Abner Pothos

Abner Pothos
Basic Information
Team	Canada Moist Talkers
Former Team(s)	Antarctic Fireballs (Pre-History I), Rising Stars, Seattle Garages
Overall Rating	(2)
Batting	(1)
Pitching	(2.5)
Defense	(2)
Running	(1.5)
Vibes	(2)
External Links	Blaseball-Reference Player Changes Player Page
Biographical Details
Pronouns	it/its
Other Background Information
Instrument	Glockenspiel

Abner Pothos is a player for the Canada Moist Talkers, and has been with the team since Fall Ball. Pothos has previously played for the Antarctic Fireballs during Pre-History I, Seattle Garages, and for the Rising Stars during the ILB Semi-Centennial.

Official League Records

Pothos was first seen as a pitcher for the Antarctic Fireballs after the Fireballs were revealed in the Library, under The First Day, 1st Edition in Pre-History I.

On unknown dates, Pothos was named an MVP a total of three times, resulting in the Ego+++ modification.

During the ILB Semi-Centennial, Pothos played for the Rising Stars. Pothos then fell to the Seattle Garages as a lineup player.

On Season β24, Day 4, Pothos retreated to the Garages' Shadows in exchange for Parker Parra at The Hotdogfingers Memorial Climate Pledge Garage and Parking Facility via the Ratified Voicemail.

During the November 18, 2022 Fall Ball, Pothos fell to the Canada Moist Talkers.

During the Season 1 Election as a result of the Moist Talkers winning the NEW Max Out Pitcher Blessing, Pothos' Zone was maxed out.

Background

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

The aftermath of the ILB Semi-Centennial was a difficult time for the Garages. Not only had they witnessed the Forgery of Jaylen Hotdogfingers, but Parker MacMillan's impending Roam around the league caused much worry. Castillo Turner's return to the rotation was something they expected. Finding two new players on the lineup, however, was not.

Abner Pothos ranks among the Garages' oldest players, although its exact age is unknown. When asked, it claimed that as a player from Pre-History, it was "technically about two thousand" years old. Pothos's teammates provided the immensely helpful clarification that Pothos is indeed "pretty old." Abner Pothos and Wyatt Pothos are distant relatives; Wyatt Pothos has explained the relationship as "I don't know. I think I'm its great-great-second-cousin or something. All I know is that it's even less sure than I am." Both are left-handed and share a blood type. Given the considerable turmoil in the league at the time, the two have agreed to remain at a distance for the time being.

Career on the Garages

Seattle news outlets have described Pothos's style of dress as "eccentric," "trendsetting," and "a little weird but kind of killing it?" Its usual jacket has a high collar, long coattails, and is heavily padded for warmth. It also has a collection of top hats, likewise modified for cold weather. Its outfit somewhat resembles that of a stage magician. This is likely intentional, as Pothos has displayed psychic powers on occasion. Although it was only part of the lineup for four games, attendees reported seeing it telekinetically lifting bats and bat-shaped objects in lieu of swinging them manually. Other mentions of supposed psychic powers and levitation are the subject of debate, as Pothos has also displayed a propensity for stage magic and sleight of hand.

Community

Pothos is Ashkenazi Jewish, and has been an active member of the Seattle-area Jewish community since its return to the world of the living. It frequently offers organizational support to local synagogues' community assistance programs in the Seattle area, and eventually helped establish the Big Garage Tzedakah Fund, a nonprofit that helps members of the community manage donations to others in need. Pothos has also provided translation services in Yiddish and Hebrew for the Seattle Garages Lil' Roadies Lil' Readers Language Workshops.

It is a noted socialist and has supported the Garages' mission as an anarcho-syndicalist collective. Shortly after joining the team, it re-established the Magicians' Union it claims to have run during its time as a Fireball. Members include Betsy Trombone, Nandy Fantastic, Mint Shupe, Borg Ruiz, Yeong-Ho Garcia, Scores Baserunner, Chorby Short, and several others, both Blaseball players and not. Meeting attendees agree that the union is "a really important tool for organizing and understanding each other" and also "a great place to go argue about random crap for like an hour," and as such, it fulfills the two main aims of anarcho-syndicalist meetings. Band members cited Pothos's influence when asked about the subsequent uptick in covers of union-themed folk songs in the band's discography.

Abner Pothos Reports

Pothos is a private person; as active as it is in the local community, it has requested that its personal life remain personal. Only a few sources around Seattle have managed to land a rare interview or otherwise learned something of Pothos from it or its teammates. This time, the Interdimensional Rumor Mill reveals a Rumor from IF-37.433 out of its Rumor Registry...

Teammates' Reactions

Excerpt from "4 minutes and 20 seconds of the garages talking about their funny new grandparent 🥺," a compilation of other fans' clips posted by YouTuber laynafanforever. Several clips were rendered partially inaudible by the accompanying music. The compilation was posted on Day 3, Season 24.

[Theodore Duende addresses reporters at a press conference.]

"Abner's doing alright. We're trying to give it space; a lot of things have changed in the league since its time, obviously, and it's never had to bat before… what? No, no, we're doing fine."

[Malik Destiny chats with some fans while waiting in the on-deck circle.]

"— learning guitar? Hell yeah, keep at it, dude. It — what? Oh, Abner? Abner's cool, you know? Kinda grumpy and old sometimes, like 'back in my day,' but it actually gets along with Betsy, which, I mean, that's crazy. It used to run a union for magicians, so that's back up and running and — oh, no, Betsy doesn't do magic, they just like yelling at people in meetings. One time — oh, I'm up. Good swing, Jimmy! Don't sweat it! Anyway, see you!" [Destiny skips up to bat.]

[Marion Shriffle talks with some roadies for a local music show while they set up cameras.]

"Abner and I don't get along all that much, and that's fine. It's good having someone keeping you in check. Hey! Don't put that there, it's straining the wires — no, the other way! There you go. Good job. Anyway, what was I saying? Abner, right, Abner… I couldn't tell you. I just get frustrated — it wasn't around to see everything we've gone through, and it's got a chip on its shoulder sometimes. It didn't believe The Shelled One was even real at first."

[Magi Ruiz and Fitzgerald Wanderlust sign some autographs for a trio of customers at Wanderlust's shop.]

"Oh, I mean, I've been kind of busy working with OLL-E, but Abner seems nice — Fitz, have you talked to it much?"
"I have. We share a certain understanding, I like to think. It has a mindset of the past, which can be a good thing. But it's from a time when Hexes ran rampant, and that leaves someone rather jaded when it comes to questions of unity."

[Wyatt Mason X and Oliver Loofah share a basket of nachos outside a local restaurant as a fan approaches.]

"Abner? I dunno — MaX, don't choke on your chips, sheesh. Uh, I dunno, Abner and MaX have—"
[MaX interrupts.] "Ugh, more like Abner and New Wyatt Mason, according to it…"
"Hey, hey. If it does that again I'll — hey, look, can you put the camera away? We're—" [The video ends.]

Fan Works

Art

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  Abner's mini blaseballer by @HetreaSky

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  Abner and Aurora by @AAppariton

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  Abner by Cori

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  Abner and its familiar, Aurora Australis, by Cori

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  Abner and its familiar, Aurora Australis, by Cori

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  Coronation Era Abner after becoming "ignited" Art by Lilg8r