Luis Acevedo/IF-74.129

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Rumor / Community Lore
This article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community. It is just one of many Rumors that we've found in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill. You can find more Rumors about Luis Acevedo at their Rumor Registry.

Personal Life

Luis Acevedo Encarnación is a marimba player for the Modal Garages Of Seattle. Acevedo's history is often in question due to their supernaturally extended lifespan and tendency to over exaggerate events when asked by reporters or fellow players. Seattle Garages Clubhouse Management has obtained several historical documents and ephemera related to Acevedo's exploits throughout the centuries, but those files are kept in a sealed archive. It is known as public record that Acevedo was born in Puerto Rico and later took up residence in Washington State, though their exact birthdate and other locations of travel and residence are largely matters of hearsay.

20th Century

Stories of Acevedo from this time period indicate that this is when they started getting involved in the music community in Washington, first by working at a record store selling rhythm and blues records and later by playing and making music of their own. Acevedo's friendliness and support of local music made them quite popular across the Pacific Northwest, and the regional love of "Louie Louie" (covered by Tacoma band The Wailers and made famous by Portland band The Kingsmen) is often linked to their love of Luis.

21st Century

In the early 21st century, Acevedo elected to have their consciousness uploaded into a software matrix that could handle their musicianship and be capable of developing an appropriate splortsona. Crypton Fluture Media offered a lucrative package to the Acevedo estate through VLOCALOID NEO X to upload Acevedo's soul into a VLOCALOID Mainframe. This mainframe is where the digital soul of Acevedo resides, using soundbanks of every previous available Luis to speak. Acevedo is known in the splorting world as a renowned heckler and has an uncanny ability to shake opposing batters with their patented "EY BATTER, BATTER. SWING BATTER!" cry that comes in four descending phrygian octaves at a time.

Acevedo is one of the most popular Latine Vlocaloids, being particularly popular in Puerto Rico. Several popular songs have been made or covered using their voicebank, such as “The Disappearance of Luis Acevedo,” “The Vlampire,” “Colorful Mlarine Snow,” and “Dance Notarobot Dance.”

On the Seattle Garages

During Season 3, Day 57, after Tot Clark had pitched the entire game, Acevedo was inspired to finish the game for him so that they could go to Beth's Cafe together to celebrate. This was the fourth and final shame of a day filled with shame for many of the league's home teams, colloquially known as The Day of the Grand Shame.

Relationship with Tot Clark

Luis Acevedo and Tot Clark are known partners in crime and marriage, although when their relationship began is unknown (and thought to be purposefully obscured by their stories, which range across several centuries and double back on themselves). Their relationship seemed to stay strong even after Acevedo’s trade to the Crabs—Clark has often been seen at the Crabitat or around Baltimore, often with Acevedo, and Acevedo was occasionally seen visiting Seattle in the off-season.

After the Crabs’ descension in Season 12, the two had a wedding once the season was over, determined to renew their vows. Many Garages, Crabs, Firefighters, and Worms were in attendance. Acevedo’s handmade capias were distributed to every guest, and the doll look-alike of them at the reception seemed to reflect any last-minute changes Acevedo made to their wedding dress, some of which were performed during the ceremony itself. The reception dinner reportedly had a “lot of crab, lowercase c” and several other Baltimore staples.

One reporter thought that the wedding would be a chance to find out how long the two had been together. However, this was a failed effort, as Acevedo told a winding story that Clark occasionally chipped in on (which held approximately zero answers and raised about ten more questions) before the two of them were whisked off by Finn James to continue enjoying the reception.

On the Baltimore Crabs

Acevedo was traded to the Crabs in Season 7 and quickly acclimated to the team, performing well above their rating as a batter to fit in with the Baltimorean once-champions. Several other members of the Crabs are on record as saying that the inclusion of a former Garages member to the team has gotten them thinking seriously about starting their own band, with Tillman Henderson reported as saying (for the fifth time this month) that he is “gonna pick up the guitar again”. Acevedo also began exploring the Baltimore DIY music scene upon being traded to the Crabs, and can frequently be found at open mics and house shows with their teammates when not on the blaseball field. They often play plena, a genre of music originating from Puerto Rico, at these open mics, using spare holograms to play more instruments. Alongside their marimba and bells, a pandereta is kept in their locker in the Crabitat.

After becoming closer with the Crabs, Acevedo began opening up to their teammates about their history as an immortal being, including the fact that they may have been what many people today would think of as a "vampire" prior to their digitization and life as a Vlocaloid. Acevedo also revealed to the team that their obligation to play blaseball is tied up in their contract with Crypton Fluture Media, as a consequence of not reading the small print. The Crabs have warmly embraced Acevedo and their various 18th and 19th century ephemera, and have promised to help them train to be a stronger batter and smash their corporate overlords.

A common chant for Acevedo on the Crabs is “EYE OF LIGHT, FUTURE SIGHT,” often followed by “LET THEM WALK TO FIRST TONIGHT,” in celebration of Acevedo's uncanny ability to get singles and walks when at bat.

On the Ohio Worms

In Season 15 Luis Acevedo played for the Ohio Worms.

Return to the Crabs

In Season 16 Luis Acevedo was traded back to pitch for the Crabs alongside Parker Parra, where the two of them continued their trend of awful pitching, but this time in Baltimore. It wasn’t all bad for Acevedo though, with them getting a chance to pitch against their partner Tot Clark of the Garages. While they only won one of the three matches against Clark, Acevedo insisted that since they won the first match that it was the only one that counted.

In Season 17 the recently re-revived Chorby Soul passed on their instability to Acevedo, and on Day 2 of the season, Luis Acevedo was incinerated by a rogue umpire.

Upon their death the ashes of their projection machine were made into pearls and distributed to Tot Clark, Oliver Notarobot, Loubert Ji-Eun, Xandra Pancakes, Beck Whitney, Rivers Rosa, Sutton Dreamy, Evelton McBlase II, Edric Tosser, Alaynabella Hollywood and Kennedy Loser.

When Acevedo entered the Hall of Flame they bore no ill will towards Soul, who had unwillingly been the source of Acevedo’s incineration, noting that they had “been running on stolen time for centuries”. Allegedly, the first time that Acevedo haunted Loser they did something with the pearl they left to him. Acevedo has refused to tell anyone where it is, delighting in leaving their old captain perplexed.

The Hall Opens

Season 24 saw the reunion of Tot Clark and Luis Acevedo as Clark was incinerated under a Supernova Eclipse. Having spent nearly 7 seasons apart, they were eager to make up for lost time and catch up. Clark did however ask if Acevedo could “get their cowboy friend to stop throwing pitches at xem”. Reports of how Acevedo responded differ, running from exasperation, amusement, or murderous intent directed at their teammate.

In Literature

Crabs Poet Laureate Runolfio Peeper wrote the following after hearing a moving performance by Acevedo during the 7th inning stretch of one blaseball game:

Luis, marimbest of Seattle, you play so well
That you still the bats within the mouth of hell;
And cage the tigers, and fierce Wings, and Pies,
Through the soft taps of your lullabies;
You strike, strike, strike upon your booming planks,
And catch the drives that scream into our ranks.