Difference between revisions of "Simon Haley"

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{{Player
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{{NewAutomatedPlayer
 
|image1=Simon card.png
 
|image1=Simon card.png
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|caption1=Tlopps card by gamey {{Twitter|name=AnimatesGamey}}
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|caption1=Tlopps card by gamey {{Twitter|name=WerewolfGamey}}
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|team=[[Charleston Shoe Thieves]]
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|former=[[Charleston Shoe Thieves]]
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|former=[[Canada Moist Talkers]]
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|dates=Jul 30, 2020–present
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|status=Active
 
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|dates=Jul 30, 2020–present
 
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|modifications={{Modif|flinch}}<br />{{Modif|noise-cancelling headphones}}
 
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|batting={{Star Rating|4.5}}
 
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|pitching={{Star Rating|2.0}}
 
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|baserunning={{Star Rating|5.0}}
 
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|defense={{Star Rating|2.5}}
 
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|item=None
 
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|armor=Noise-Cancelling Headphones
 
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|evolution=Base
 
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|ritual=Rain dance
 
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|coffee=Decaf
 
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|blood=AA
 
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|fate=63
 
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|soulscream=XEAOIXEAOIXOEAHIOEAHIOEXEAUEXEAUEIEAEXIEAEXIEUIXIEUIXIEAHIEIAHIEIA
 
 
|position=Aerial Defender
 
|position=Aerial Defender
 
|shoe_specialty=Hi-tops and moon shoes
 
|shoe_specialty=Hi-tops and moon shoes
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|player_twitter=
 
|player_twitter=
 
|uuid  =020ed630-8bae-4441-95cc-0e4ecc27253b
 
|uuid  =020ed630-8bae-4441-95cc-0e4ecc27253b
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|peanut_allergy=Allergic}}
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}}
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'''{{PAGENAME}}''' is a lineup player for the [[Charleston Shoe Thieves]], and has been with the team since [[Season 8]].
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'''{{PAGENAME}}''' is a player for the [[Canada Moist Talkers]], and has been with the team since [[Fall Ball]]. Haley has played for the [[Charleston Shoe Thieves]].
  
 
__FORCETOC__
 
__FORCETOC__
 
==Official League Records==
 
==Official League Records==
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Haley entered the league on the [[Canada Moist Talkers]] as a replacement for [[Trevino Merritt]] after Merritt's [[incineration]] during [[Season 2]].
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Haley joined the [[ILB]] as a lineup player for the [[Canada Moist Talkers]] after the [[incineration]] of [[Trevino Merritt]] on {{BetaSeason|2}}, Day 72.
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On {{BetaSeason|3}}, Day 8, Haley swallowed a [[Peanuts|peanut]] and had an [[Peanuts_(weather)#Reactions|allergic]] reaction, resulting in a combined {{Star Change|9.8|5.9}} stat decrease.
  
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On Day 8 of [[Season 3]], Haley consumed a stray peanut and had an allergic reaction. Haley's hitting rank dropped from {{Star Rating|2.5}} to {{Star Rating|1}}
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On {{BetaSeason|8}}, Day 44, Haley was exchanged to the [[Charleston Shoe Thieves]] due to [[Feedback]]. Haley was replaced by [[Eugenia Garbage]].
  
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On Day 44 of [[Season 8]], Haley switched to the Shoe Thieves in a [[feedback]] event with [[Eugenia Garbage]].
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During the {{BetaSeason|8#Blessings 2}} election, the Shoe Thieves received the '''Radical Alchemy''' blessing, which randomized Haley's batting from {{Star Change|1.2|3.3}}
  
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At the end of [[Season 8#Blessings 2|Season 8]], the '''Radical Alchemy''' blessing randomized Simon's batting stats from ★ to ★★★½.
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On Day 7 of {{BetaSeason|10}}, Haley hit the first recorded pentaslam (5-run home run) and found the [[Blagonballs#4-Blood_Blagonball|4-Blood Blagonball]].
  
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On Day 7 of [[Season 10]], Haley hit the first recorded pentaslam (5-run home run) and found the [[Blagonballs#4-Blood_Blagonball|4-Blood Blagonball]].
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On [[Day_X#Season_9|Season 9, Day X]], Haley gained the {{ModLink|Flinch}} modification after the Shoe Thieves lost to [[THE SHELLED ONE'S PODS]].
  
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On Season 10, Day 8, some of Haley's defensive ability was siphoned by [[Yeong-Ho Benitez]], bringing it from ★ to ½.
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On {{BetaSeason|10}}, Day 81, Haley's defensive ability was siphoned by [[Philly Pies]] lineup player [[Yeong-Ho Benitez]] in a game with [[Blooddrain]] weather, decreasing it {{Star Change|1.0|0.7}}.
  
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In the [[Season 10#Blessings 2|Season 10 elections]], Haley received '''Noise-Cancelling Headphones''', becoming [[Modifications|Soundproof]].
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In the {{BetaSeason|10#Blessings 2|@ elections}}, Haley received '''Noise-Cancelling Headphones''', becoming [[Modifications|Soundproof]]. (The Headphones would later be lost, along with all other Discipline Era items across the league, at the beginning of Season 15.)
  
 
During the [[Coffee Cup]], Haley played for [[Club de Calf]] as a lineup player.
 
During the [[Coffee Cup]], Haley played for [[Club de Calf]] as a lineup player.
  
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On {{BetaSeason|24}}, Day 83, Haley retreated to the Shoe Thieves' [[Shadows]] in exchange for [[Gallup Murphy]] due to [[Night]].
 +
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During the December 16, 2022 [[Fall Ball]], Haley fell to the [[Canada Moist Talkers]].
 +
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During the [[Season 1#Election Results|Season 1 Elections]], Haley gained the [[Knighted]] Modification, and embarked on a quest in the Moist Talkers' Shadows following the passing of the '''NEW Open the Forbidden Book''' Decree. They were replaced on the active roster by [[Pixie Carberry]].
 
{{Community Lore}}
 
{{Community Lore}}
 +
 
==Blaseball Career==
 
==Blaseball Career==
 
===Achievements===
 
===Achievements===
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Haley was voted ILB Rookie of the Year by fan vote at the end of [[Season 2]]. They are the first player to receive this award.
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Haley was voted ILB Rookie of the Year by fan vote at the end of {{BetaSeason|2}}. {{RandomPronoun|upper|subject|is|are|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Bugsbenedict/Simon_Haley_Pronouns}}}} the first player to receive this award.
  
 
==Personal Life==
 
==Personal Life==
 
Simon Haley is rumored to be the lovechild of 18th Century English astronomer [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edmond_Halley Edmond Halley] and the short-period comet [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halley%27s_Comet 1P/Halley], conceived sometime following Edmond Halley's death in 1742.
 
Simon Haley is rumored to be the lovechild of 18th Century English astronomer [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edmond_Halley Edmond Halley] and the short-period comet [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halley%27s_Comet 1P/Halley], conceived sometime following Edmond Halley's death in 1742.
  
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Haley came down to the Moist Talkers from on high after Trevino Merritt's incineration, and was chosen to take Merritt's place after they displayed much of the same batting and running prowess as their predecessor.
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Haley came down to the Moist Talkers from on high after Trevino Merritt's incineration, and was chosen to take Merritt's place after {{RandomPronoun|lower|subject|table={{UserWiki:Bugsbenedict/Simon_Haley_Pronouns}}}}displayed much of the same batting and running prowess as {{RandomPronoun|lower|adjective|table={{UserWiki:Bugsbenedict/Simon_Haley_Pronouns}}}} predecessor.
  
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After his unfortunate peanut reaction in Season 3, Haley founded the Anti-Peanut Alliance and devoted himself to it. After the [[Season 9]] playoffs, the Alliance began creating fliers proclaiming "Top 10 Anti-Peanut Tips For The Upcoming Battle Against God" and posting advice in a similar vein online. Following the fall of [[the Shelled One]], Haley is quoted saying "I'm just proud I could do my part to help." When asked what the Alliance would do next, Haley responded that "we may branch out to herald the defeat of other corrupt gods, but as of now we're back to fighting against the evils of the common nut. Did you know over 60% of ILB players are allergic?"
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After {{RandomPronoun|lower|adjective|table={{UserWiki:Bugsbenedict/Simon_Haley_Pronouns}}}} unfortunate peanut reaction in Season 3, Haley founded the Anti-Peanut Alliance and devoted {{RandomPronoun|lower|reflexive|table={{UserWiki:Bugsbenedict/Simon_Haley_Pronouns}}}} to it. After the {{BetaSeason|9}} playoffs, the Alliance began creating fliers proclaiming "Top 10 Anti-Peanut Tips For The Upcoming Battle Against God" and posting advice in a similar vein online. Following the fall of [[the Shelled One]], Haley is quoted saying "I'm just proud I could do my part to help." When asked what the Alliance would do next, Haley responded that "we may branch out to herald the defeat of other corrupt gods, but as of now we're back to fighting against the evils of the common nut. Did you know over 60% of ILB players are allergic?"
  
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On their swap to the Charleston Shoe Thieves, Haley told reporters that they quickly slotted into the team's dynamic, in part due to pamphlets printed up by former teammate [[Lachlan Shelton]] to help former Talkers adapt to their new environment. Teammate [[Howell Franklin]] commented that "When you first talk to Simon, she seems like such a shy little thing. But when she opens up? Absolute chaos. She just wants to yell. I respect that immensely." The two appear to be friends in some capacity as, after the season 10 game in which Haley hit the ILB's first ever recorded pentaslam, Franklin reportedly lifted her onto their shoulders and did a lap around the field while Haley emitted whoops of delight.
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On {{RandomPronoun|lower|adjective|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Bugsbenedict/Simon_Haley_Pronouns}}}} swap to the Charleston Shoe Thieves, Haley told reporters that {{RandomPronoun|lower|subject|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Bugsbenedict/Simon_Haley_Pronouns}}}}quickly slotted into the team's dynamic, in part due to pamphlets printed up by former teammate [[Lachlan Shelton]] to help former Talkers adapt to their new environment. Teammate [[Howell Franklin]] commented that "When you first talk to Simon, {{RandomPronoun|lower|subject|seems|seem|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Bugsbenedict/Simon_Haley_Pronouns}}}} like such a shy little thing. But when {{RandomPronoun|lower|subject|opens|open|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Bugsbenedict/Simon_Haley_Pronouns}}}} up? Absolute chaos. {{RandomPronoun|upper|subject|just wants|just want|save=true|table={{UserWiki:Bugsbenedict/Simon_Haley_Pronouns}}}} to yell. I respect that immensely." The two appear to be friends in some capacity as, after the season 10 game in which Haley hit the ILB's first ever recorded pentaslam, Franklin reportedly lifted {{RandomPronoun|lower|object|table={{UserWiki:Bugsbenedict/Simon_Haley_Pronouns}}}} onto their shoulders and did a lap around the field while Haley emitted whoops of delight.
  
 
===Trivia===
 
===Trivia===
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*Haley's favourite skittles are the green ones
 
*Haley's favourite skittles are the green ones
  
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==Gallery==
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==Fan Works==
 
<gallery>
 
<gallery>
 
File:HaleyCard.png|Simon Haley Tlopps card by {{Twitter|name=Spiral_Joe}}, logo by {{Twitter|name=LonghairQ}}, original design by {{Twitter|name=Avery_Helm}}
 
File:HaleyCard.png|Simon Haley Tlopps card by {{Twitter|name=Spiral_Joe}}, logo by {{Twitter|name=LonghairQ}}, original design by {{Twitter|name=Avery_Helm}}
 
File:Simonhaley tlopps.png|Tlopps card by homekeys on Discord
 
File:Simonhaley tlopps.png|Tlopps card by homekeys on Discord
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File:Simon card.png|Tlopps card by gamey {{Twitter|name=AnimatesGamey}}
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File:Simon card.png|Tlopps card by gamey {{Twitter|name=WerewolfGamey}}
 
File:Simon doodles.png|Doodles of Simon by {{Twitter|name=bugsbenedict}}
 
File:Simon doodles.png|Doodles of Simon by {{Twitter|name=bugsbenedict}}
 
File:Simon with the stars and stuff.png|by {{Twitter|name=bugsbenedict}}
 
File:Simon with the stars and stuff.png|by {{Twitter|name=bugsbenedict}}
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File:Simon ash.png|Simon by {{Twitter|name=revivificating}}
 
File:Simon ash.png|Simon by {{Twitter|name=revivificating}}
 
File:Story about COWBOYS.png|Simon and Lars in Western outfits by {{Twitter|name=bugsbenedict}}
 
File:Story about COWBOYS.png|Simon and Lars in Western outfits by {{Twitter|name=bugsbenedict}}
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File:ExKoufgWQAcUnqj.png|Simon partying by [https://solphy.tumblr.com/ @solphy]
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File:ExQH QbW8AIuowv.jpg|Simon, [[Pudge Nakamoto]], and [[Fitzgerald Wanderlust]] by [https://solphy.tumblr.com/ @solphy]
 
File:Comet miniblaseball.png|Miniblaseballer by [https://miniblaseball.surge.sh/ @HetreaSky]
 
File:Comet miniblaseball.png|Miniblaseballer by [https://miniblaseball.surge.sh/ @HetreaSky]
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File:WHOMST.jpg|''have we met?''<br />by '''[https://twitter.com/revivificating/status/1352093893819576322?s=20 Ash]'''
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File:2023CoronationSerHaley.png|Coronation Era Simon, out on his quest. Art by [https://www.tumblr.com/animg8r Lilg8r]
 
</gallery>
 
</gallery>
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{{AutomatedPlayerNav|020ed630-8bae-4441-95cc-0e4ecc27253b|talkers}}
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{{TeamNavSelector|shoe thieves}}
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{{FormerTeamCategorySelector|shoe thieves}}
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{{TeamCategorySelector|shoe thieves}}
 
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{{FormerTeamCategorySelector|talkers}}
 
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[[Category:Players]]
 
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[[Category:Lineup Players]]
 
 
[[Category:Players Who Replaced an Incinerated Player‏‎]]
 
[[Category:Players Who Replaced an Incinerated Player‏‎]]
 
[[Category:Players with a Tlopps card‏‎]]
 
[[Category:Players with a Tlopps card‏‎]]
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[[Category:Nonhuman Players]]
 
[[Category:Nonhuman Players]]
 
[[Category:Club de Calf]]
 
[[Category:Club de Calf]]
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[[Category:Players with the Knighted Modification]]

Latest revision as of 23:41, 14 March 2024

Simon Haley is a player for the Canada Moist Talkers, and has been with the team since Fall Ball. Haley has played for the Charleston Shoe Thieves.


Official League Records

Haley joined the ILB as a lineup player for the Canada Moist Talkers after the incineration of Trevino Merritt on Season β2, Day 72.

On Season β3, Day 8, Haley swallowed a peanut and had an allergic reaction, resulting in a combined 9.8 → 5.9 stat decrease.

On Season β8, Day 44, Haley was exchanged to the Charleston Shoe Thieves due to Feedback. Haley was replaced by Eugenia Garbage.

During the Season β8 election, the Shoe Thieves received the Radical Alchemy blessing, which randomized Haley's batting from 1.2 → 3.3

On Day 7 of Season β10, Haley hit the first recorded pentaslam (5-run home run) and found the 4-Blood Blagonball.

On Season 9, Day X, Haley gained the Flinch modification after the Shoe Thieves lost to THE SHELLED ONE'S PODS.

On Season β10, Day 81, Haley's defensive ability was siphoned by Philly Pies lineup player Yeong-Ho Benitez in a game with Blooddrain weather, decreasing it 1.0 → 0.7 .

In the Season β10 elections, Haley received Noise-Cancelling Headphones, becoming Soundproof. (The Headphones would later be lost, along with all other Discipline Era items across the league, at the beginning of Season 15.)

During the Coffee Cup, Haley played for Club de Calf as a lineup player.

On Season β24, Day 83, Haley retreated to the Shoe Thieves' Shadows in exchange for Gallup Murphy due to Night.

During the December 16, 2022 Fall Ball, Haley fell to the Canada Moist Talkers.

During the Season 1 Elections, Haley gained the Knighted Modification, and embarked on a quest in the Moist Talkers' Shadows following the passing of the NEW Open the Forbidden Book Decree. They were replaced on the active roster by Pixie Carberry.

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Blaseball Career

Achievements

Haley was voted ILB Rookie of the Year by fan vote at the end of Season β2. Xe is the first player to receive this award.

Personal Life

Simon Haley is rumored to be the lovechild of 18th Century English astronomer Edmond Halley and the short-period comet 1P/Halley, conceived sometime following Edmond Halley's death in 1742.

Haley came down to the Moist Talkers from on high after Trevino Merritt's incineration, and was chosen to take Merritt's place after he displayed much of the same batting and running prowess as eir predecessor.

After zir unfortunate peanut reaction in Season 3, Haley founded the Anti-Peanut Alliance and devoted herself to it. After the Season β9 playoffs, the Alliance began creating fliers proclaiming "Top 10 Anti-Peanut Tips For The Upcoming Battle Against God" and posting advice in a similar vein online. Following the fall of the Shelled One, Haley is quoted saying "I'm just proud I could do my part to help." When asked what the Alliance would do next, Haley responded that "we may branch out to herald the defeat of other corrupt gods, but as of now we're back to fighting against the evils of the common nut. Did you know over 60% of ILB players are allergic?"

On xir swap to the Charleston Shoe Thieves, Haley told reporters that xe quickly slotted into the team's dynamic, in part due to pamphlets printed up by former teammate Lachlan Shelton to help former Talkers adapt to their new environment. Teammate Howell Franklin commented that "When you first talk to Simon, xe seems like such a shy little thing. But when xe opens up? Absolute chaos. Xe just wants to yell. I respect that immensely." The two appear to be friends in some capacity as, after the season 10 game in which Haley hit the ILB's first ever recorded pentaslam, Franklin reportedly lifted him onto their shoulders and did a lap around the field while Haley emitted whoops of delight.

Trivia

  • Haley's birthday is July 12, 1986
  • Haley is a Type 1 diabetic and has an insulin pump
  • Haley's favourite skittles are the green ones

Fan Works


Canada Moist Talkers 🗣
Players Batters
Pitchers
Shadows
BuriedBennett Takahashi · Justice Valenzuela · Stephanie Winters · Cell Longarms
Former · Full List
Stats Season (NEW)1
Season (Beta)1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12 · 13 · 14 · 15 · 16 · 17 · 18 · 19 · 20 · 21 · 22 · 23· 24
CircuitGamma 2 · Gamma 3 · Gamma 4
Ballpark Gleek Arena
Community Lore
Staff Michel É. Moose and Chalky Hoodwinkle · THE MAW · Belligerent Phlegm Receptacle · The Moist Owlette · H O R K · The ORB
Places Halifax · Canada
History Canada Moist Talkers' History
Fan Culture 📣 · Fan Works 💌 · Tlopps Cards 🃏
TALK SPIT, GET HITS

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