Mclaughlin Scorpler

Mclaughlin Scorpler
Basic Information
Team	Hades Tigers
Status	Active
Batting
Pitching
Defense
Running
Personal Information
Item	None
Armor	Noise-Cancelling Headphones
Evolution	Base
Pregame Ritual	Staring into the souls of their opponents
Coffee Style	Plenty of Sugar
Blood Type	Fire
Fate	21
Soulscream	IUEIOIUEIOIHXAOAHXAOAHOAAOHOAAOHOXHAEIXHAEIXXEAHUXEAHUXEOIOHEOIOHEAOAOHAOAOHAUOAAEUOAAEU
Biographical Details
Pronouns	They/Them
Species	Approximately 1,200 scorpions all voltroned together.
Side Hustle	Uber/Postmates Driver
Other Background Information
Likes	Ironically, frogs
Dislikes	the Frog

Mclaughlin Scorpler is a batter for the Hades Tigers. Mclaughlin has been with the team since the start of Season 4.

Official League Records

Scorpler played for the New York Millennials in Season 1 and was traded to the Tigers in exchange for Alyssa Harrell by the Tigers' Exile blessing during the Season 3 elections.

During the Season 5 elections, Scorpler received both the Fireproof Jacket and Noise-Cancelling Headphones blessings. As a player can only have one armor item, the Headphones replaced the Jacket entirely.

Player History

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Scorpler has traditionally worn the official jacket sported by Ryan Gosling in the 2011 film Drive on top of their Blaseball jersey while at bat. They both share the same birthday and Gosling himself presented Scorpler with the jacket as a birthday gift. They have been happily married for 12 years.

There have been reports from Hollywood journalists that Scorpler, and Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson are on shaky terms. This is likely due to a recent fight between the two after Mr. Johnson refused to accept Mclaughlin Scorpler as the one true Scorpion King.

Scorpler does not have a driver's license. However, this has not stopped them from driving for the ride-sharing app Uber. Since being traded to the Hades Tigers, Scorpler is no longer contractually obligated to have a "side hustle," but has chosen to continue driving for Uber anyway.

Since moving to Hades, Scorpler has worked closely with fellow batter Fish Summers on a business venture designing luxury, jumbo sized enclosure decorations. Whilst no goods are yet ready for market, Scorpler has been quoted as saying “the treasure chest is especially going to slap.”

During the Season 5 elections, the Blaseball gods blessed Scorpler with a fireproof jacket and approximately 1,200 pairs of tiny, scorpion-sized noise-cancelling headphones. Scorpler accepted the headphones, but refused to wear the fireproof jacket over his iconic scorpion jacket.

Trivia

• Scorpler has named their bat "The Stinger"

• Scorpler's favorite music artist is Sting. They have shared many a lunch together.
• Scorpler's favorite wrestler is Sting. Scorpler taught Sting The Scorpion Deathlock.
• Scorpler's favorite film series is The Scorpion King.
• Scorpler is known to only play Scorpion in the Mortal Kombat game series. Even when playing another fighting game, they insist and ask if they can play Scorpion.
• Scorpler's favorite band is The Scorpions. Whenever Scorpler takes the mound, "Rock You Like a Hurricane" is played.
• They are a Scorpio.
• Scorpler has previously worked as a tour guide on an amphibious Frog Boat, but was fired after commandeering the boat to reach a Millenials' game they were late for.