Eduardo Woodman

Eduardo Woodman
Art by Sernik
Basic Information
Team	Philly Pies
Former Team(s)	Hawai'i Fridays
Status	Active
Batting
Pitching
Defense
Running
Dates Active	Aug 3, 2020–present
External Links	Blaseball-Reference Player Changes Player Page
Personal Information
Item	None
Armor	None
Evolution	Base
Pregame Ritual	Bells
Coffee Style	Flat White
Blood Type	O No
Fate	39
Soulscream	OEEAOOEEAOOEUAEIEUAEIEEHAOUEHAOUEAXAHXAXAHXA
Other Background Information
Favorite Pie	Pecan

Eduardo Woodman is a lineup player for the Philly Pies. Woodman replaced Juan Rangel, who was incinerated on Season 3, Day 5. Woodman has also played for the Hawai'i Fridays.

Official League Records

Woodman was initially rated , but was upgraded to for unknown reasons following their first full game against the Hades Tigers. Woodman ate a peanut and improved their rating to on Season 3, Day 8 in a game against the Chicago Firefighters.

During the Season 5 election, Woodman's batting fell from to as a part of the Charleston Shoe Thieves' Bad Neighbors blessing.

On Season 6, Day 53, Rafael Davids siphoned off star from Woodman's pitching ability.

During the Pies' Season 7, Day 91 game against the Charleston Shoe Thieves, Woodman received a ½-star boost to all stats.

On Day 90 of Season 8, in a game against the Hawai'i Fridays, the flickering Woodman was exchanged with Alyssa Harrell in a feedback. The two were exchanged back to their original teams two innings later.

During the Coffee Cup, Woodman played for FWXBC as a lineup player.

Early Life

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Originally an ordinary man by the name of Nick Chopper, Eduardo "Ed Wood" Woodman used to make his living chopping down trees in the forests, as his father had before him. A wicked witch enchanted his axe to prevent him from marrying his sweetheart, after being bribed by the lazy old woman who kept the maiden as a servant, and did not wish to lose her. The enchanted axe chopped off his limbs, one by one. Each time he lost a limb, a tinsmith replaced it with a prosthetic limb made of tin. Finally, nothing was left of him but tin. However, the tinsmith neglected to replace his heart. Once Chopper was made entirely of tin, he was no longer able to love the lady he had fallen for.

Film Career

Chopper adopted the name Eduardo Woodman and devoted himself to directing movies, where he was credited as "Ed Wood." Although he hated being confused with the more famous Ed Wood, he nevertheless seemingly unwittingly directed a string of low-budget horror films with very similar names to the other Wood's films, including "Graverobbers from the Deep" and "Night of the Necro Nine."

Blaseball Career

Woodman finally gave up his film career and turned to blaseball. After several years with the Chattanooga MoonPies, he was called up to join the Philly Pies after the unexpected incineration of Juan Rangel.

While playing with the Pies, Woodman heard stories from his fellow player Morrow Wilson about the various escapades their roommate Ruslan Greatness had dragged them into. Woodman stayed overnight with Wilson and Greatness where he found their living situation "an untapped mine of comedy gold." Using iPhone footage of the night, Woodman created the pilot for the sitcom/documentary My Roomie Ruslan. The show was picked up for six seasons and premiered to critical and commercial success. Despite this the relationship between Woodman and Wilson soured. Wilson has tried to get the show cancelled as filming it requires them to be followed by a camera crew 24/7, but so far they have been unsuccessful.

After Lang Richardson, devoted thespian, joined the team, Woodman began to realize that he had lost his passion for acting.  However, he had not lost his passion for film.  When Ruslan Greatness asked to borrow Woodman’s car in order to go on a hijinks filled road trip to Seattle, Woodman realized the opportunity and turned the the trip into My Roomie Ruslan: The Mlovie, a directorial debut which critics described as “A thousand times better than any of the movies he acted in. Please don’t make us watch those movies.” Woodman continued his career as a director after the siesta, and while the change did not improve his own blaseball play, it is believed that his leadership helped the rest of his teammates to succeed, especially Richardson who went on to win MVP in season 9.

Gallery

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  Eduardo Woodman