Willow Dice

New Player
This player was recently called up to the ILB. If you would like to write lore, please put it on the Talk page for community discussion.

Willow Dice
Basic Information
Position	Lineup Player
Team	Moab Hellmouth Sunbeams
Former Team(s)	Miami Dale
Status	Active
Batting	(4.5)
Pitching	(2.0)
Defense	(2.5)
Running	(1.0)
Vibes	(0.5)
Dates Active	Jun 18, 2021–present
External Links	Blaseball-Reference Player Changes Player Page
Personal Information
Evolution	Base
Peanut Allergy	Allergic
Pregame Ritual	Thumb wrestling
Coffee Style	Cold Brew
Blood Type	O No
Fate	96
Other Background Information
Heliolatric Zodiac	Cursed Absolution

Willow Dice is a lineup player for the Moab Hellmouth Sunbeams, and has been with the team since Fall Ball. Dice has played for the Miami Dale.

Official League Records

Dice joined the ILB as a player in the Shadows for the Miami Dale as the Dale's Season β20 Overbracket Playoff Birth.

On Season β21, Day 93, Dice joined the Dale's lineup in exchange for Stout Schmitt at Miami International Arena via the Ratified Voicemail.

On Season β22, Day 43, Dice swallowed a stray peanut and had a allergic reaction, resulting in a combined 13.0 → 7.6 stat decrease. On Day 69, Dice retreated to the Dale's Shadows in exchange for Schmitt at Miami International Arena via the Ratified Voicemail.

During the December 2, 2022 Fall Ball, Dice fell to the Moab Hellmouth Sunbeams.

During the Season 1 elections, Dice's batting increased 4.0 → 4.5 as a result of the NEW Batting Boost blessing.

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

History

Dubious origins

Accounts of Dice's life prior to her signing on to the Miami Dale are amurk with contradictions; Dice took a particular delight in harassing interviewers throughout her less-than-season stint on the Dale's active roster with a new origin story every time the cameras were rolling.

La Fiesta regulars and Dice's teammates were able to corroborate several consistent threads to her tall tales: chiefly, that Dice was some manner of Bird who wished upon the Party Rock to be transfigured into a human. While her reasons for abandoning the avian life also appear to change with every appearance of Dice's in front of reporters, she has remained consistently enthusiastic about three things: partying, being goth, and thumbs.

Yorenithologists are working tirelessly to catalogue and make sense of Willow Dice's origins, and have presented one piece of evidence here for your perusal. If you would like to see all the rumors about Willow, or perhaps contribute another; click Rumor Registry. If you would like to edit this entry, click IF-51.502.
This system is based on the Interdimensional Rumor Mill, which can be read about at Interdimensional Rumor Mill.

Pelican Island???

The now-inactive message board of Floridian Ornithologists and Birders For Partying All Night featured a discussion thread, 645 pages long, of members sharing, analysing, and debating evidence to confirm Dice's original species. Anecdotal evidence from several users who were on board the Dale's party yacht La Fiesta during Season 21 of Blaseball suggest that Dice's earlier self-introductions had fewer inconsistencies.

Key features of Dice's self-professed origins included: a home "up north a bit", which she left because of the "asshole egret neighbors"; several escapades as she made her way to Miami, including crashing "on the couch" of some turtles in Jupiter and a "spa day at Palm Beach Zoo"; and "a cool party trick she said she could 'still' pull off where she'd swallow a can of Sparkleyum™ Edible Glitter whole".

These key points have, somehow, convinced several in the FOaBFPAN community that Dice was a brown pelican raised in a rookery of east-central coastal Florida.

Dice declined to comment on the allegation when it was brought to her attention by a reporter, instead getting distracted and quite excited by the idea she had a "fan club".

Life in Moab Hellmouth

Dice fell to Moab during Fall Ball, having apparently forgotten the resident team had borne witness to such ignominious moments in her early career, such as: a horrific allergic reaction, and also being Voicemailed back into the Dale's shadows by a Beams shutout. Dice quickly struck up friendships with new teammates Dunn Keyes and Cravel Gesundheit, forming a particularly strong bond with the latter. The two were often spotted together about town by locals, and also in the nearby wilderness engaging in "inscrutable activities which. we're going to assume, is just how a pile of rocks and a former bird hang out".

Dice's Adaptation is currently unknown.

Trivia

• Dice's surname is pronounced by many^who? like "Decay".
• Dice's favorite food is mac and cheese, something of an obsession of hers ever since she learned about it as a staple human food.
• Dice has been banned from Moab's only ice cream parlor, the Basking Robins.

Fan Works

• 

  by Olive

---