. Likewise, Hojo’s fresh garden offerings often find their way into Kugel’s dishes and Kugel credits them as being the second magic ingredient that makes her food taste so good, with the first magic ingredient being love. Despite currently being long distance the two have maintained their marriage and Hojo can often be seen around the Core visiting Kugel as well as spending time with Willowtree and other members of F.R.O.N.T. to explore Core Fauna.

Kugel is also married to Bertrand Kugel, who she met at culinary school in Paris. He sometimes says it was "love at first bite" which usually elicits a groan from everyone in the vicinity, with the exception of Hojo who has a fondness for bad puns. Bertrand also serves as the “official taste tester” of the Kugel household, a title which he bears with pride. Bertrand helps run Kugel's eateries whilst she is playing Blaseball and is a proficient pastry chef in his own right.

While Hojo and Bertrand are not romantically involved they are good friends and take care of the Kugel’s three children together. Elise Kugel runs a coffee shop and artisan bakery in Seattle whilst the youngest two, Bertrand Kugel Jr and Sienna Kugel, have accompanied their parents to the Core. Under her mother’s tutelage, Sienna Kugel has taken up sculpture inspired by the aesthetics of the Core. Her pieces are large welded metal structures adorned with plants which can be found in the Kugel family eateries and public places in the Core.

Beyond her marriages, Kugel is also involved in romantic relationships with several other denizens of the Core. She is known for being a caring and loving partner who is always down for good food and good fun. Mindy has said that her relationships have made her a better and more patient person, and helped her feel at home in the Core.

Alternate

After the Core Mechanics saw that Kugel had been alternated, many of the team went to ask how she was doing and determine the nature of her Alternate. Kugel expressed confusion over this and repeatedly emphasized that she had no idea what they were talking about and she felt the same as ever. Her responses to questions about her life, interpersonal relationships, geopolitics and physical laws all lined up with those expected of this reality.

Shortly after this it was noted that base plates kept going missing from the Core Pillar Center storage room. A recently shadowed and self-proclaimed ‘incredibly bored’ Gia Holbrook took it upon herself to investigate, despite no one else particularly minding due to the ease of getting more base plates. Holbrook eventually ran a stakeout of the Pillars' storage room, only to see Kugel rushing out holding the base plates. Holbrook confronted Kugel who told her that she was working on something that would help her if she wound up batting again.

On Season 23 Day 14, Kugel was shadowed and disappeared. No one was sure where she had gone, which became a much more pressing concern when it appeared she was about to be Voicemailed onto the lineup as the team was being shut out. The search party formed by the Core Shadows Team failed to find Kugel and she didn’t reappear until the next day when, on her first at-bat, a giant mecha came stomping up to the plate. It appeared to be powered by the combined energy of the stolen bases and had six arms, five of which were wielding bats and one which had an oversized replica of one of Kugel’s canes. It was notable for its patchwork appearance which came from the fact that it appeared to have been used as an art project by a group of young children of varying skill levels. Kugel could be seen inside controlling it and making repairs on the fly.

While Mecha-Mindy had some difficulties with exact timing of swings, it enabled Kugel to hit the ball harder and more devastatingly than almost any other player in the ILB as well as allowing her to storm around the bases at record speed.

While Kugel did gain more of an interest in engineering and using the power inherent to Blaseball to make herself stronger than any other even unto the point of toppling the heavens and raising every player trapped in the game to the point of true self-determination, she didn’t lose her love of cooking or her other passions and even combined her new hobbies with her old hobbies. She also took up teaching robotics and chemistry at the NotWest Secondary School of Alternative Experimentation, an academy with a focus on encouraging out-of-the-box thought and unusual solutions to unexpected problems in all fields.


Fan Works

Art