Oliver Loofah

From Blaseball Wiki

Oliver Loofah is a player for the Charleston Shoe Thieves, and has been with the team since Fall Ball. Loofah has previously played for the Seattle Garages.

Official League Records

Loofah joined the ILB as a player in the Shadows for the Seattle Garages with the Return of Blaseball.

During the Season β14 elections, Loofah joined the Garages' lineup in exchange for Summers Pony as a result of the Garages' Foreshadow will. Loofah also received the Minimalist modification as a result of the Min-Maxing blessing.

On Season β15, Day 51, Loofah was  SHELLED in a game with Peanut weather by Baltimore Crabs player York Silk.

On Season β16, Day 32, Loofah was exchanged to the Charleston Shoe Thieves due to Feedback. Loofah was replaced by Howell Franklin.

On Season β16, Day 95, Loofah was freed from their shell by birds.

Loofah was traded to the Seattle Garages in exchange for Terrell Bradley during the Season β20 elections via the Garages' Equivalent Exchange will, becoming a pitcher in the process.

On Season β21, Day 36, Loofah retreated to the Garages' Shadows in exchange for Summers Pony as a result of The Hotdogfingers Memorial Climate Pledge Garage and Parking Facility's Fax Machine. On Day 79, Loofah joined the Garages' lineup in exchange for Emblem Warhorse at The Hotdogfingers Memorial Climate Pledge Garage and Parking Facility via the Ratified Voicemail. On day 83, Loofah was targeted by a Rogue Umpire. Due to the Garages' Fireproof Gift from the Gift Shop rendering Loofah Fireproof, the attempted incineration failed, backfiring and instead incinerating the umpire.[1]

On Season β22, Day 42, Loofah was swept  Elsewhere... and gained the Negative modification as a result of Lotus Mango's Undertaker modification. During the Season β22 elections, Loofah gained the Subtractor modification as a result of the Subtractor Avoidance blessing.

The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.


Oliver 'Olive' 'Liv' Jessica Loofah has always been considered persistent, even by the standards of the Seattle Garages blaseball team and band.

As a former Lil' Roadie, Loofah has lived in the Big Garage for most of her life. A person of Spanish Roma descent, she arrived as a young child and quickly became a fixture of the anarcho-syndicalist collective of children radicalized by Greer Gwiffin and Cedric Spliff. Growing up in such a supportive, if chaotic, environment allowed Loofah to explore her identity comfortably and now identifies as genderfluid. She chose the name "Oliver" in honor of Oliver Mueller, who she looks up to greatly as a personal hero. She also chose the middle name of "Jessica" in honor of Jessica Telephone, another childhood hero of hers.

Growing up in the Big Garage was a unique experience for Loofah. The team and indeed the Big Garage itself are, in a very real sense, her family. The sentience of the Big Garage has become more known over time and the Lil' Roadies are as much it's children as anyone's. The stadium has been known to show support for Loofah when she plays by flashing the spotlights when she scores a run.

Loofah is an avid skater. This includes skateboarding, ice skating, and roller skating, with a heavy focus on roller derby. She is part of the Rat City Roller Derby league on the Jerboa Junction team, competing as a jammer under the derby name Clean Sweep . Also on her team are Malik Destiny, Summers Pony, Betsy Trombone, Chorby Soul, and Alaynabella Hollywood. Matches with the Dallas Bad Butchers are often contentious, as Loofah will seek to impress Allison Abbott while also being driven not to lose against her old friend.

She has been known to use Orbitwheels and Heelys when deciding to make bad choices. This, in turn, is a bad choice. She frequently forgets to wear safety gear, but will be the first to remind others to bring theirs. Loofah has been trying to get roller skating on ice to become more mainstream, however this has yet to take hold. Loofah also owns a sick[Source?] pair of Soaps that she wears on a normal basis, in case she needs to do any radical grinds on a moments notice. Any time that Olive Loofah does a grind, she will hum for the duration of the trick.

In addition to skating, Loofah can often be seen around the city performing parkour. She began practicing parkour in an effort to emulate the late Derrick Krueger, who she looked up to and would often follow him around while freerunning. While Krueger was generally considered unremarkable by many accounts, Loofah greatly enjoyed hanging out with him, despite his insistence that he was trying to nap and to come back later. Contrary to his tired responses, he seemed to enjoy her company as well.

As a former Lil' Roadie, Loofah has had a long history of shenanigans. She was often involved in the efforts to sabotage the Solympic flame every year and was one of the primary co-authors of the Lil' Roadies Manifesto. She still sticks by the manifesto today, even if she is an adult and can set her own bedtime. The Lil' Roadies go wild for her in home games as they see her as one of their own.

Feedback to Charleston

Loofah’s transfer to the Charleston Shoe Thieves after her shocking shelling was unexpected for all, but after being pecked free from the shell, they did their best to take the situation in stride. Former Shoe Thieves player Fitzgerald Wanderlust reached out through characteristically secretive communication networks involving more than a few passenger pigeons and at least three fashionable disguises to let the team know a little about Loofah before he was unshelled, and when she emerged, the team was already excited to properly meet her and show off the newly built skate workshop bench and ramp tucked away in the Choux.

While not participating in shoe heists herself, Loofah apprenticed in the craft of cobbling, and learned many different ways to repair and refurbish shoes. Taking advantage of his love of skating, they began to turn some of the team’s stolen shoes into roller skates, which she donated to local skating enthusiasts who could not afford their own skates. Loofah grew close with Shoe Thieves player Simon Haley during their time on the team, and rumors flew in the splorts tabloids that the two were a couple. The pair were sighted on a rollerskating date along the pier after a game in season 18, and were often seen together after that, including while attending former Shoe Thief Howell Franklin and Iggy Delacruz’s wedding.

When former Garage Goodwin Morin joined the Thieves, Loofah took the opportunity to get to know one of the (literally) towering figures of her former team more personally. The two bonded by sharing tips on their respective hobbies, with Morin teaching Loofah how to craft the perfect workout as she’d learned on the Lift and Loofah teaching Morin some of her favorite skateboard tricks. Loofah was asked about Morin by reporters after the season 18 postseason in which Morin was Vaulted, but refused to be interviewed and reportedly looked “very upset.” In her free time on the Shoe Thieves, Loofah got to know the Choux’s famous gnome population, and taught more than one gnome to skate. The gnomes can sometimes be seen scooting from place to place riding in a single roller skate.

Trade to Seattle

Loofah made quite the impression when she returned to Seattle as a pitcher, pitching a ridiculously scored game that resulted in him joining the Shadows of the team. During her time in the Shadows, before returning as a batter, they got to know Wanderlust better and collaborated with him in her tailor shop, contributing some of her cobbling skills to fixing up shoes from various time periods in exchange for the hottest gossip Loofah picked up from the Choux. She helped out Garages player Summers Pony by fixing her vintage pair of roller skates, though Pony has admitted she mostly just wanted to keep them in good condition and wears another more durable pair for more active skating.

On day 36, season 21, Loofah got the chance to strike back at the forces of the Blaseball universe when she reflected an Umpire’s attack back at the ump, burning it to a crisp. Longtime Garages fans reported that the umpire vaguely resembled the umpire that long-ago incinerated Garages player Derrick Krueger. When interviewed after the incident, Loofah, with their hair slightly singed and a slightly wild look in his eye, said she was “glad to have finally gotten some closure” but would not elaborate further. Loofah has become increasingly skilled at corralling the younger Li’l Roadies, which she attributes to his time training and dealing with the Choux Gnomes. “If you can handle gnomes, you can handle anything,” Loofah was cited explaining to an inquisitive reporter.

The final seasons of the Expansion Era were tumultuous for Loofah after being bestowed with the Subtractor modification. While she was initially crestfallen at the obstacle to contributing to the Garages’ score, they did their best to keep their chin up. After the mysterious Redaction and disappearance of Oliver Mueller, Loofah has been seen frequently peering through a telescope on the roof of the Big Garage, holding out for some hope that she might be able to find her lost friend and mentor somewhere out along the stars.


  • Olive wants to meet Jessica Telephone in person someday. Loofah will sometimes hang around the Jessica Telephone Memorial Skatepark in order to meet her, however she has yet to encounter anyone besides a very convincing look alike who she thinks is trying too hard.
  • She does not know what a bird is. If you try to describe what a bird is to Loofah, you will not know what a bird is either.
  • Loofah is terrified of large bodies of water or immateria and refuses to enter the ocean.
  • Loofah has passed the bar exam, much to her dismay.[2] She is a key member of the Seattle Garages Unlegal Team.

Fan Works


Oliver Loofah is the focus of the following songs: