Randall Marijuana Memorial Cat Café

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COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.
Sunbeams players Hahn Fox and Nagomi Nava at the cat café.
Hahn Fox and Nagomi Nava at the cat café. By larkine

The Randall Marijuana Memorial Cat Café was built to house Randall Marijuana's "singular" cat after his feedback to Breckenridge and subsequent incineration. Originally run by Alaynabella Hollywood, Nagomi Nava took over most duties, with additional assistance from Hahn Fox after Hollywood's transfer to the Boston Flowers.

As the safest and, as some customers have described, "mellowest" place in Hellmouth, it is also a popular place for fans and members of the Hellmouth Sunbeams to gather. On display within the Minecraft-themed café is Marijuana’s collection of Bionicle figures.

Cats currently available to meet at the café include Frank, Artemis, and Clonk Fuzzball the Third. Following the Season β10 postseason and the blossoming "Hellennials" anti-rivalry, lucky visitors may also spot Millie the Bodega Cat worming her way across the café, in and out through a pair of cat flaps which mysteriously appeared on the skirting boards near the start of Season β11.

Randall Marijuana's Cat

Randy's Cat Café is actually home to several cats, but Randy was too stoned to realize it. If you would like to see a list of all cats in the café, or give a new cat a home in the Café, click Randy's Cat Café. If you would like to edit this cat, click C-Crunchy, Splotchy, Lumpy, and Spikey. This system is based on the Interdimensional Rumor Mill, which can be read all about at Interdimensional Rumor Mill.

Crunchy, Splotchy, Lumpy and Spikey

Crunchy, Splotchy, Lumpy and Spikey are four kittens in a box that Randall Marijuana found one day riding home on his skateboard. As the box read "Free To A Good Home", he took them in. As soon as he entered his home, he found that the kittens were bound to the box. They only exist inside the box and with each other. Randall decided to attach the box to an autonomous robotic vacuum cleaner so they could move around.

When Randall was asked about their names, he simply replied, "It's what they felt like when I pet them."