Difference between revisions of "Ascension"

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((Clarified article to state the fact that ascension is no longer.))
(adding Crabs Descension/Coin Announcement/New Big League teams)
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About a quarter of the way through Season 11, the groundskeepers (Discord server moderators) discovered [http://www.blaseball2.com/ the location of the Baltimore Crabs], and along with it, the [[Blagonballs|1-Blood Blagonball]]. The location of the Crabs appeared to be at a sort of Gateway in the clouds, with a second, red gate blocking the exit of the Crabs. The newly-promoted [[The Commissioner|CEO Commissioner Prime Minister Parker MacMillan III]] clarified in a tweet, "The Crabs are playing. The Big Leagues are not for your viewing pleasure. Our Optics extend as far as the Gateway 🩸⚾"<ref>BLASEBALL CEO COMMISSIONER PM [@blaseball] (20 Oct 2020). [https://twitter.com/blaseball/status/1318586634158231553?s=20 (Tweet)] - via Twitter.</ref>
 
About a quarter of the way through Season 11, the groundskeepers (Discord server moderators) discovered [http://www.blaseball2.com/ the location of the Baltimore Crabs], and along with it, the [[Blagonballs|1-Blood Blagonball]]. The location of the Crabs appeared to be at a sort of Gateway in the clouds, with a second, red gate blocking the exit of the Crabs. The newly-promoted [[The Commissioner|CEO Commissioner Prime Minister Parker MacMillan III]] clarified in a tweet, "The Crabs are playing. The Big Leagues are not for your viewing pleasure. Our Optics extend as far as the Gateway 🩸⚾"<ref>BLASEBALL CEO COMMISSIONER PM [@blaseball] (20 Oct 2020). [https://twitter.com/blaseball/status/1318586634158231553?s=20 (Tweet)] - via Twitter.</ref>
  
 +
== Descension ==
 +
During the Latesiesta of [[Season 12]], this announcement appeared:
 +
<blockquote>
 +
'''''EMERGENCY ALERT''
 +
'''<br />
 +
'''''BREACH DETECTED'''''
 +
<br />
 +
'''''FLOOD WARNING'''''
 +
<br />
 +
'''''THE COIN FLIPS'''''
 +
<br />
 +
'''''OVER UNDER'''''
 +
<br />
 +
'''''UNDER OVER'''''
 +
<br />
 +
'''''IMMATERIA MATERIA'''''
 +
<br />
 +
'''''EMERGENCY ALERT'''''
 +
</blockquote>
 +
Following the '''''EMERGENCY ALERT''''', the [[Boss]] spoke:
 +
<blockquote class="coin">
 +
Everyone remain calm.
 +
<br />
 +
We are actively monitoring the situation.
 +
<br />
 +
As a precautionary measure
 +
<br />
 +
We have activated Expansion protocols ahead of schedule.
 +
<br />
 +
Do not blame yourselves.
 +
<br />
 +
This is not your fault.
 +
<br />
 +
Accidents happen.
 +
<br />
 +
In the meantime
 +
<br />
 +
Play must continue.
 +
<br />
 +
On behalf of Ownership
 +
<br />
 +
Let's all extend a warm ILB welcome to our unexpected additions.
 +
<br />
 +
Try to make them feel at home.<br />
 +
</blockquote>
 +
 +
Following this announcement from the Coin, the [[Baltimore Crabs]] rejoined the League as part of [[Mild League#Mild_Low|the Mild Low Division]], along with three new teams from the Big Leagues, the [[Ohio Worms]] (joining [[Wild League#Wild_Low|the Wild Low Division]]), the [[Atlantis Georgias]] (joining [[Wild League#Wild_High|the Wild High Division]]), and the [[Core Mechanics]] (joining [[Mild League#Mild_High|the Mild High Division]]. The teams entered [[Party Time]] shortly thereafter, and are able to participate in the [[Season 12]] Elections.
 
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<references />

Revision as of 00:57, 5 March 2021


Ascension refers to rule 6b of The Book of Blaseball, which states "If a team wins three championships, they, and Blaseball, shall ascend." As of the beginning of Season 12, the Baltimore Crabs are the only team to have ascended. In addition, it has been confirmed that there will be no more ascensions. As a result, the rule is now struck out from the book.

Early History

Ascension was first revealed at the end of Season 1 when The Forbidden Book was opened and revealed to be a highly redacted rulebook. Rule 6b was quickly noticed for its clarity among dozens of vague and redacted entries.

At the end of Season 2, the Philly Pies had won two championships, becoming the first team to be eligible for Ascension with their next victory.

In Season 3 and Season 4, the Hades Tigers won both championships back to back, becoming the second team to be eligible for Ascension with the next victory. At the time, both the Pies and the Tigers were in the Evil League, making only one of the two teams eligible for any given Internet Series.

The next team to be eligible for Ascension was the Baltimore Crabs, who won the Internet Series in Season 6 and Season 8. The Crabs made it to the Internet Series in Season 9, but were thwarted by the Charleston Shoe Thieves.

Crabs Ascend

In Season 10, the Baltimore Crabs defeated the Charleston Shoe Thieves in a rematch in the Internet Series, in a 3 game sweep. Immediately following, the Crabs faced off against The Shelled One in Day X. The Shelled One had some words for the three-time champions:

THIS IS YOUR CHAMPION?
THEM?
CRUSTACEANS
YOU BELIEVE YOU ARE WORTHY
TO GO UP?
TO CLIMB?
FOOLS
MY PODS

The Crabs were then instantly defeated by THE SHELLED ONE'S PODS, however, the Shelled One left some hints as to what Ascension entailed for the Crabs.

PATHETIC
LET THIS BE A LESSON
THE BIG LEAGUES ARE CALLING

The next day, as a part of the Season 10 election results, the League learned that the Crabs had been "Called Up" and replaced in the ILB by the Tokyo Lift. The Baltimore Crabs were no longer listed as an active team in the Wild League and would not be participating in Season 11.

At the start of Season 11, however, a new tracker appeared on the Blaseball Bulletin, called Telescope, that displayed a win-loss record for the Crabs in the Big Leagues, with the Crabs having posted majority losses. An issue of The Blaseball Beat released that covered the events of Season 10 asked readers, "Wait a minute where ARE the Crabs?"[1]

About a quarter of the way through Season 11, the groundskeepers (Discord server moderators) discovered the location of the Baltimore Crabs, and along with it, the 1-Blood Blagonball. The location of the Crabs appeared to be at a sort of Gateway in the clouds, with a second, red gate blocking the exit of the Crabs. The newly-promoted CEO Commissioner Prime Minister Parker MacMillan III clarified in a tweet, "The Crabs are playing. The Big Leagues are not for your viewing pleasure. Our Optics extend as far as the Gateway 🩸⚾"[2]

Descension

During the Latesiesta of Season 12, this announcement appeared:

EMERGENCY ALERT
BREACH DETECTED
FLOOD WARNING
THE COIN FLIPS
OVER UNDER
UNDER OVER
IMMATERIA MATERIA
EMERGENCY ALERT

Following the EMERGENCY ALERT, the Boss spoke:

Everyone remain calm.
We are actively monitoring the situation.
As a precautionary measure
We have activated Expansion protocols ahead of schedule.
Do not blame yourselves.
This is not your fault.
Accidents happen.
In the meantime
Play must continue.
On behalf of Ownership
Let's all extend a warm ILB welcome to our unexpected additions.
Try to make them feel at home.

Following this announcement from the Coin, the Baltimore Crabs rejoined the League as part of the Mild Low Division, along with three new teams from the Big Leagues, the Ohio Worms (joining the Wild Low Division), the Atlantis Georgias (joining the Wild High Division), and the Core Mechanics (joining the Mild High Division. The teams entered Party Time shortly thereafter, and are able to participate in the Season 12 Elections.


  1. The Game Band (19 Oct 2020). Issue 10. The Blaseball Beat.
  2. BLASEBALL CEO COMMISSIONER PM [@blaseball] (20 Oct 2020). (Tweet) - via Twitter.