Bonk Jokes

Bonk Jokes
by Vixen
Basic Information
Position	Lineup Player
Team	Yellowstone Magic
Former Team(s)	Yellowstone Magic
Status	active
Batting	(4.3)
Pitching	(4.0)
Defense	(3.7)
Running	(4.1)
Modifications	AlternateThis Player is an Alternate... Player is replaced with an alternate reality version, stats are randomized.  ScatteredThis Player returned from Elsewhere a bit Scattered.
Items	Sunglasses ●
Dates Active	Oct 14, 2020–present
External Links	Blaseball-Reference Player Changes Player Page
Personal Information
Evolution	Base
Peanut Allergy	Not Allergic
Pregame Ritual	Air drumming
Coffee Style	Light & Sweet
Blood Type	O No
Fate	59

Bonk Jokes is a player for the Breckenridge Jazz Hands, and has been with the team since Fall Ball. Jokes has previously played for the Yellowstone Magic.

Official League Records

Jokes joined the ILB as a lineup player for the Yellowstone Magic on Season 10, Day 39 after the incineration of Annie Roland.

During the Coffee Cup, Jokes played for the Light & Sweet Electric Co. as a pitcher.

On Season 21, Day 95, Jokes retreated to the Magic's Shadows in exchange for Halexandrey Walton at Yellowstone National (Ball)Park via the Ratified Voicemail.

During the Season 21 Elections, Jokes received Alternate and Negative when the Magic were blessed with Shadow Alternate Trust. As a result of becoming an alternate, Jokes's stats were randomized.

On Season 22, Day 49, Jokes joined the Magic's lineup in exchange for Bones Piazza at the Yellowstone National (Ball)Park via the Ratified Voicemail.

During the Season 22 elections, Jokes lost the Negative modification as a result of the Roster Flip blessing.

During the December 2, 2022 Fall Ball, Jokes fell to the Breckenridge Jazz Hands.

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Box of Bonk Jokes Files

Dust billows as the file box lands on the table. While many archives in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill are unified in some way, this... definitely isn’t one of them. The accompanying Rumor Registry explains all of the contents... wherever it is... but for now you grab the folder labelled IF-8.847 and start reading...

Bonk Jokes is rumored to be the former host of the infamous Hlockey mascot Gritty, feared menace and patron saint of the Philadelphia greater metropolitan area. It is unknown how or why the host of a Hlockey mascot would travel hundreds of miles and challenge the Laws Immateria to instead play blaseball, or what happened to Gritty's ████. However, following the ████ of 20██, the hand of Gritty was felt throughout Philadelphia, resting uncomfortably on the shoulders of each resident. These dates and events are known to roughly correspond to the signature of Bonk Jokes to the Yellowstone Magic as a replacement hitter in the event of an incineration.

Some fans theorize that Bonk represents a union of the many souls that once fueled Gritty's apotheosis, but Jokes seems uninterested in answering such queries, or is perhaps too internally conflicted to formulate an answer that might satisfy the majority of them.

Fan Works

Fanfiction

For more fanfiction, see the Bonk Jokes tag on AO3.

• last call by waveridden - One last Yellowstone Magic card game night.

• 

  Bonk by ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

• 

  Season 11 rookie card by ChewyPudding#7060

• 

  ASL, by batfights

• 

  Learning about Weatherman, by batfights

• 

  Making a friend with Chorby, by batfights

• 

  Three of Wands
  by @birbteef

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