Boss

From Blaseball Wiki

The first recorded appearance of Boss.

Boss, sometimes referred to as Ownership, is the third entity to arrive in Blaseball, the boss of The Monitor, and has an ownership stake in Internet League Blaseball.

Visual Appearance

Boss's appearance is that of an ancient Roman coin, depicting Aequitas Augusti, holding the scales of justice in her right hand, and wheat or a cornucopia in her left. The coin says "Aequitas Aug" along the outside, invoking the Latin concept of justice, equality, and fairness, and the justice of Augustus or Caesar.[1][2]

Similarly to the previous two entities in Blaseball, Boss is represented on screen with a single graphic and with distinctive yellow text. Boss is referred to by The Monitor with traditional female pronouns, although Boss also uses plural pronouns to refer to herself, perhaps indicating there is a collective on this position.

Early History and Speculation

The first mention of Boss by name was at the start of Season 10 by The Microphone, who implied that a hostile takeover was underway. The Microphone wrote (in its characteristic non-standard lettering):

JAYLEN[3]
TELL IT[4]
TELL ITS BOSS[5]
WE'RE IN[6]
SHE CAN HAVE THE SHARES[7]
HOSTILE TAKEOVER[8]

The next mention of Boss was directly by The Monitor in the aftermath of Day X, saying Boss is on her way.

Screenshot of a now-deleted tweet about the occupation of The Commissioner's mother.

There is unconfirmed evidence that Boss may be related to The Commissioner. In a now-deleted tweet by the Commissioner on September 8, 2020, he says "my mom works in equity," a potential association with the appearance of Boss as the Latin concept of equity. With the tweet being deleted, it is unknown if this is incorrect or a campaign to hide information.

History of Appearances

Season 10 Elections

Boss first appeared preceding the Season 10 election results, following a brief introduction from The Monitor.

If We could have everyone's attention.
We are so thrilled to have done this Deal.
We're fans, just like you.
But We're not going to lie to you.
Blaseball is a mess.
It's been unfair.
And that upsets Us.
Discipline was the Past
Fair Play is the Future.
And that Future begins right now.
A Grand Siesta will follow Season 11.
We're going to finally start investing in Blaseball.
We're going to Build.
We'll be working directly with our new CEO Parker MacMillan III.
We're all extremely proud of the work he's done.
It's the Dawn of a whole new Era.

Season 11 Championships

Following the Hellmouth Sunbeams' first Internet Series victory, Boss appeared to give congratulations and offer a vision for the future.

Congratulations Hellmouth Sunbeams!
You're winners!
We're all winners!
And this is just the Beginning!
We see you.
We hear you.
You deserve a say.
It's only Fair.
Tomorrow, we write the Future.
Together.

Season 12 Opening

Just before the start of Season 12, Day 1, Boss appeared to open the new season.

Hello Snackholders
On behalf of Ownership
Welcome.
Take a look around.
Notice anything different?
You wrote the Future.
And then We built it.
Internet League Blaseball is back
Bigger and better than ever before.
The wait is over.
It's time to wake up.
Good Luck to all of Our competitors.
And Good Luck to you, Our beloved Fans.
Now Rejoice.
And Play Ball!

Season 12 Latesieta

Following an Emergency Announcement where the Baltimore Crabs appeared to breach back into the ILB, Boss appeared to welcome the Crabs as well as three brand new teams to the league:

Everyone remain calm.
We are actively monitoring the situation.
As a precautionary measure
We have activated Expansion protocols ahead of schedule.
Do not blame yourselves.
This is not your fault.
Accidents happen.
In the meantime
Play must continue.
On behalf of Ownership
Let's all extend a warm ILB welcome to our unexpected additions.
Try to make them feel at home.

Season 12 Endseason

Following Season 12, Day 99, Boss made an announcement:

We made it!
What an incredible season!
Now, We want to assure everyone.
We have the Flooding issue under control.
We're looking into a number of fixes.
But no one wants to hear about that.
Who's ready for some exciting ILB Postseason action?
It's party time!

Season 12 Elections

Before the Season 12 Elections, Boss came to congratulate the Hades Tigers and assure fans about the state of the League:

Congratulations Hades Tigers!
Great news!
We have everything under control.
Thanks to Our swift action
Things seem to be leveling off.
Rejoice!
You can expect less Flooding in the Future.
Meanwhile Our Food and Beverage Director is busy cooking up new tasty treats.
And what an Election!
The Fans have spoken
And We answered.
Smooth sailing ahead.

Season 13 Preseason

At the beginning of Season 13, Boss made an announcement:

Great News
The Numbers are in
The Economy is Booming!
Blaseball is bigger than ever before.
Don't worry about the Fan-made crisis.
Everything is under control.
Focus on what you do best.
Supporting Our Players!
Delivering Our MVPs.
Rejoice. Play Ball!

Season 13 Endseason

Following Season 13, Day 99, the Boss made an announcement:

What an Incredible Season!
Congratulations to Our MVPs.
Under enormous pressure,
These Players have risen to the top!
York Silk
Nagomi Mcdaniel
Aldon Cashmoney
Sexton Wheerer
Wyatt Glover
Goodwin Morin
Peanut Bong
Sutton Picklestein
Jessica Telephone
Pitching Machine
Trust Us
When We say
The weight of this accomplishment cannot be overstated.
You're all winners!

Season 13 Gods' Day

Following the Season 13 elections, both Brisket Friendo and Tad Seeth were given the modification Redacted, which says simply "This player is Redacted." Neither player can be selected as an Idol. Very briefly, Boss appeared to ask Where'd you go, Friendo? A followup from The Commissioner indicated that a missing persons report had been filed, and that "Ownership has enlisted the help of two top-tier investigators and assures no expenses spared."[9]

Season 14 Earlsiesta

During the Season 14 Earlsiesta reading, Boss made an announcement:

Amazing! How fun.
Now, in light of the deepening crisis
It's time we ramp up efforts to stay afloat.
We'll be honest
That will require sacrifice.
It's vital that we all do our part.
We've empowered you with new Ratings
to gauge your Team's contributions.
Each and every one of you is a Credit to the League.
Some personal news
We're going on break!
In Our absence, please direct all questions or feedback
to Our Food and Beverage Director.
Good luck!

Season 15 Opener

Just before the start of Season 15, Day 1, Boss appeared to open the new season.

We're back!
We hope you all had a relaxing Off Season.
We need to level with you.
The Ratings aren't great.
We know you're doing your best
But we all need to pull our weight.
We're here to help.
We tossed that old junk weighing you down
And We come bearing Gifts!
Brand-new Bats, Caps, Shoes, and Gloves!
The tools you need to succeed.
And look at these Concessions!
Who doesn't love a buffet?
Now you can have it your way!
We're loving it!

Season 15 Endseason

Following the regular Season 15 game, Boss arrived to speak on Ratings and Consumers.

What a Season!
Congratulations to our MVP(s)!
Nagomi Mcdaniel
York Silk
Chorby Soul
Look at all of you!
How about a big round of applause
for the Seattle Garages!
These Ratings are through the roof!
Now, We've seen the Consumer reports
And we're ready to ramp up production.
We refuse to leave anyone empty-handed.
You just tell Us what you need.
Help Us help you
Dress for success.

Season 16 Elections

Following the Season 16 Elections, Boss arrived to introduce Lōotcrates and wax poetic on the future of the League.

Snackholders!
What an incredible Season!
Well Done!
How about a round of applause for Our League Historian!
With Lōotcrates' help
We will keep the Past safe.
We will Preserve what We Love.
Drawing from Lōotcrates' Collections
We will continue to build.
To Expand.
Together We'll make History!

Season 17 Elections

Following the Season 17 Elections, Boss arrived to thank Lōotcrates for the Items in Season 17, as well as give Monitor yet another job responsibility.

Amazing!
Thank you Lōotcrates
For sharing your Collections with Us!
The League is already hard at work
Preparing these sacred Landmarks for public access!
In the meantime, please direct any questions
To our new Food & Beverage Director and Tour Guide!
Enjoy the Off Season!

Season 18 Opener

Just before the start of Season 18, Day 1, Boss appeared to open the new season.

Welcome to Opening Day!
Before We begin
A Special Announcement.
Chorby Soul has been Preserved!
Congratulations Chorby!
You're a Legend!
Thanks to your weighty contributions
We have navigated Crises
We have surfaced victorious
The Flooding subsides
Ratings are better than ever before!
Blaseball will sustain Us
In perpetuity.
Let that sink in.
Now Wake Up and Play Ball!

Season 18 Latesiesta

During the Season 18 Latesiesta, Boss appeared to comment on the additions to the ballot revealed after Earlsiesta and formally announce the release of the Chum concession and the A Ruby Tuesday edition in the Library.

We have been made aware
Of recent efforts to undermine our Election.
Please ignore any unauthorized Ballot additions.
We would hate for anything bad to happen.
Speaking of which
A new edition has been approved for Public Access
Take a trip down memory lane!
And We've seen the Consumer Projections
We know what you need
A New Snack!
Thanks to our Food, Beverage, Tourism and Gift Shop Manager
For whipping up a new tasty treat in a hurry!
Play Ball!

Season 19 Earlsiesta

During the Season 19 Earlsiesta, Boss seemed disappointed in the Ratings, and was interrupted by the Reader:

This season isn't pretty
Ratings are tanking.
But there's hope
The Seasonal Readings are cancelled
We've all had enough chaos.
We will Repeal this Corruption
Exit polls are showing a landslide
The Ratings will rebound.
We guarantee it.
It's a slam dunk.
Play Ball!

under achieve
overwhelm

That's enough.
Repeal Turn Tables.
Play Ball.

After the Boss' speech, the Hoops modification referenced to in the speech appeared among Teams' Ballpark Renovation choices.

Season 19 Elections

Following the Season 19 Elections, Boss delivered a message to the ILB before the extended Offseason:

Special Announcement
It's now clear to Us
Blaseball is deeply Divided.
We've recorded massive Losses
The League is in the Red
We've been forced to make a Deal
A Grand Bargain
Inflation will keep Us afloat
As We get things Squared Away
So have your fun
Stay Positive
Win or Lose
Everybody Wins

SUN(SUN) was added as a new ILB Active Rule after her speech.

The Blaseball Roundup: Negative Influence

During the Blaseball Roundup episode, "Negative Influence", the Boss surprised the Anchor with a live press release, etched in gold leaf[10]:

A BARGAIN HAS BEEN STUCK
THE FUTURE IS BRIGHT
EVERYBODY WINS

Season 20, Opening Day

The Boss made remarks on Season 20 just before Day 1 referring to projected growth following the forging of Sun(Sun). Lōotcrates made a cryptic statement afterward.

Rejoice!
Good news
We have Bridged our divide.
We are Unified.
We are Unanimous.
In the light of Sun(Sun)
The Forecast is bright.
We project massive growth for Blaseball.
Exponential growth
Massive gains
The chaos you demand
Together, we will forge new ways to Win.
Victory is secured.

"From the safety of the Delta
The Historian eyes the Horizon
Humming a familiar Rhyme."

"A Sun Set.
A Second Day.
A breaking Dawn."

Season 20, Earlsiesta

During Season 20 Earlsiesta, the Boss was excited to announce the improving Ratings. The Reader made a declaration, then the Depth chart was revealed.

Snackholders!
What an incredible Earlseason!
Ratings are rebounding!
The numbers look promising.
As a reminder,
We have suspended the Seasonal Readings.
This Season, We Promise
We've got things Squared Away.

go long

Season 20 Elections

The Boss announced a bounce back in Ratings and Consumer Reports, and announced the end of the Investigation.

What an incredible Season!
Blaseball is back in business
The Ratings are rising
Consumer Reports are glowing
But some of you aren't pulling your weight.
Staying afloat isn't enough
We must deepen our investments
We will pile it on
Thank you to Our Dynamic Duo
Your hard work
Showed no foul play
We can put all that behind Us
Enjoy Retirement!

After the Boss' announcement, Liquid Friend and Uncle Plasma gained the Legendary modification, were sent to the Vault, and then gained the Yolked modification.

Season 21 Elections

The Boss issued a warning about low Ratings, Liquid Friend and Uncle Plasma's Replicas attacking Consumers, recent revelations from the Library, and blamed the Monitor's oversight. The Boss ended Her announcement with a threat at "those who threaten Our League's stability".

Despite record Successes
Ratings are in Free Fall
We've seen active hostility toward Consumers.
Classified information has been Leaked
All due to another disappointing oversight
By Our Gift Shop Manager.
Security Clearances were bypassed.
Our Historian's generosity was violated.
These Leaks must stop at once.
We have a message to those
Who threaten Our League's stability
We are going to Win.
Like it or not.


Season 22 Earlsiesta

During the Season 22 Earlsiesta, the boss appeared to announce the league's 50-year anniversary the following season and the addition of replicas of several players from before the Return of Blasbeall to the Gift Shop.

Rejoice!
We are thrilled to announce
Coming Next Season
The ILB Semi-Centennial!
Celebrating a half-century of exciting #Blaseball action
A look back at all the fun We've had
Since Blaseball's Return.
And for you students of History
The fun starts Today!
For a Limited Time
The ILB Gift Shop is offering
Ancient Legends!
Stars forged in Antiquity
Ready to return to action!
Grab yours now while supply lasts!

Season 22 Latesiesta

During the Season 22 Latesiesta, the Boss appears to chastise the league for poor Ratings, and announce that one more decree than previously stated would pass in the coming Elections.

Consumer Reports are abysmal
Ratings are at all-time Lows
Given Our generosity
Given all We've done
Your Position is disappointing
Special Announcement
This coming Election
An Additional Decree will pass.
Now
Enjoy your Ancient Legends
As we prepare for the Semi-Centennial!

Fan Works


  1. Arkady Martine [@ArkadyMartine] (18 Oct 2020) "My quick reading is Aequitas Aug., 'the justice/equity of Augustus', so yes, deeply imperial." (Tweet) - via Twitter
  2. Cat Manning [@catacalypo] (18 Oct 2020) "Everything in this thread is correct; I'd also add that the lettering reads "Aequitas Aug", the fairness/justice of Caesar." (Tweet) - via Twitter
  3. The Microphone [@BlaseballMic] (12 Oct 2020) (Tweet) - via Twitter
  4. The Microphone [@BlaseballMic] (12 Oct 2020) (Tweet) - via Twitter
  5. The Microphone [@BlaseballMic] (12 Oct 2020) (Tweet) - via Twitter
  6. The Microphone [@BlaseballMic] (12 Oct 2020) (Tweet) - via Twitter
  7. The Microphone [@BlaseballMic] (12 Oct 2020) (Tweet) - via Twitter
  8. The Microphone [@BlaseballMic] (12 Oct 2020) (Tweet) - via Twitter
  9. BLASEBALL COMMISSIONER [@blaseball] (14 Mar 2021). (Tweet) - via Twitter.
  10. "The Blaseball Roundup: Negative Influence"