Broken Ridge Jazz Hands

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Revision as of 21:12, 15 September 2020 by CompliensCreator00 (talk | contribs) (category fix)

The Breckenridge Jazz Hands are a Blaseball team in the Wild High division of the Wild League. They have been a part of Internet League Blaseball since Season 1.

Roster

Lineup

Pitchers

Former Players

Incinerated Players

Feedback Swaps

Blessings and Trades

Season Results

Season 1: 57-40 as of Day 98. The results of the final 2 games are currently unknown. Entered the playoffs as the 2nd seed from the Evil League. Lost 3-0 to the Philly Pies in the quarterfinals. Received no blessings during the Offseason.

Season 2: 55-44, entered the playoffs as 4th seed from the Evil League. Defeated the Hades Tigers 3-2 in the quarterfinals. Lost 3-0 to the Philly Pies in the Semifinals. Received no blessings during the Offseason.

Season 3: 50-49, entered the playoffs as the 4th seed from the Evil League. They lost to the Hades Tigers 3-2 in the quarterfinals. Received the Evil Wind Sprints and Highway Robbery blessings during the Offseason. Subjected to the Headhunter and Rigour Mortis blessings.

Season 4: 58-41, entered the playoffs as the 2nd seed from the Evil League. They won against the Philly Pies 3-1 in the quarterfinals, then were swept 3-0 by the Hades Tigers in the semifinals. Received no blessings. Subjected to the Questioning Their Every Decision blessing. In the Season 4 Elections, the Jazz Hands were also hit with Targeted Shame, which states that should the Jazz Hands be shamed, they will start the next run with negative runs equal to their shame.

Season 5: 58-41, entered the playoffs as the 2nd seed from the Evil League. They won against the Hades Tigers 3-0 in the quarterfinals, then won against the Canada Moist Talkers 3-2 in the semifinals. They lost 2-3 against the Chicago Firefighters in the grand championships. Received the Seduction blessing. Subjected to the The Plan? Hit From The Mound blessing.

Season 6: 59-40, entered the playoffs as the 2nd seed from the Wild League. They won against the San Francisco Lovers 3-2 in the quarterfinals, then lost to the Baltimore Crabs 3-0 in the semifinals. Received Single-Season Fourth Strike and Gravity Boots blessings, the latter of which went to Steph Weeks. Subjected to the Headhunter blessing.


Team Overview

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Know more about the Jazz Hands' history? Add it at Breckenridge Jazz Hands/History!

Stadium

The Jazz Hands home games are played in a stadium known as The Pocket. Regardless of the weather outside the stadium, inside of The Pocket it is always snowing.

Moist Talkers Rivalry

The team is in an official rivalry with the Canada Moist Talkers ever since Season 2, when the Jazz Hands and Moist Talkers ended the season with a tied win-loss ratio. The contract to make the rivalry official was signed by █████ representing Breckenridge and ████████ representing Canada. Neither has been seen since.

In their rivalry, the Jazz Hands invoked a curse upon the Moist Talkers, declaring that they shall suffer "The Dry Silence." What exactly the Dry Silence is, how it would affect the Moist Talkers, or if it has already taken place, is unclear.

In a series of threads after the Season 5 Elections, the Moist Talkers and the Jazz Hands negotiated, instated, and announced a new contract of rivalry. While the previous terms demanded vitriol between the teams, the current contract only demands vitriol during direct match-ups. The rest of the time, the teams are obligated to interact as friendly rivals, and players are permitted to be friends.

Staff

Coaches

The team has no coach as the players believe their best blaseball is played when the team is just jamming and not following a plan. This feeling was summed up by Lowe Forbes, saying "blaseball is all about going out there and listening to each other, not some coach".

Campos Arias echoed this point, saying "It's about the groove of it all. About feeling in sync with your players, and riffing off of each other. You can't focus too much on what's happening on the field, you've got to watch for the plays we're not making to really see what's going on." The team refused to comment further as Campos and Lowe had explained it perfectly.

Despite the lack of coach, the team does have a number of staff who work with the team, such as:

  • Jimmy Forest, Head Chef
  • Oakley Sterling, Groove Evaluator
  • Liberty Picante, Kickline Coordinator

Mascot

The mascot of The Breckenridge Jazz Hands as of Season 3 is the Breckenridge Slide-Trombone Bolter.

Fans

Know more about the Jazz Hands' fan culture? Add it at Breckenridge Jazz Hands/Fan Culture!

The fans of the Breckenridge Jazz Hands are known as the Breckenridge Jazz Hands' Band. They are known for performing the unofficial fight song of the Breckenridge Jazz Hands, the Breckenridge Jazz Hands' Band Stand Chant, which often lasts for hours. More than once, the Breckenridge Jazz Hands' Band have continued the Breckenridge Jazz Hands Band Stand Chant for hours after a game has ended, sometimes continuing the chant until the next game begins, which causes it to begin all over. Fans are also encouraged bring musical instruments to Jazz Hands games, with impromptu music performances often breaking out in the stands.

Fans have also been known to chant "CATCH 👐 THESE 👐 HANDS 👐" and its variant "CAN'T 👐 CATCH 👐 THESE 👐 HANDS 👐" It is currently unknown how fans can vocalize the sound of an emoji. They can also be heard yelling "GET THE JAZZ IN YOUR HANDS" and "GET YOUR HANDS IN THE GAME" as a call and response.

Fans of the Jazz Hands who want to contribute noise but do not play an instrument often wear beaded bracelets or other noisemakers on their wrists so that when they do a jazz-hands motion it creates a loud rattling sound. Onlookers have described the sound as "somewhere between marbles falling down stairs and an army of dancing skeletons."

Fan Art

Have Jazz Hands fan art? Add it at Breckenridge Jazz Hands/Fan Art!

Logo by Cobaltcakes.

Official fight song (by MackToTheFuture):

We are here for the Jazz Hands

They're here for the Jazz Hands Band

We're the team you just can't stop

The Commissioner is doing a great job

Jazz Hands uniform design by TedFallenger (NSFW Twitter).