Aldon Cashmoney

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Revision as of 19:10, 21 September 2020 by Qwo (talk | contribs)

Aldon Cashmoney is a lineup player for the Hawaii Fridays. Cashmoney joined the league with the Breckenridge Jazz Hands during Season 1 and was traded to the Fridays during the Season 7 Elections.

Official League Records

In the playoffs of Postseason 2, Day 104 against the Hades Tigers, the Jazz Hands were down 4-3 against the Tigers. Jazz Hands player Comfort Septemberish successfully stole home in the bottom of the 9th inning, bringing the score to a 4-4 tie. Cashmoney then hit a 2-run home run on the following pitch, securing victory for the Jazz Hands with a final score of 6-4, advancing the team to the next stage of the playoffs.

Season 7

At the end of Season 7, Cashmoney was traded to the Hawaii Fridays for Elijah Valenzuela through the Popular by Association blessing.

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Personality & Appearance

Cashmoney is known for only hitting triples, as per vis namesake. Ve has become a role model for many younger Jazz Hands fans, as they strive to make their behavior in life a little more Cashmoney.

Cashmoney wears the jersey number $1,000,000. Vis hair is made of money.

History

Debut

When first joining the ILB, Cashmoney was known for vis love of material pleasures. Ve often spent large sums of money on fancy meals and expensive vacations, and maintained a large violin collection despite typically only playing vis Stradivarius. Despite this, ve was not known for being particularly insufferable; ve would readily cover friends' meals, made regular donations to charity, and bought many gifts for vis teammates. When asked to describe Cashmoney in an interview, Bevan Underbuck replied, "Oh, vim? I mean, ve's really just a vimbo. A wealthy vimbo, but still a kind-hearted vimbo, through and through."

Open Mic Night

During the Jazz Hands' Open Mic Night, Cashmoney was confronted with the changeover of many teammates in rapid succession. After the Feedback of Hendricks Richardson and Randall Marijuana, ve said in an interview, "Nothing against the new folks, but things just really aren't the same. I'm sure I'll get used to it in time, but I'll miss Comfort's jingle-shouting all the same." Ve refused interviews after both Marijuana's incineration and the third trade of Nagomi Mcdaniel for Holden Stanton, and ve stopped going to vis regular restaurants or vacation destinations. Many attribute vis poor performance in Season 7 to the high emotional toll Cashmoney experienced during Open Mic Night.

Gallery