Rodriguez Internet

Rodriguez Internet
Basic Information
Team	Kansas City Breath Mints
Status	Active
Batting
Pitching
Defense
Running
Modifications	AlternateThis Player is an Alternate... Player is replaced with an alternate reality version, stats are randomized.  Fire EaterFire Eaters swallow fire instead of being incinerated.  RepeatingIn Reverb Weather, this player will Repeat. A Repeating player will bat again after getting a hit.
Dates Active	Jul 20, 2020–present
External Links	Blaseball-Reference Player Changes Player Page
Personal Information
Item	None
Armor	None
Evolution	Base
Pregame Ritual	Crystals
Coffee Style	Plenty of Sugar
Blood Type	Love
Fate	29
Soulscream	AIAEOAIAEOAIIOIEIIOIEIEUOEHEUOEHEUOOAEUOOAEUXIAEOXIAEOXHOIIUHOIIUHIHAAHIHAAHIAXEIXAXEIXAEOIUHEOIUHE
Biographical Details
Pronouns	He/They
Nickname(s)	Rod.Net
Species	World Wide Web

Rodriguez Internet is a lineup player for the Kansas City Breath Mints. Internet has played for the Breath Mints since Season 1.

Official League Record

On Season 3, Day 13, Internet suffered an allergic reaction from a stray peanut, which decreased their batting and defense by ★½ and pitching and baserunning by ★.

At the end of Season 4, Internet was affected by the Alternate Reality Decree, which replaced him with an alternate reality version, randomizing his stats.

During the Season 9 election, Internet received the Fire Eater modification due to the passing of the Forecast: Eclipse decree.

During the Season 10 election, Internet received the Repeating modification due to the Breath Mints winning the Rogue Waves blessing.

During the Coffee Cup, Internet played for Royal PoS as a lineup player.

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

History

Internet's perceivable form is constructed of several ASCII characters artfully pieced together into the shape of a very kind and talented Blaseball player. In his current form he appears stuck at only dial-up speeds, however, Kansas City's high speed fiber-optic internet may unlock his full potential.

As a personification of the internet itself, the playfully nicknamed "Rod.Net" is well known for his quick thinking and love of cat pictures. Some fans have reportedly seen him keeping a small plush cat on a keychain around his belt, though none can seem to agree as to what the cat looks like. When asked to present the keychain during interviews, Internet consistently laughs to themself before informing the reporter that the alleged feline is "a bit camera shy."

Internet is also known to wear JNCO jeans, both in regular blue and a custom made mint green, which they swear are his secret to being a good player. More often than not, however, it's theorized that this leads to him getting caught stealing more than anything, though Internet has been yet to be seen tripping on their jeans in his day to day life.

After Season 4, Internet was replaced by a doppleganger, nicknamed instead "Rod.Com". At a glance the two appear almost identical, but there are subtle differences between the two.

Original Rodriguez Internet's walk-out music was "Spybreak!" by English electronic duo Propellerheads. Alternate reality Internet's preferred walk-up music is a 15 second unskippable ad. This new Internet always waits for the entire ad to be over before he starts swinging, often resulting in several strikes.

Alternate Internet likes to hand out cookies to fans between at-bats, and then obsessively checks on the status of said cookies throughout the game (and even at future games if he recognizes the fans).

Abilities

• Very good at recommending gift ideas (often unsolicited).
• Uses pop-up ads to deflect pop flys into his glove.
• Experiences lag while base-running, making him easier to tag out.
• His power increases based on how many fans like and subscribe.

Fan Art

Fan Sites

• IMROD.NET by Discord user Haman#1342

Gallery

• 

  Mini-Blaseballer by @HetreaSky

• 

  One of Internet's early fan discs by HotSliceOfJesus

• 

  ROD.NET pixel card by Discord user bugvsbug#7475

• 

  Rod.net by @solphy

• 

  Rodriguez Internet card by @breakurfall

• 

  Rodriguez Internet by @8loi88

• 

  Rodriguez Internet card by Discord user Haman#1342

• 

  "Rod.com" by Discord user MikeGronstal#0851

• 

  Low-poly Rod.Net by Discord user Numbersninja#7987

• 

  Low-poly Rod.Net (Death Mints skin) by Discord user Numbersninja#7987