Hellmouth (town)

Moab Hellmouth
Satellite view of the Moab Hellmouth Region
Type	Town
Level	16
Location	Utah, United States

This page is for Moab Hellmouth, the town which is home to the Hellmouth Sunbeams. For the extradimensional entity which gives the town its name, see Hellmouth (entity).

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The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Moab Hellmouth is a small town in the desert of Utah, given its name by its position on the edge of the Hellmouth. The town is home to the Hellmouth Sunbeams.

Description

Moab Hellmouth is considered to be one of the least habitable cities to host a blaseball team due to its arid climate, connection to Hell, and numerous teeth — by and large, Moab Hellmouth is inhospitable to most living beings. It is not clean or safe, and its attempts to lure people towards it are actively opposed by the Hellmouth Anti-Tourism Board who make sure Moab Hellmouth is not welcoming to anyone (except for maybe JEFF!). This is no easy task, since the Moab region of eastern Utah is widely known for its National Plarks and outdoor recreation areas.

When the Hellmouth formed, all written references to Moab, Utah were replaced with references to Hellmouth instead, with the resulting documents and signage appearing to be designed and spaced properly for the altered text. Certain references to Moab were destroyed via spontaneous combustion instead, although it is still unclear why some were destroyed and some were replaced.

Some time after the conclusion of the Expansion Era, collective memories of Moab (as it existed before the opening of the Hellmouth) were restored en masse. The restoration of collective history has not, however, decreased the dangers associated with visiting Moab Hellmouth.

Culture

Hell's Best SumBeans

Presence next to the Hellmouth has encouraged the development of a unique culture in the town, particularly in response to shared experiences such as Adaptation and the Tug. The community is mostly self-sufficient, with strong interpersonal ties necessary to allow survival in the hostile environment. Money is unheard of in the local environment, relying instead on a bartering system. This may explain how certain members of the Hellmouth Sunbeams have achieved credit scores previously considered impossible.

Lack of economy has not slowed down local industry, which has taken advantage of the new opportunities, and spawned various local delicacies, the most famous of which are Hell's Best SumBeans and SUNN light.

A number of traditions have arisen within the tight-knit community. Community events such as the creation of a new Outback Steakhouse are always well attended. Non-residents are asked to please not travel to Moab Hellmouth for the purpose of attending community events, such as the upcoming Sigmund Castillo open day. Many traditions take advantage of the unique environment, such as the practice of climbing teeth to watch the sunrise, cutting smaller teeth down to keep in a home and decorate, and using mini-mouths (small temporary Hellmouths) as a form of garbage disposal.

There is a strong legal tradition, with certain high profile legal cases being hosted in the Bone and Tooth courts, to take advantage of the loose legal structure. Many students of Hellmouth Community College choose to major in law, although a variety of other subjects are available, such as Illegal Physics. If a particularly desired course is not available, students are advised to sign up as a lecturer and teach it themselves. This system explains the existence of a Russian Literature course, taught by Howell Franklin.

Residents

Local historian Milo N. J. Cooper has been cataloguing Hellmouth residents and their experiences in the town for many years, in order to preserve a record of this unique community. Their profiles of residents are presented in a monthly newsletter. This time, the Interdimensional Rumor Mill reveals a Resident from IF-101.69 out of its Resident Registry...

Myrella Smooth owns the local real estate agency, Desert Wind Realty. Whether you’re in the market for authentic screaming walls, a live-in monster-under-the-bed, or a tar pit hot tub, Smooth is confident that her agents will be able to find every house hunter a property that fits their every need and want.

While not working, Smooth enjoys hot yoga, tlennis, and "scrapbooking". Smooth also hosts a biweekly book club. Discussion typically occurs over red wine with topics ranging from the attendees' children's lives, gossip about local businesses, and the occasional "book".

Her son, Throckmorton Smooth is a TA at the local community college, and niece Yummy Elliott plays for the LA Unlimited Tacos.

Locations

• Basking Robins
• The Bone Zone
• The Dope Korean Restaurant
• Hahn Fox's Pool
• Hellmouth Community College
• Moab Museum
• Seven Heleven
• Shadow Moabbey
• The Solarium
• Randall Marijuana Memorial Cat Café
• Romayne's Romaine (closed)

See also

• Cuisine of Hellmouth