Difference between revisions of "Esme Ramsey"

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{{Player
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{{NewAutomatedPlayer
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|image1=Grr ramsey.png
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|image1= The color people like god or the color people like crayola?.png
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|caption1=Esme Ramsey art by Discord user grr
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|caption1= Art by [https://twitter.com/desmodusrotunds/status/1513644698212225033 '''Jace''']
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|team=[[Charleston Shoe Thieves]]
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|former= [[Charleston Shoe Thieves]]
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|former=
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|dates= Jul 20, 2020–present
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|status=Active
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|fielding_position= Longstop
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|dates=Jul 20, 2020–present
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|shoe_specialty= Antique Diving Boots
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|modifications={{Modif|flinch}}<br />{{Modif|haunted}}<br />{{Modif|noise-cancelling headphones}}
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|species= Ostensibly Human
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|batting={{Star Rating|3.5}}
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|pronouns= She/Her, They/Them
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|pitching={{Star Rating|3.5}}
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|sexuality= Lesbian
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|baserunning={{Star Rating|2.0}}
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|relations= [[Velasquez Meadows]], [[Sandoval Crossing]], & [[Rhys Trombone]] (parents)<br/>[[Randall Marijuana]] (brother)
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|defense={{Star Rating|4.0}}
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|nickname= Ez, Ezzy, "Queen of Walkies"
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|item=None
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|horse= No
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|armor=Noise-Cancelling Headphones
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|likes= Long walks, gourmet splorts paraphernalia
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|evolution=Base
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|dislikes= [[Tillman Henderson]]
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|ritual=Running the bases
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|uuid= b8ab86c6-9054-4832-9b96-508dbd4eb624
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|coffee=Americano
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}}
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|blood=Psychic
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'''{{PAGENAME}}''' is a player for the [[Houston Spies]], and has been with the team since [[Fall Ball]]. Ramsey has previously played for the [[Charleston Shoe Thieves]].
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|fate=23
 
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|soulscream=XEAHUXEAHUXEIAAAEIAAAEIIEOUIIEOUIXOAUXXOAUXXHIIIEHIIIEH
 
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|position=Longstop
 
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|shoe_specialty=Antique Diving Boots
 
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|species=Unknown (current)<br/>Human (former)
 
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|pronouns=She/Her, They/Them
 
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|sexuality=Lesbian
 
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|relations=[[Velasquez Alstott]] (friend)<br/>[[Workman Gloom]] (friend)<br/>[[Beasley Gloom]] (former ward) [[Jessica Telephone]] (girlfriend)
 
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|nickname=Ez, Ezzy, "Queen of Walkies"
 
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|horse=No
 
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|likes=Long walks, gourmet splorts paraphernalia
 
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|dislikes=[[Tillman Henderson]]
 
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|player_twitter=
 
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|uuid =b8ab86c6-9054-4832-9b96-508dbd4eb624
 
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|peanut_allergy=Allergic}}
 
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'''{{PAGENAME}}''' is a lineup player for the [[Charleston Shoe Thieves]], and has been with the team since [[Season 1]].
 
  
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__FORCETOC__
 
 
==Official League Records==
 
==Official League Records==
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Ramsey joined the [[ILB]] as a lineup player for the [[Charleston Shoe Thieves]] with {{BetaSeason|1| the Return of Blaseball}}.
  
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As of the end of [[Season 11]], Esme Ramsey holds the record for most career walks in Blaseball at 433. Only one other player, [[Richardson Games]], has over 400 career walks.
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During the {{BetaSeason|6#Election Results|@ elections}}, the Charleston Shoe Thieves received the {{BetaSeason|6#Blessings 2|Mutually Arising blessing}} increasing Ramsey's overall stars from {{Star Change|8.9|9.4}}.
  
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In the [[Season 6#Election Results|Season 6 elections]], Ramsey's batting, baserunning and defense each increased by ½ a star as a part of the Charleston Shoe Thieves' '''Mutually Arising''' blessing.
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On [[Day X#Season 9|Season 9, Day X]], Ramsey gained the {{ModLink|Flinch}} modification after the Shoe Thieves lost to [[THE SHELLED ONE'S PODS]].
  
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On [[Season 10]], Day 63, some of Ramsey's defensive ability was siphoned by [[Spears Taylor]], dropping it from {{Star Rating|4}} to {{Star Rating|3.5}}.
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In the {{BetaSeason|10#Blessings 2|@ elections}}, Ramsey gained the {{ModLink|Haunted}} modification from the {{BetaSeason|10#Blessings|'''Haunted'''}} blessing. Additionally, along with the rest of the Shoe Thieves, Ramsey received {{BetaSeason|10#Blessings|'''Noise-Cancelling Headphones'''}}, becoming {{ModLink|Soundproof}}. (The Headphones would later be lost, along with all other [[Discipline Era]] items across the league, at the beginning of {{BetaSeason|15}}.)
  
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On Season 10, Day 69, Ramsey siphoned some of [[Ruslan Greatness]]'s baserunning ability, bringing it from {{Star Rating|0.5}} to {{Star Rating|1}}.
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During the [[Coffee Cup]], Ramsey played for the [[Americano Water Works]] as a lineup player.
  
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On Season 10, Day 78, some of Ramsey's defensive ability was siphoned by [[Cory Ross]], dropping it from {{Star Rating|3.5}} to {{Star Rating|3}}.
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During the {{BetaSeason|16#Election Results|@ elections}}, Ramsey gained the {{ModLink|Earlbirds}} modification via the {{BetaSeason|16#Blessings|'''Early Riser'''}} blessing.
  
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In the [[Season 10#Blessings 2|Season 10 elections]], Ramsey gained the [[Modifications|Haunted modification]] from the [[Season 10#Blessings|blessing of the same name]]. Additionally, along with the rest of the Shoe Thieves, Ramsey received '''Noise-Cancelling Headphones''', becoming [[Modifications|Soundproof]].
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During the {{BetaSeason|18#Election Results|@ elections}}, Ramsey's {{ModLink|Haunted}} modification was changed into the {{ModLink|Flippers}} modification by the Shoe Thieves' {{BetaSeason|18#Wills|'''Reform'''}} will.
  
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During the [[Coffee Cup]], Ramsey played for the [[Americano Water Works]] as a lineup player.
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During the {{BetaSeason|22#Election Results|@ elections}}, Ramsey gained the {{ModLink|Subtractor}} modification as a result of the {{BetaSeason|22#Blessings|'''Subtractor Avoidance'''}} blessing.
  
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During the November 25, 2022 [[Fall Ball]], Ramsey fell to the [[Houston Spies]].
 
{{Community Lore}}
 
{{Community Lore}}
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==Family and History==
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At a young age, Esme Ramsey moved to Moab, Utah with {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} adoptive father, [[Velasquez Meadows]]. By the time {{RandomPronoun|lower|subject|could|could|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} remember, the two of them had moved in with Meadows' boyfriends [[Sandoval Crossing]] and [[Rhys Trombone]] who quickly became the other two of her three dads. Ramsey grew up in a loving household as an only child until high school, when {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} dads suddenly took in {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} younger brother, [[Randall Marijuana]], after his mysterious arrival. As soon as the initial fascination with the weird kid that came to town alone on a bus died down, Ramsey adjusted quickly to being an older sibling and all that it entailed.
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While in school, Ramsey made good friends with [[Zack Sanders]]. The two played on the same blaseball team together, spending afternoons throwing rocks at Marijuana's friend [[Emmett Internet]], and evenings eating pizza and watching movies in Ramsey’s room.<ref>The Crossing-Trombone-Meadows family has noted that Sanders would spend more time at Ramsey's house than her own.</ref> Ramsey was also an avid baker, and after high school {{RandomPronoun|lower|subject|headed|headed|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} off to culinary school to pursue this passion. Ramsey has shared few stories of {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} time at culinary school, but while home for Spring Break {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} first year {{RandomPronoun|lower|subject|drank|drank|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} from a pool of {{Deadlink|primordial malice|Primordial Malice}}<ref>Allegedly, to impress a [[Zack Sanders|woman]] {{RandomPronoun|lower|subject|was|were|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} dating at the time.</ref> and reportedly witnessed the [[First Pitch]].<ref>Or an approximation thereof.</ref> There has been no confirmation if there were further side effects.
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After finishing culinary school, Ramsey returned to Moab for a short time before feeling inexplicably drawn to join the fledgling Shoe Thieves while {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} family signed up to play for the [[Hellmouth Sunbeams|Moab Sunbeams]].
  
 
==Blaseball Career==
 
==Blaseball Career==
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===Pre-ILB===
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Ramsey established {{RandomPronoun|lower|reflexive|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} early as a reliable hitter, going as far as being named the team's MVP in {{BetaSeason|2}} due to {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} consistency and high RBI count. Ramsey plays the little-known defensive position of "longstop", a variant of the more commonly used shortstop that places the player almost entirely in left field. This allows Ramsey to share batting tips and spare blueberry muffins with left-fielder [[Velazquez Alstott]] while also being able to see approximately two seconds into the future.
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Ramsey first encountered Blaseball while drinking from a pool of primordial malice (allegedly, to impress a woman they were dating at the time) and witnessing the [[First Pitch]] (or an approximation thereof). This created an irresistible compulsion to play Blaseball, and despite having no prior experience with the splort, Ramsey could consistently be found clinging to the fence outside [[Hellmouth Sunbeams]] (then the [[Moab]] Sunbeams) games and attempting to ingest stray balls. This determination ultimately proved appealing to the Sunbeams, who brought Ramsey on as a member of the roster. The batter served admirably for several years before being released as a free agent, after which Ramsey felt inexplicably drawn to the fledgling Shoe Thieves.  
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A turbulent {{BetaSeason|4}} for the Shoe Thieves left them looking hopefully to the season's election, paying particularly close attention to the [[Items/Discipline Era#Grappling Hook|Grappling Hook]] that was up for grabs, which would be incredibly useful to the team both in and out of the game. At Ramsey's suggestion, the lineup drew straws to determine who would receive the hook if they won the blessing. Ramsey supposedly won the contest, despite calls of "foul play" {{cite}} from all other participants. In the end, the Shoe Thieves ''did'' manage to snag the blessing, but new arrival to the team [[Richardson Games]] managed to steal it out from under {{RandomPronoun|lower|object|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}}; an impressive feat when the entire team had theft down to an art. However, this has not stopped Ramsey from referring to the grappling hook as {{RandomPronoun|lower|adjective|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} every chance that {{RandomPronoun|lower|subject|gets|get|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}}.
  
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===Career with the Shoe Thieves===
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In {{BetaSeason|9}}, the Shoe Thieves had a remarkably successful season ending with an underdog championship win against the powerhouse [[Baltimore Crabs]]. The celebration was quickly cut short when Ramsey and the rest of {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} team were pulled into a game against the [[THE SHELLED ONE'S PODS]]. Whether outmatched in skill or simply exhausted from winning the Internet Series, the Shoe Thieves lost the game and the whole team was thrown back to the immaterial plane, beaten, battered, and [[Curses|Cursed]].
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Ramsey has proved to be a reliable hitter, going as far as winning the team's MVP award for Postseason 2 due to their consistency and high RBI count. Ramsey plays the little-known defensive position of "longstop", a variant of the more commonly used shortstop that places the player almost entirely in left field. This allows Ramsey to give batting tips and spare blueberry muffins to left-fielder [[Velazquez Alstott]], as well as to see approximately two seconds into the future.
 
  
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During the siesta following [[Season 3]], Ramsey began dabbling in mechanical tinkering and blood magic. During an interview conducted several months prior to the start of [[Season 4|Season 4,]] Ramsey showed off a work-in-progress of what they described as an [[Legendary Items|"accursed grappling hook,"]] which they claimed to have created with the use of their own blood. When questioned further, they reported the volume of blood used as being "around a cup and a half," and gave no justification for their new hobby beyond "Boredom."
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===An Unwitting Medium===
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Just when Ramsey thought the stress of {{BetaSeason|10}} was over after dealing with [[Curses#Flinch|Flinch]], the Shoe Thieves' surprising Internet Series appearance, their near escape from a second showdown with the THE SHELLED ONE'S PODS, and {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} front row seat to [[Day X]], the {{BetaSeason|10#Election Results|@ elections}} left {{RandomPronoun|lower|object|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} [[Haunted]]. The whole team was shocked when Day 1 of {{BetaSeason|11}}, deceased Shoe Thief [[Atlas Jonbois]] inhabited Ramsey for a chance to step up to the plate once again. Jonbois apparently had so much fun with it that they came back again on Day 5 &mdash; the first player from the [[Hall of Flame]] to haunt twice.  
  
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During the Season 4 finals, the finished grappling hook was stolen from Ramsey's locker by recent Shoe Thieves addition [[Richardson Games]]. Regarding the theft, then-teammate [[Antonio Wallace]] disclosed that “the rest of us all know better than to root through Esme’s stuff, and I don’t think Dickson took it seriously when they told him the thing drinks blood. But hey, live and learn and all that.” When asked how they intended to respond to the theft of their wretched contraption, Ramsey responded, “I'm gonna point and laugh.”
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Ramsey adjusted remarkably well to being haunted, possibly in part due to the guidance of {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} psychopomp [[Velasquez Meadows|dad]], whom {{RandomPronoun|lower|subject|had|had|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} a long private conversation with following their first haunting on Day 46. For eight seasons Ramsey remained haunted, being inhabited over 1,000 times, before an unexpectedly having {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} ghosts traded for [[Flippers]] during the {{BetaSeason|18#Election Results|@ elections}}. {{RandomPronoun|upper|possessive|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} only comments after the reform were noting that "it's very quiet" and that {{RandomPronoun|lower|subject|could|could|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} "think of a few different uses for these flippers."
  
 
==Personal Life==
 
==Personal Life==
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[[Velasquez Alstott]] and Ramsey have a close relationship, with Ramsey frequently seen giving Alstott piggy back rides around the field and Alstott referring to Ramsey and "Big Ems".
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Upon first moving to Charleston, Ramsey was surprised to discover that [[Forrest Bookbaby]], a fellow Moab resident who was several years {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} senior, had also joined the team. Bookbaby had been one of {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} babysitters when {{RandomPronoun|lower|subject|was|were|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} younger and had even tutored {{RandomPronoun|lower|object|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} in algebra, so it wasn't surprising to learn that he had been signed up to be the Shoe Thieves' accountant. Despite all of this, they didn't talk much about their shared childhood and several teammates were unaware that they even knew each other prior to joining the ILB. Most only learned of this after Bookbaby was transferred to the [[Philly Pies]].
  
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[[File:Joshmillard--watch-your-step.mp3|thumb|right|The Esme Ramsey Quartet's rendition of You Better Watch Your Step]]Ramsey also plays jazz stand-up bass and sings in the Esme Ramsey Quartet, along with [[Joe Voorhees]] (piano), [[Gunther O'Brian]] (drums), and [[Antonio Wallace]] (ribcage xylophone).
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Ramsey became fast friends with [[Morrow Doyle]] and [[Workman Gloom]], being similar in age and all sharing a legitimate fondness for blaseball. The three were quite the unit, frequently found planning heists over a plate of Ramsey’s famous snickerdoodles, at the batting cages, or requisitioning the clubhouse TV to watch ''Jeoplardy'' and ''Wheel of Flortune'' together.
  
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After [[Workman Gloom]] was transferred to the [[Canada Moist Talkers]] and incinerated in [[Season 7]], Ramsey took over primary care of [[Beasley Gloom]]. Before Workman's incineration, Ramsey managed to nab their hat, which she then gave to Beasley Gloom to comfort him in his time of sorrow. Ramsey takes Beasley Gloom for lots of walks and makes sure he knows he is a very good boy.
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After Gloom feedbacked to the [[Canada Moist Talkers]] in {{BetaSeason|4}}, Ramsey took over primary care of their dog, [[Beasley Gloom]]<ref>With the help of new teammate [[Joe Voorhees]].</ref> until he was subsequently traded to the Talkers as well in {{BetaSeason|9}}. While in Ramsey’s care, {{RandomPronoun|lower|subject|took|took|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} him for lots of walks, and made sure he knew he was a very good boy.
  
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When [[Howell Franklin]] joined the Shoe Thieves, Ramsey welcomed the werewolf by taking them on their first heist. The pair bonded over the experience and it is rumored that they could be heard celebrating their victory from the rooftops, howling at the moon.
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[[File:Joshmillard--watch-your-step.mp3|thumb|right|The Esme Ramsey Quartet's rendition of "You Better Watch Your Step"]]Ramsey plays jazz stand-up bass and sings in the Esme Ramsey Quartet which {{RandomPronoun|lower|subject|started|started|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} with some of {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} fellow Shoe Thieves &mdash; a passtime likely inspired by growing up with a [[Rhys Trombone|dad]] that had a strong appreciation for jazz, and occasional performances with {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} school's jazz band as a vocalist. Original members of the quartet included [[Joe Voorhees]] (piano), [[Gunther O'Brian]] (drums), and [[Antonio Wallace]] (ribcage xylophone). Over the years as players have left the team, the Quartet membership has changed, but Ramsey and Voorhees have always been constants.  
  
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===Cult Following===
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When not partaking in blaseball-related activities, Ramsey divides her time between {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} apartment in Charleston and back home in [[Hellmouth (town)|Hellmouth]] visiting {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} [[Sandoval Crossing|dad]]. {{RandomPronoun|upper|subject|can|can|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} often be found in the kitchen, working {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} way through a stack of recipe cards from the league's fellow bakers or
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Due to their revelatory experience witnessing the First Pitch, several philosophical and religious organizations view Ramsey as a conduit for divine truth, including the [[Alliance of Gnostic Blaseball Historians]], the [[Imperial Low Council of Bavaria]], the [[Sisters of Shattering]] and the [[New Sandford Ramseyians]]. For the majority of their career Ramsey declined all requests for comment on their popularity with such groups, but midway through Season 4 they responded to a reporter's query on the subject in a post-game interview:<blockquote>Look, I've seen the beginning and end of everything, I've stared directly into the blinding visage of the being that threw the First Pitch, I've seen the entirety of time and space laid out before me like a cheap hotel continental breakfast buffet. And you know what? Last game I struck out twice, my team has a losing record, and one of our best players just transferred to the [[Canada Moist Talkers|Wet Faces]] or whatever. None of it matters. We're all gonna die. You either eat [expletive deleted] or play ball. I'm gonna play ball.</blockquote>
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<choose uncached>
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<option>deep diving in the waters of Sunken Charleston for antique diving boots.</option>
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===Disputed Inheritance Claim===
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<option>writing poetry.<ref>A hobby Ramsey vehemently denies having.</ref></option>
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Ramsey claims to be Gordon Ramsey's illegitimate child. This claim is substantiated by the fact that Ramsey is [[Choux Stadium]]'s preeminent patissier. However, Gordon has no knowledge of Ramsey's existence, and is entirely unable to answer questions regarding the batter.
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<option>listening to her collection of jazz on vinyl.<ref>Inherited from Trombone after their incineration.</ref></option>
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<option>meticulously managing {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} households in ''The Silms.''</option>
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<option>maintaining {{RandomPronoun|lower|possessive|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Lonestarlars/pronountable.she.they}}}} aquarium full of baby bamboo shrimplets.</option>
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</choose>
  
 
===Quotes===
 
===Quotes===
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*On their relationship status: "One Time a fan asked me to marry her. I said she can do whatever she wants. I think there was a priest there? It's whatever."
 
 
*On cooking tips: "It's easier to fit the ball in your mouth if you cut it in half first." Also: "I learned this technique in culinary school. It's called 'digestion'."
 
*On cooking tips: "It's easier to fit the ball in your mouth if you cut it in half first." Also: "I learned this technique in culinary school. It's called 'digestion'."
 
*On fashion: "Why are you speaking to me?"
 
*On fashion: "Why are you speaking to me?"
 
*On preferred pronouns: "Who gave you permission to refer to me at all?"
 
*On preferred pronouns: "Who gave you permission to refer to me at all?"
 +
*On Blaseball: <blockquote>Look, I've seen the beginning and end of everything, I've stared directly into the blinding visage of the being that threw the First Pitch, I've seen the entirety of time and space laid out before me like a cheap hotel continental breakfast buffet. And you know what? Last game I struck out twice, my team has a losing record, and one of our best players just transferred to the [[Canada Moist Talkers|Wet Faces]] or whatever. None of it matters. We're all gonna die. You either eat [expletive deleted] or play ball. I'm gonna play ball.</blockquote>
  
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==Gallery==
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==Fan Works==
 
<gallery widths="185">
 
<gallery widths="185">
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File:Grr ramsey.png|Esme Ramsey art by Discord user grr
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File:Grr ramsey.png|Esme Ramsey<br />by Discord user grr
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File:120EsmeRamsey.png|Mini-Blaseballer by {{Twitter|name=HetreaSky}}
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File:120EsmeRamsey.png|Mini-Blaseballer<br />by [http://miniblaseball.surge.sh/ '''@HetreaSky''']
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File:Esme Bat.jpg|tlopps card by {{Twitter|name=johannagaudet}}
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File:Esme Bat.jpg|Tlopps card<br />by {{Twitter|name=johannagaudet}}
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File:Esme ramsey goblin.png|By {{Twitter|name=glassgoblin}}
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File:Home 4 the holidays.jpg|alt=A drawing of Sandoval Crossing of the Hellmouth Sunbeams and Esme Ramsey of the Charleston Shoe Thieves. Sandy is a person with tan skin, fluffy white hair and beard, one brown eye, and one eye with sunlight in it. Sandy is dressed in a crossing guard vest. Esme is a person with medium brown skin, dark brown afro-textured hair, and dark brown eyes. Esme is wearing a blue hoodie with shoelace drawstrings and three silver earrings in her left ear. Esme is leaning on Sandy who has their arm around her. They are sitting on a yellow couch looking at a picture book of Esme when she was little. Around them is are items representing past and present teammates: a radio and blue and white lamp, a bookshelf with a pink book series, a silver sign that says "Romayne's Romayne", a shield made to look like a stop sign, a picture of Randall Marijuana, a red demon boy with green hair, and Emmett Internet, a person with a computer screen head with a blue screen and digital face, in their blue Hall Stars uniforms, and a picture of the Season 11 Hellmouth Sunbeams championship roster with a plaque above that labels it.|Ramsey & [[Sandoval Crossing]]<br />by [https://twitter.com/_iznj/status/1355964378944839684 '''@_iznj''']
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File:Jessme.png|Esme and Jessica Telephone, by [https://solphy.tumblr.com/ @solphy]
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File:Esme ramsey goblin.png|by [https://twitter.com/glassgoblin/status/1324033672597692422 '''@glassgoblin''']
 +
File:Ooh she cookin 👩🏾‍🍳.jpg|alt=A drawing of Esme Ramsey. Esme has medium-dark skin and a large dark brown afro. She is wearing a dark blue apron with a blue and gold sun and moon design respectively, oven mitts, and not matching dangling earrings, one is the word \"jazz\" in bright pink, capital letters and the other is a gold saxophone. She is holding a tray of cookies. The background is plain blue.|by [https://twitter.com/_iznj/status/1434278670164709384 '''@_iznj''']
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File:The color people like god or the color people like crayola?.png|alt=A digital drawing of Esme Ramsey. They are a Black woman squatting and leaning against a yellow bat and holding a pair of yellow shoes by their strings. She is wearing a green, yellow and blue pinstripe jersey and dark green pants. She has long, dark and curly brown hair and gold ram horns.|by [https://twitter.com/desmodusrotunds/status/1513644698212225033 '''Jace''']
 +
File:Jessme.png|Esme and [[Jessica Telephone]]<br />by {{Twitter|name=viciathief}}
 +
File:Kaylee rowena - haunted house esme.png|Haunted Esme by {{Twitter|name=kayleerowena}}
 
</gallery>
 
</gallery>
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==References==
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{{TeamNavSelector|shoe thieves}}
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<references />
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{{TeamCategorySelector|shoe thieves}}
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{{AutomatedPlayerNav|b8ab86c6-9054-4832-9b96-508dbd4eb624|Houston Spies}}
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{{FormerTeamCategorySelector}}
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{{FormerTeamCategorySelector|Shoe Thieves}}
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[[Category:Original Players]]
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[[Category:Players]]
 
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[[Category:Lineup Players]]
 
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[[Category:Surviving original players]]
 
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[[Category:Charleston Shoe Thieves surviving original players]]
 
 
[[Category:Americano Water Works]]
 
[[Category:Americano Water Works]]

Latest revision as of 03:56, 23 June 2023

Esme Ramsey is a player for the Houston Spies, and has been with the team since Fall Ball. Ramsey has previously played for the Charleston Shoe Thieves.

Official League Records

Ramsey joined the ILB as a lineup player for the Charleston Shoe Thieves with the Return of Blaseball.

During the Season β6 elections, the Charleston Shoe Thieves received the Mutually Arising blessing increasing Ramsey's overall stars from 8.9 → 9.4 .

On Season 9, Day X, Ramsey gained the Flinch modification after the Shoe Thieves lost to THE SHELLED ONE'S PODS.

In the Season β10 elections, Ramsey gained the Haunted modification from the Haunted blessing. Additionally, along with the rest of the Shoe Thieves, Ramsey received Noise-Cancelling Headphones, becoming Soundproof. (The Headphones would later be lost, along with all other Discipline Era items across the league, at the beginning of Season β15.)

During the Coffee Cup, Ramsey played for the Americano Water Works as a lineup player.

During the Season β16 elections, Ramsey gained the Earlbirds modification via the Early Riser blessing.

During the Season β18 elections, Ramsey's Haunted modification was changed into the Flippers modification by the Shoe Thieves' Reform will.

During the Season β22 elections, Ramsey gained the Subtractor modification as a result of the Subtractor Avoidance blessing.

During the November 25, 2022 Fall Ball, Ramsey fell to the Houston Spies.

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Family and History

At a young age, Esme Ramsey moved to Moab, Utah with her adoptive father, Velasquez Meadows. By the time they could remember, the two of them had moved in with Meadows' boyfriends Sandoval Crossing and Rhys Trombone who quickly became the other two of her three dads. Ramsey grew up in a loving household as an only child until high school, when their dads suddenly took in their younger brother, Randall Marijuana, after his mysterious arrival. As soon as the initial fascination with the weird kid that came to town alone on a bus died down, Ramsey adjusted quickly to being an older sibling and all that it entailed.

While in school, Ramsey made good friends with Zack Sanders. The two played on the same blaseball team together, spending afternoons throwing rocks at Marijuana's friend Emmett Internet, and evenings eating pizza and watching movies in Ramsey’s room.[1] Ramsey was also an avid baker, and after high school she headed off to culinary school to pursue this passion. Ramsey has shared few stories of their time at culinary school, but while home for Spring Break their first year they drank from a pool of primordial malice[2] and reportedly witnessed the First Pitch.[3] There has been no confirmation if there were further side effects.

After finishing culinary school, Ramsey returned to Moab for a short time before feeling inexplicably drawn to join the fledgling Shoe Thieves while her family signed up to play for the Moab Sunbeams.

Blaseball Career

Ramsey established themself early as a reliable hitter, going as far as being named the team's MVP in Season β2 due to her consistency and high RBI count. Ramsey plays the little-known defensive position of "longstop", a variant of the more commonly used shortstop that places the player almost entirely in left field. This allows Ramsey to share batting tips and spare blueberry muffins with left-fielder Velazquez Alstott while also being able to see approximately two seconds into the future.

A turbulent Season β4 for the Shoe Thieves left them looking hopefully to the season's election, paying particularly close attention to the Grappling Hook that was up for grabs, which would be incredibly useful to the team both in and out of the game. At Ramsey's suggestion, the lineup drew straws to determine who would receive the hook if they won the blessing. Ramsey supposedly won the contest, despite calls of "foul play" [citation needed] from all other participants. In the end, the Shoe Thieves did manage to snag the blessing, but new arrival to the team Richardson Games managed to steal it out from under them; an impressive feat when the entire team had theft down to an art. However, this has not stopped Ramsey from referring to the grappling hook as theirs every chance that they get.

In Season β9, the Shoe Thieves had a remarkably successful season ending with an underdog championship win against the powerhouse Baltimore Crabs. The celebration was quickly cut short when Ramsey and the rest of her team were pulled into a game against the THE SHELLED ONE'S PODS. Whether outmatched in skill or simply exhausted from winning the Internet Series, the Shoe Thieves lost the game and the whole team was thrown back to the immaterial plane, beaten, battered, and Cursed.

An Unwitting Medium

Just when Ramsey thought the stress of Season β10 was over after dealing with Flinch, the Shoe Thieves' surprising Internet Series appearance, their near escape from a second showdown with the THE SHELLED ONE'S PODS, and their front row seat to Day X, the Season β10 elections left her Haunted. The whole team was shocked when Day 1 of Season β11, deceased Shoe Thief Atlas Jonbois inhabited Ramsey for a chance to step up to the plate once again. Jonbois apparently had so much fun with it that they came back again on Day 5 — the first player from the Hall of Flame to haunt twice.

Ramsey adjusted remarkably well to being haunted, possibly in part due to the guidance of their psychopomp dad, whom they had a long private conversation with following their first haunting on Day 46. For eight seasons Ramsey remained haunted, being inhabited over 1,000 times, before an unexpectedly having her ghosts traded for Flippers during the Season β18 elections. Their only comments after the reform were noting that "it's very quiet" and that they could "think of a few different uses for these flippers."

Personal Life

Upon first moving to Charleston, Ramsey was surprised to discover that Forrest Bookbaby, a fellow Moab resident who was several years her senior, had also joined the team. Bookbaby had been one of their babysitters when they were younger and had even tutored them in algebra, so it wasn't surprising to learn that he had been signed up to be the Shoe Thieves' accountant. Despite all of this, they didn't talk much about their shared childhood and several teammates were unaware that they even knew each other prior to joining the ILB. Most only learned of this after Bookbaby was transferred to the Philly Pies.

Ramsey became fast friends with Morrow Doyle and Workman Gloom, being similar in age and all sharing a legitimate fondness for blaseball. The three were quite the unit, frequently found planning heists over a plate of Ramsey’s famous snickerdoodles, at the batting cages, or requisitioning the clubhouse TV to watch Jeoplardy and Wheel of Flortune together.

After Gloom feedbacked to the Canada Moist Talkers in Season β4, Ramsey took over primary care of their dog, Beasley Gloom[4] until he was subsequently traded to the Talkers as well in Season β9. While in Ramsey’s care, she took him for lots of walks, and made sure he knew he was a very good boy.

The Esme Ramsey Quartet's rendition of "You Better Watch Your Step"

Ramsey plays jazz stand-up bass and sings in the Esme Ramsey Quartet which they started with some of their fellow Shoe Thieves — a passtime likely inspired by growing up with a dad that had a strong appreciation for jazz, and occasional performances with her school's jazz band as a vocalist. Original members of the quartet included Joe Voorhees (piano), Gunther O'Brian (drums), and Antonio Wallace (ribcage xylophone). Over the years as players have left the team, the Quartet membership has changed, but Ramsey and Voorhees have always been constants.

When not partaking in blaseball-related activities, Ramsey divides her time between their apartment in Charleston and back home in Hellmouth visiting her dad. They can often be found in the kitchen, working their way through a stack of recipe cards from the league's fellow bakers or writing poetry.[5]

Quotes

  • On cooking tips: "It's easier to fit the ball in your mouth if you cut it in half first." Also: "I learned this technique in culinary school. It's called 'digestion'."
  • On fashion: "Why are you speaking to me?"
  • On preferred pronouns: "Who gave you permission to refer to me at all?"
  • On Blaseball:

    Look, I've seen the beginning and end of everything, I've stared directly into the blinding visage of the being that threw the First Pitch, I've seen the entirety of time and space laid out before me like a cheap hotel continental breakfast buffet. And you know what? Last game I struck out twice, my team has a losing record, and one of our best players just transferred to the Wet Faces or whatever. None of it matters. We're all gonna die. You either eat [expletive deleted] or play ball. I'm gonna play ball.

Fan Works

References

  1. ↑ The Crossing-Trombone-Meadows family has noted that Sanders would spend more time at Ramsey's house than her own.
  2. ↑ Allegedly, to impress a woman she was dating at the time.
  3. ↑ Or an approximation thereof.
  4. ↑ With the help of new teammate Joe Voorhees.
  5. ↑ A hobby Ramsey vehemently denies having.


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