Simon Haley

Simon Haley
Simon Haley Tlopps card by @Spiral_Joe Logo by @LonghairQ, Original Design by @ Avery Helm
Basic Information
Team	Charleston Shoe Thieves
Former Team(s)	Canada Moist Talkers
Status	Active
Batting
Pitching
Defense
Running
Modifications	FlinchHitters with Flinch cannot swing until a strike has been thrown in the At Bat.  SoundproofPlayer: This Player cannot be caught in Feedback's reality flickers. Team: Players on this Team cannot be caught in Feedback's reality flickers. See also: Glossary
External Links	Blaseball-Reference Player Changes Player Page
Personal Information
Item	None
Armor	Noise-Cancelling Headphones
Evolution	Base
Pregame Ritual	Rain dance
Coffee Style	Decaf
Blood Type	AA
Fate	63
Soulscream	XEEEAXEEEAXOEAHAOEAHAOEOAAAEOAAAEIOAAAIOAAAIEHAAIEHAAIEAXIEIAXIEIA
Biographical Details
Pronouns	Any
Nickname(s)	"The Comet"
Species	Comet
Personal Relationships
Rival(s)	The Shelled One

Simon Haley is a lineup player for the Charleston Shoe Thieves, and has been with the team since Season 8.

Official League Records

Haley entered the league on the Canada Moist Talkers as a replacement for Trevino Merrit after Merrit's incineration during Season 2.

On Day 8 of Season 3, Haley consumed a stray peanut and had an allergic reaction. Haley's hitting rank dropped from to

On Day 44 of Season 8, Haley switched to the Shoe Thieves in a feedback event with Eugenia Garbage.

On Day 7 of Season 10, Haley hit the first recorded pentaslam (5-run home run) and found the 5-Blood Blagonball.

In the Season 10 elections, Haley received Noise-Cancelling Headphones, becoming Soundproof.

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Blaseball Career

Achievements

Simon was voted ILB Rookie of the Year by fan vote at the end of Season 2. They are the first player to receive this award.

Personal Life

Simon Haley is rumored to be the lovechild of 18th Century English astronomer Edmond Halley and the short-period comet 1P/Halley, conceived sometime following Edmond Halley's death in 1742.

Haley came down to the Moist Talkers from on high after Trevino Merritt's incineration, and was chosen to take Merrit's place after they displayed much of the same batting and running prowess as their predecessor had.

After his unfortunate peanut reaction in Season 3, Haley has devoted himself to his Anti-Peanut advocacy charity, the Peanut Defamation League.

Trivia

• His birthday is July 12, 1986
• Haley is a Type 1 Diabetic and has an insulin pump
• Their favourite skittles are the green ones

Gallery

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  Simon Haley Tlopps card by @Spiral_Joe Logo by @LonghairQ, Original Design by @ Avery Helm