Alyssa Harrell is a pitcher for the Hawai'i Fridays, and has been with the team since the Season 20 elections. Harrell has played for the Hades Tigers, New York Millennials, Yellowstone Magic, Philly Pies, Baltimore Crabs, and Chicago Firefighters.
Official League Records
Harrell joined the ILB as a lineup player for the Hades Tigers with the Return of Blaseball. Harrell's stats were randomized by the Soul Swap blessing at the end of the season, resulting in a batting stat of .
On Season 4, Day 15, Harrell was exchanged to the Yellowstone Magic due to Feedback. Harrell was replaced by Penelope Mathews. On Day 16 (the game immediately following the feedback swap), Harrell hit two singles to help the Magic come back from 0-4 to beat the Charleston Shoe Thieves, 17-5.
On Season 8, Day 90, Harrell was exchanged to the Philly Pies due to Feedback. Harrell was replaced by the flickering Eduardo Woodman. Two innings later, Harrell and Woodman were exchanged again to their original teams.
On Season 17, Day 109, Harrell exited the Secret Base at Tastycake Stadium, losing Redacted and gaining the Attractor modification. Upon being batted in by Spears Taylor, Harrell joined the Hawai'i Fridays' bench.
During the Season 20 election, Harrell was then traded to the Hawai'i Fridays in exchange for Gabriel Griffith via the Firefighters' Equivalent Exchange will, becoming a lineup player in the process. Harrell's Attractor modification was also changed to the High Pressure modification by the Firefighters' Reform will.
During the Season 22 elections, Harrell retreated to the Fridays' Shadows as a result of the Fridays' Move will. Harrell's star ratings were then completely randomized as a result of the Shadow Alternate Trust blessing, resulting in Harrell gaining the Negative modification and a combined 15.2 -> 15.3 stat increase.
Harrell chooses to go by her surname in all contexts.
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.
Box of Alyssa Harrell Files
- Dust billows as the file box lands on the table. While many archives in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill are unified in some way, this... definitely isn’t one of them. The accompanying Rumor Registry explains all of the contents... wherever it is... but for now you grab the folder labelled IF-98.361 and start reading...
Hypothetically, "Harrell" might exist, and if she did, she would be completely justified in any hypothetical crimes she might choose to commit. Hypothetically, on the day she was hypothetically swapped with the Hawai'i Fridays' former player Dadly Bradley from whatever hypothetical team she came from before, she might have hypothetically absorbed his Dad Vibes and become the de facto second mother of the Fridays (after, of course, Our Lady of Perpetual Friday). This is possibly the first record of "Harrell's" non-existence, though it is hard to be sure since the record does not actually exist.
No one has ever seen, heard, touched, smelled, tasted, heard from, heard of, located, tracked, watched, spied on, sensed, felt, looked at, listened to, talked to, conversed with, or were able to discern anything about "Alyssa Harrell." Anything you might have heard about "Alyssa Harrell" is complete hearsay. It is impossible to describe "Alyssa Harrell" because she does not exist.
Notably, she has not paid taxes since 2009. This is notable because it is impossible for this information to be recorded, because she does not exist.
Harrell has not
A list of things that Harrell has not done includes, but is not limited to, the following:
- Tax evasion
- Election Fraud
- Hunting invasive species in Hawai’i
- “Time theft”
- Jailbreaking an iphone
- Base theft
- Dumping Old Bay into the Chesapeake Bay
- Prank-calling Beck Whitney and asking for "I P Freely"
- Using Terrell Bradley's email address to sign up for assorted newsletters
- Illegal gambling on croquet matches
- Waffle theft
|Stats||Season||1 · 2 · 3 · 4|
|Ballpark||Hawai'i Viberight Field|
|Staff||Our Lady of Perpetual Friday · C O C O N U T|
|Places||Sovereign Nation of Hawai'i|
|History||Hawai'i Fridays' History|
|Fan Culture 📣 · Fan Works 💌 · Tlopps Cards 🃏|
|It's Island Time!|