Hendricks Richardson
Hendricks Richardson is a lineup player for the Hellmouth Sunbeams, and has been with the team since Season 6, Day 44. Richardson has previously played for the Breckenridge Jazz Hands.
Official League Records
Richardson joined the ILB as a lineup player for the Breckenridge Jazz Hands on Season 2, Day 80 after the incineration of Alexandria Dracaena.
On Season 3, Day 11, Richardson swallowed a peanut and had a allergic reaction, decreasing their batting ability from to . During the Season 3 elections the Jazz Hands received the Evil Wind Sprints blessing, which increased Richardson's baserunning from to .
On Season 6, Day 44, Richardson was exchanged to the Hellmouth Sunbeams due to Feedback. Richardson was replaced by Randall Marijuana.
During the Season 7 elections, the Sunbeams received the Stickum blessing, which boosted Richardson's Defense from to .[1]
On Season 9, Day 24, Richardson siphoned some of Chicago Firefighters batter Justice Spoon's baserunning ability in a game with Blooddrain weather, increasing their own ability to .
During the Season 9 elections the Sunbeams received the Mutually Arising blessing, which increased Richardson's defense from to .
During the Season 10 elections the Sunbeams received the Sharing Signs blessing, which increased Richardson's batting to , after losing stars to siphoning throughout the season.
During the Coffee Cup, Richardson played for Club de Calf as a lineup player.
On Season 13, Day 56, Richardson's baserunning ability was siphoned by LA Unlimited Tacos batter Halexandrey Walton in a game with Blooddrain weather, dropping it from to . During the Season 13 elections the Sunbeams benefited from all four "Bubble" blessings, which increased Richardson's batting, baserunning, and defense by 4%.
COMMUNITY REPORTSThe remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.
The Jazz Hands refer to Richardson as Hendricks "Richie 'Eat the Rich' Rich" Richardson.
Life and Curses
Growing up, Hendricks Richardson was not close to or supported by his rich parents. He transitioned post-high school and soon after he stole his family’s sledding dogs and ran away to Breckenridge. Once he had saved up enough money to attend college, he discovered Marxism and fell in love with the study, and soon entered the world of academia. He soon gained his PHD in Marxist Studies and later became a professor at the same university.
Richardson was a destitute professor who spent decades studying economic systems and writing papers assailing capitalist structures. His graduate dissertation, Historic Examples of Functioning Communism and the Capitalist Structures that Broke Them, included interviews with Alexandria Dracaena, whose lived experience with an African commune proved invaluable to his work. During the writing phase, he once again met Dracaena, and the two eventually became close friends.
On his 70th birthday Richardson was attacked by a Trustchild, a rabid and privileged creature that hunts the poor by the light of the Gold Moon. This scarred Richardson's credit identity with the Curse of the Funded Trust, permanently giving him access to billions of dollars, and turned his withered body into the monstrous hybrid he was known as during his career on the Jazz Hands: an old man with a bushy beard and a baby's face.
After being traded to the Sunbeams, the Hellmouth cursed him for his wealth, transforming him into a giant, non-humanoid dragon. Despite now being a literal, fire-breathing dragon with molten gold for blood, Richardson's blaseball performance only improved a small amount.
Transition to life in Hellmouth
Richardson and Sigmund Castillo became fast friends, due in part to both being new residents of the Hellmouth. When asked about the blooming friendship, Richardson began a lecture about Castillo being a wonderful example of a community governing itself, calling Castillo his "lair buddy".
Outside their blaseball career, Hendricks still maintains a keen interest in participating in academia and educational outreach focused on capitalist critique. Their new draconic form has posed some logistical issues,[2] which they have mostly overcome with assistance from teammates (detailed below).
Hellmouth Community College has been asking Richardson to become their new economics professor since his move, but Richardson has instead been wandering the desert in order to teach the native flora and fauna about communism. His sessions have become very popular with the local cacti. Fellow lineup players Lars Taylor and Nagomi Nava will occasionally be seen at Richardson's lectures, transcribing them for Richardson to later submit to academic journals.[3] The transcriptions are then, reportedly, sent to Sandoval Crossing for proofreading, who then submits[4] the completed papers at the Community College on their way from their apartment to the Stadium.
Richardson's new reptilian anatomy has made them a fan of basking, a hobby enjoyed by many ectothermic entities around Hellmouth. Their team-mate Zack Sanders runs a blog reviewing ideal sunbathing spots around Eastern Utah, which the two love to discuss in the locker rooms before games.
Professor Richardson's Non-Biney Binder
- This is a fork of the IRM, and chooses one entry of many written by the Blaseball community when the page is loaded. Hendricks Richardson has a folder full of memes sent to him by his students at Hellmouth Community College. If you would like to see the full contents of Hendricks Richardson's Non-Biney Binder, add additional entries; click Rumor Registry. If you would like to edit this entry, click Page-32.
This system is based on the Interdimensional Rumor Mill, which can be read about at Interdimensional Rumor Mill.
- This is a fork of the IRM, and chooses one entry of many written by the Blaseball community when the page is loaded. Hendricks Richardson has a folder full of memes sent to him by his students at Hellmouth Community College. If you would like to see the full contents of Hendricks Richardson's Non-Biney Binder, add additional entries; click Rumor Registry. If you would like to edit this entry, click Page-32.
Page 32
Source: Email
From: Throckmorton Smooth ([email protected])
Subject: For Your Consideration
Message body:
Sup Prof,
See you at ECON 313!
-Throcky
Trivia
- After Richardson’s transformation into a dragon, he was adopted as a cousin by a large red dragon from Wales. They have a rather tense correspondence mainly based around scale care tips.
- Richardson will act insulted if you ask him if he's got a hoard, but never mentions his cupboard full of trans flag themed merchandise students keep buying him, or his binder full of trans memes Throcky sends him, which he prints out and laminates. Throcky named the binder “The Non-bindey.”
- Richardson has 20 minutes of office hours every third Tuesday, but you're welcome to speak to him whenever he's out in the wilderness, assuming you can find him.
- One of the many events Richardson funds with his blaseball salary is the annual Randall Marijuana Memorial Ski Trip, an opportunity for the Hellmouth’s trans youth to go skiing and to give them a social opportunity.
- Richardson has a tendency to buy an excessive number of expensive items while under the effects of the full moon. After one such fugue state where he unknowingly bought a Tlesla, teammates Iggy Delacruz and Miguel James set up a stream where viewers could donate money to watch a, quote, “Dragon go to town on a Tlesla (NOT CLICKBAIT!!)” All money raised from this stream was donated to Hellmouth Fund for Trans Adaptation, a charity devoted to allowing trans people in the Hellmouth to succeed post-adaptation.
- Hendricks Richardson hit a ground out to Joshua Butt. This play occurred on Round 1 of the Season 9 Wild Card series against the Chicago Firefighters, and it temporarily stopped time. Following this incident, Richardson has become interested in studying fluctuations in the space-time continuum, particularly those caused by butts. Some witnesses to the event report that, instead of time stopping, Richardson took his time at the plate as an opportunity for an impromptu lecture on capitalism, which stopped game proceedings. These reports are disputed.
Gallery
Jazzhands-era Tlopps card, prior to Hellmouth Adaptation.
by Glempy
by @Krasi_Savov
by @Krasi_Savov
by @Krasi_Savov
Mini-Blaseballer by @HetreaSky
References
- ↑ This change was not reflected in the Season 7 Election Results. Stickum was only applied to pitchers when it should have been the entire roster. Seemingly as consolation, three Sunbeams' batters were given a 1 star increase in defense.
- ↑ the main one being "big ol' claws".
- ↑ Taylor's preferred method of recording is ten laptops simultaneously, while Nava "apparently makes do with just typing it all out on her phone. Damned if I know how she does it."
- ↑ "Submission" of any academic correspondence for publication consists of dropping the printed work (or a USB drive) into a mini-hellmouth on the college campus. The process is described as "generally less agonizing" than more typical submission processes.
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