Chorby Short

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Chorby Short is a pitcher for the Core Mechanics, and has been with the team since Fall Ball. Short has played for the Yellowstone Magic, New York Millennials, Hawai'i Fridays, Boston Flowers, Hades Tigers, Dallas Steaks, and Breckenridge Jazz Hands.

Official League Records

Short joined the ILB as a player in the Shadows for the Seattle Garages with the Return of Blaseball.

During the Season β8 elections, Short joined the Yellowstone Magic's active roster in exchange for Terrell Bradley as a result of the Lottery Pick blessing. This made Short the first player to exit the Shadows to join the league as an active player.

On Season β10, Day 54, some of Short's hitting ability was siphoned by Charleston Shoe Thieves lineup player Richardson Games to add a Ball to the count in a game with Blooddrain weather.

During the Coffee Cup, Short played for Cream & Sugar United as a pitcher.

On Season β12, Day 1, during a game against the Canada Moist Talkers with star pitcher PolkaDot Patterson on the mound, Short accrued two Strikes, 112 Foul Balls, and one Ball before striking out looking at their first at-bat in the new era of Blaseball. By the end of the season, Short ended up breaking the record for most foul balls in a season with a total of 2345.[1] During the Season β12 elections, the Yellowstone Magic received the Summoning Circle blessing, which increased Short's batting from to .

During the Season β13 elections, all of Short's abilities increased by except for defense which increased as a result of the Magic's Infuse will.

During the Season β14 elections Election, Short's hitting was boosted to 4.3 as a result of the Precognition blessing. Short also gained the Homebody modification as a result of the Magic's Trust will.

On Season β15, Day 30, York Silk of the Baltimore Crabs hit a ground out to Short, causing Short to be Observed. Later, after play ended on Day 33, Short disappeared from the Magic's lineup, and they were Redacted. During the Season β15 elections, the Yellowstone Magic attempted to Plunder Short, but Short remained Redacted, and gained the Unstable modification as well.

On Season β16, Day 37, Short exited the Secret Base at the Crabitat, losing Redacted and gaining the Attractor modification. Upon being batted in by Mullen Peterson, Short joined the New York Millennials' bench.

During the Season β16 elections, Short joined the New York Millennials' active roster as a result of the Foreshadow will, becoming a pitcher in the process.

During the Season β17 elections, Short's Unstable modification was rerolled to Friend of Crows via the Millennials' Reform will. Short was then immediately traded to the Boston Flowers in exchange for Castillo Turner via the Millennials' Equivalent Exchange will.

During the Season β20 elections, Short was traded back to the New York Millennials in exchange for Castillo Turner as a result of the Flowers' Equivalent Exchange Will, becoming a lineup player in the process.

During the Season β21 elections, Short was traded back to the Boston Flowers in exchange for Castillo Turner as a result of the Millennials' Equivalent Exchange Will, becoming a pitcher in the process.

During the Season β22 elections, Short retreated to the Flowers' Shadows in exchange for Wade Howe as a result of the Flowers' Swap will. Short was then traded to the Hawai'i Fridays in exchange for Castillo Turner as a result of the Flowers' Equivalent Exchange will, becoming a lineup player in the process, before retreating again to the Flowers' Shadows as a result of the Flowers' Move will.

On Season β23, Day 3, Short rejoined the Flowers' pitching rotation in exchange for Dunn Keyes as a result of Boston Garden's Fax Machine. On Day 8, Short traded their Traitor Concrete Socks of Strength for Glabe Moon's The Fifth Base. On Day 9, Short then began super roaming.

After roaming four times, (to Millenials, Tigers, Steaks, and Jazz Hands respectively), the fifth base was stolen from Short by Tigers Pitcher Dunlap Figueroa on Season β23, Day 43, leaving Short playing for the Breckenridge Jazz Hands.

Short ended the Expansion Era with 5.6 in Batting, 5 in Pitching, 6.8 in Baserunning, and 4.5 in Defense. Short had Hard Shoes and the Homebody, Attractor, Friend of Crows, Triple Threat, and Underperforming modifications.

During the November 4, 2022 Fall Ball, Short fell to the Core Mechanics. On Season 1, Day 1 of the Return(s), Short became a pitcher for the Mechanics.

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Box of Chorby Short Files

Dust billows as the file box lands on the table. While many archives in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill are unified in some way, this... definitely isn’t one of them. The accompanying Rumor Registry explains all of the contents... wherever it is... but for now you grab the folder labelled IF-54.493 and start reading...

A Sweet Indefinite

Chorby Short was awakened by the Yellowstone Magic during the Season-8 Election Campfire and Music Festival in Seattle. She--the being has made it known that they prefer "she"--was discovered in a particularly anomalous region of Seattle, in a fugue-like state. Chorby showed a natural affinity for magical acts, and as the Team performed increasingly complicated spells, her now-normal upbeat attitude and erratic movement began to emerge.

Chorby has shown a strong affinity for pastel colors and soft fabric. She clothes herself in approximation of the Magical Girls she is fond of watching on television, and will often cast spells with alternative names to more closely mirror her idols. It is hypothesized that Chorby is very susceptible to the influence of media; a week-long binge of pro-wrestling and the Dragonball anime have permanently impacted Chorby's daily routine. For this reason, rangers closely monitor the media that she is allowed to access. Chorby exhibits psychosis-like symptoms in which she is unable to tell the difference between media and reality, and could be driven to unwittingly commit acts of harm. She has no traditional understanding of morality, her worldview shaped entirely by the examples in television, novels, and the radio. Chorby does not respond well to traditional teaching, nor real-world interaction. If a desired concept is to be taught, rangers apply for an animation to be made according to specially-prepared scripts.

In one notable incident, a lesson on anatomy was prepared by staff, without proper proofreading. The following day, Chorby was observed celebrating her dismemberment and dissection of several parkpark animals. Rangers approached Chorby for questioning, which resulted in [redacted]. The guidelines for media creation and interpersonal interaction with Chorby Short were drafted shortly thereafter.


Short, Surreal

Chorby Short is often described as frog-like. Indeed, she appears as a 106.6cm-tall humanoid with traits resembling an anthropomorphic member of the Order Anura. An incomplete list includes: broad mouth, elongated webbed digits, squat face, meter-long tongue, exaggerated leg-body proportions, moist green epidermis, vocal sac. Chorby has additionally demonstrated the ability to create an adhesive secretion.

Her stature and light voice sometimes seem at-odds with her demeanor, as exposure to media has allowed her to develop a sort of "protagonist focus" in which she becomes quite stoic and determined to complete whatever task she has fixated upon. When she is not in this state, her personality has been described as jovial. Chorby is easily excitable, and loves to run laps while she commandeers conversations.

The most concerning part of Chorby's physiology is an adherence to what rangers have named "Toon-Physics." Her body is seemingly immune to physical harm, and able to alter shape according to stimuli. Chorby Short is unable to feel pain, but reports a discomfort when misshapen. Despite the light-hearted nomenclature, the reality of Chorby's physical changes are often quite gruesome: viscera, blood, and bone are often seen leaving the flesh, or becoming violently misshapen before returning to their established shape. Chorby has sometimes used this trait for means other than survival, such as flattening and extruding herself beneath a locked door.

Fan Works

Fanfiction

For more fanfiction, see the Chorby Short tag on AO3.

References

  1. ↑ Ifh-Biff, the Data Efreet (March 5, 2021). "The Chorby Short Pitch Count Charts of Season 12". Archived.


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