Difference between revisions of "Lowe Forbes"

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Revision as of 05:14, 21 October 2020

Lowe Forbes is a pitcher for the Breckenridge Jazz Hands. Forbes has been with the Jazz Hands since Season 1.

Official League Records

On Season 7, Day 56, Forbes siphoned some of Unlimited Tacos batter Basilio Mason's pitching ability in a game with Blooddrain weather, bringing it from to .

Miscellania

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Template:JHLore Forbes' pregame ritual has caused large amounts of confusion, as few realize the "fans" they refer to are box fans, ceiling fans, and other cooling fans of that sort. Further complicating matters is Forbes' use of a blindfold, causing them to periodically mistake people who introduce themselves as fans for animate cooling fans. Typically, a teammate, staff member, or other fan will shoo Forbes away from the target fan using a broom, saxophone, or other such implement. On the few occasions where nobody is around to assist the targeted fan, Forbes is reported to have begun to bite the fan, but then realized the error and stopped.

The Jazz Hands refer to Forbes as Lowe "Lowe-ded Bases" Forbes. Forbes initially only had a one-star rating in part because of their insistence on playing with a blindfold on "for the challenge." This changed starting in Season 7 as Forbes began siphoning pitching ability from other players in the ILB. Forbes believes this is a manifestation of their vampiric powers, as they once bit former teammate Alexandria Dracaena, noted vampire. When an interviewer pointed out that this is not how vampires traditionally work, they cited their hatred of onions, tendency to sunburn, and inability to see themself in a mirror (while wearing their blindfold) as evidence of being a vampire. A letter from a Jazz Hands union laundry worker later hypothesized that Forbes' improvement could be due to their blindfold wearing thin, suggesting Forbes is actually an extremely strong pitcher under normal circumstances.

Forbes has made it on the Forbes list of Worst Blaseball Pitchers named Forbes. There they met Brock Forbes from the Baltimore Crabs. These rivals went on to start a romantic relationship and eventual marriage.

Interdimensional Rumor Mill

Drafted on a bet in the 91st round, this pile of assorted graphic t-shirts was created by Denver teen Tyler Forbes, who's going to tidy them up later, Mom. Their ability to pitch a blaseball is questionable at best, scintillating at worst, but don't be fooled: Lowe Forbes does indeed offer a Morphe discount code for 10% off your order when you like and subscribe.

Gallery