Difference between revisions of "Seattle Garages"

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m (Fix grammar)
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''This page is about the Blaseball team; for the band composed of members of the Blaseball team, see [[The Garages]].''
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The '''Seattle Garages''' are a [[Blaseball]] team in the [[Chaotic Evil]] division of the [[Evil League]]. They have been a part of [[Internet League Blaseball]] since [[Season 1]]<ref>[[Facts/Lore Disambiguation Guide]]</ref>.
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{{Team|division=[[Chaotic Evil]]|home_town=Seattle|team_slogan="Smells like Team Spirit."|friends=[[Baltimore Crabs]], anyone who loves to rock sans [[Mike Townsend]]|rival=[[Miami Dalé]], [[Hellmouth Sunbeams]], [[Mike Townsend]]|emoji=🎸|social_media=[https://twitter.com/seagarages Twitter]|captain=[[Theodore Duende]]|stadium=[[Hotdogfingers Memorial Climate Pledge Garage and Parking Facility|The Big Garage]]|image1=GaragesLogo3.png}}
 
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The '''Seattle Garages''' are a [[Blaseball]] team in the [[Chaotic Evil]] division of the [[Evil League]]. They have been a part of [[Internet League Blaseball]] since [[Season 1]]<ref>[[Facts/Lore Disambiguation Guide]]</ref>. They play their home games at [[Hotdogfingers Memorial Climate Pledge Garage and Parking Facility]], also known as the Big Garage, which is located inside an aircraft hangar, a garage for planes.
 
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−
The Garages are also a musical supergroup known by [[The Garages|several names]] and composed of members of the best bands in the Seattle blunge scene. Before each home game, they perform their self-penned team song "Smells Like Team Spirit" in lieu of "The Star-Spangled Banner", which according to team captain and frontman [[Theodore Duende]] "doesn't even slap". Pitcher [[Mike Townsend]] was kicked out of the group after what the other band members deemed "poor performance in both senses of the word", but remains on the Garages' roster due to legal complications.
 
−
 
 
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The Garages play exclusively against teams that happen to be in the same city as their Eternal Tour, which lines up perfectly with their League-mandated schedule.
 
−
 
 
−
The bats used by the Garages are modified to have the appearance of electric guitars, though whether these bats can actually play any music other than harsh noise is debated by some Blaseball fans.
 
−
 
 
−
They are also an [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anarcho-syndicalism anarcho-syndicalist collective].
 
−
 
 
−
== History ==
 
−
 
 
−
In [[Season 1]], the Garages finished fifth in the Chaotic Evil division. Following the opening of [[The Forbidden Book]], star pitcher [[Jaylen Hotdogfingers]] was the first player in league history to be [[Incineration|incinerated]].
 
−
 
 
−
Despite competing for a playoff spot for most of [[Season 2]], the Garages finished with a 46-53 record, good for a tie for third place in their division. On Day 77, [[The Garage Opening]] occurred. The event has prompted some fans to use the phrase "the Garage Door is open to all fans", referencing both the event itself and "the liminal space between the excitement and disappointment that comes from being a fan of a Seattle splorts team".<sup>[citation needed]</sup>
 
−
 
 
−
The Garages kicked off [[Season 3]] with a 13-7 road victory against their heated rivals the [[Hellmouth Sunbeams]]. Despite the Sunbeams benefiting from a [[Season_3#Ongoing_Decrees|fourth strike]], [[Mike Townsend]] earned the victory, much to the shock and amusement of fans. Captain [[Theodore Duende]] want 4-for-5, while [[Allison Abbott]] and [[Avila Guzman]] each contributed home runs.
 
−
 
 
−
==Mascots==
 
−
 
 
−
After failing to agree on a single mascot for the whole team due to alleged hotheadedness, the Garages have come to a "temporary" solution where each player has their own mascot who roots for them.
 
−
 
 
−
[[Mike Townsend]]'s mascot is often ganged up on by the other 13 mascots, and has had to hire its own security detail.
 
−
 
 
−
===List of player mascots ===
 
−
 
 
−
*Leif - The mascot of Mike Townsend which is a loaf of bread with googly eyes. He was not intended to be one of the Garages' mascots but the concept was repurposed from Townsend's Seattle Bread pitch which was struck down.
 
−
* Annie Amp - a Vox AC30 amplifier with googly eyes. Avila Guzman's mascot.
 
−
* Seamus the Box of Small Press Comics - a short box of limited run small press comics with googly eyes. Allison Abbott's mascot.
 
−
* Rolly Rower - an old rowing machine covered in dust, with googly eyes. Luis Acevedo's mascot.
 
−
* Terry Tires - a tire with googly eyes. Oliver Mueller's mascot.
 
−
*Fanny Flannel - a flannel jacket with googly eyes. Arturo Huerta's mascot.
 
−
*Freezy - a second freezer with googly eyes. Malik Destiny's mascott.
 
−
* Spencer the Semi-Sentient Superchunk Poster - a Superchunk tour poster with googly eyes (but not where you think)
 
−
*Unnamed Ancient Sarcophagus - an ancient sarcophagus with googly eyes. Tot Clark's mascot.
 
−
*Henry Hubcap - a hubcap with googly eyes.
 
−
*Carrie T - a non-functioning CRT TV with googly eyes.
 
−
*A.C. - an air conditioner with googly eyes.
 
−
*Drew the Drawer - a drawer full of skateboard parts with googly eyes. The drawer has googly eyes, not the parts.
 
−
*Henry Marshallow is the second Seattle Garages player to serve as his own mascot, gluing giant googly eyes to his pectorals
 
−
 
 
−
==== Mascots of incinerated players ====
 
−
 
 
−
*Arthur - an artificial Christmas tree with googly eyes. Bennett Browning's mascot.
 
−
*Tiana Cash was the first Seattle Garages player to serve as her own mascot, gluing googly eyes to her own face.
 
−
*Wally Workbench - a workbench with googly eyes. Shaquille Torres' mascot.
 
−
 
 
−
==Fans==
 
−
 
 
−
The Garages have a die-hard fanbase known as the Band. Many fans are known to camp out in the stands for weeks or even months on end, enjoying games and concerts 24/7. An anonymous superfan who claimed to have lived in seat D20 for the last 93 years was quoted as saying, "They may not win the most games, but they definitely rock the most".
 
−
 
 
−
==Chants==
 
−
 
 
−
*"PARK IT!"
 
−
*"LET'S ROCK!"
 
−
*"MONSTERA MASH!"
 
−
*"DUENDE!" (excitedly)
 
−
* "DERRICK!" (exasperatedly)
 
−
*''"TOWNSEND!"'' (more exasperatedly)
 
−
*"Please, Blaseball Gods, give us a good pitcher!" (repeated until the words no longer have meaning)
 
−
*"PLUG THE BANDS!" (followed by everyone shouting out names of local independent bands)
 
−
*"THUMBS UP!"
 
−
*''"TOWNSEND!"'' (slightly less exasperatedly)
 
−
*"GWIFF DON'T WHIFF!" (a chant for batter [[Greer Gwiffin]])
 
−
*"NAIL BAT" (a commonly used chant for batter [[Allison Abbott]])
 
−
*"SHAQ ATTAQ" (a commonly used chant for batter [[Shaquille Torres]])
 
−
*"LANG GANG" (a commonly used chant for batter [[Lang Richardson]])
 
−
*"KING TOT" (a commonly used chant for pitcher [[Tot Clark]])
 
−
*"PARK IT" (a chant meant to encourage the current pitcher to strike out opposing batters)
 
−
 
 
−
==Creative output==
 
−
 
 
−
===Music===
 
−
 
 
−
The group's early output was animal-themed. A representative song of this era is "About a Squirrel", which is about a squirrel.<ref>[https://thegarages.bandcamp.com/album/about-a-squirrel About A Squirrel - Song by @ariskofrain and mucusqueen]</ref>
 
−
 
 
−
Following [[Jaylen Hotdogfingers]]' incineration, the Garages recorded "Heart-Shaped Hotdog".<ref>[https://juneseptember.bandcamp.com/track/heart-shaped-hotdog-demo Heart Shaped Hotdog - A song by june september]</ref>
 
−
 
 
−
The group recorded "Black Hole Sunbeam" to commemorate the absolute thrashing the Garages gave the [[Hellmouth Sunbeams]] on Season 2 Day 54.
 
−
 
 
−
On 4 August 2020, the group released "Mike Townsend (Is a Disappointment)".<ref>[https://thegarages.bandcamp.com/track/mike-townsend-is-a-disappointment "mike townsend (is a disappointment)" by Rain]</ref>
 
−
 
 
−
===Zine ===
 
−
 
 
−
[[THE SUN IS OUR ENEMY|''THE SUN IS OUR ENEMY'']] is the official zine of the Garages, edited by [[Allison Abbott]] and featuring contributions by various members of the organization.
 
−
 
 
−
==Controversies==
 
−
 
 
−
Following the opening of [[The Forbidden Book]] at the end of [[Season 1]], some<sup>[Who?]</sup> began speculating that the entire Garages team does not actually exist. Proponents of this theory claim that the Garages players and their fanbase are "delusional, hallucinating, enthralled by the restless spirits of Seattle, or perpetuating a hoax designed to attack the heart of the game of [[Blaseball]] itself". The most prominent supporters of this conspiracy have been the [[Hellmouth Sunbeams]].
 
−
 
 
−
Some fans and players speculate that Jaylen Hotdogfingers was actually murdered by [[The Sun|the Sun]] rather than incinerated by a rogue [[Umpire]], or that she is not actually dead.
 
−
 
 
−
==Players==
 
−
===Batters===
 
  
 +
==Roster==
 +
===Lineup===
 
*[[Malik Destiny]]
 
*[[Malik Destiny]]
 
*[[Theodore Duende]]
 
*[[Theodore Duende]]
Line 109: Line 14:
  
 
===Pitchers===
 
===Pitchers===
−
 
+
*[[Mike Townsend]]
−
*[[Mike Townsend]] (for legal reasons)
 
 
*[[Tot Clark]]
 
*[[Tot Clark]]
 
*[[Arturo Huerta]]
 
*[[Arturo Huerta]]
Line 116: Line 20:
 
*[[Henry Marshallow]]
 
*[[Henry Marshallow]]
  
−
===Incinerated===
 
  
 +
==Former Players==
 +
===Blessings and Trades===
 +
No players on the Seattle Garages have ever left through blessings or trades.
 +
 +
=== Incinerations===
 
*[[Jaylen Hotdogfingers]]
 
*[[Jaylen Hotdogfingers]]
 
*[[Bennett Browning]]
 
*[[Bennett Browning]]
Line 123: Line 31:
 
*[[Shaquille Torres]]
 
*[[Shaquille Torres]]
 
*[[Derrick Krueger]]
 
*[[Derrick Krueger]]
 +
 +
Select [[Tlopps Blaseball Cards|Tlopps]] player cards can be found [[Gallery of Tlopps Cards#Seattle_Garages_.F0.9F.8E.B8|here]].
 +
  
 
==Season Results==
 
==Season Results==
Line 128: Line 39:
 
|+
 
|+
 
!Season
 
!Season
−
! Record
+
!Record
 
!Win %
 
!Win %
−
! Place in LC Division
+
!Place in LC Division
 
!Season Notes
 
!Season Notes
 
|-
 
|-
−
|1
+
| 1
−
|43-54<ref>Season 1 is missing the results of Day 98 and 99's games. Blaseball has been lost.</ref>
+
|43-54
−
|.434
+
| .434
 
|5th
 
|5th
 
|[[The Forbidden Book]] was opened after this season, resulting in the incineration of Jaylen Hotdogfingers
 
|[[The Forbidden Book]] was opened after this season, resulting in the incineration of Jaylen Hotdogfingers
 
|-
 
|-
 
|2
 
|2
−
|46-53
+
| 46-53
 
|.464
 
|.464
 
|4th
 
|4th
Line 151: Line 62:
 
|
 
|
 
|}
 
|}
 +
<sub><nowiki>*</nowiki>Season 1 is missing the results of Day 98 and 99's games. Blaseball has been lost.</sub>
 +
 +
==Team Overview==
 +
{{Community Lore}}
 +
<small>For a more in-depth look at the team, see [[Seattle Garages/History]].</small>
 +
 +
The Garages play their home games at [[Hotdogfingers Memorial Climate Pledge Garage and Parking Facility]], also known as the Big Garage, which is located inside an aircraft hangar, a garage for planes.
 +
 +
The Garages are also a musical supergroup known by [[The Garages|several names]] and composed of members of the best bands in the Seattle blunge scene. The team plays exclusively against teams that happen to be in the same city as their Eternal Tour, which lines up perfectly with their League-mandated schedule.
 +
 +
They are also an [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anarcho-syndicalism anarcho-syndicalist collective].
 +
 +
 +
==Staff==
 +
<small>For additional personnel, see [[Seattle Garages/Staff]].</small>
 +
The Seattle Garages have no coach and instead communally coach each other.
 +
 +
 +
==Mascots==
 +
<small>For more on the Garages' mascots, see [[Seattle Garages/Mascots]].</small>
 +
After failing to agree on a single mascot for the whole team due to alleged hotheadedness, the Garages have come to a "temporary" solution where each player has their own mascot who roots for them.
 +
 +
[[Mike Townsend]]'s mascot is often ganged up on by the other 13 mascots, and has had to hire its own security detail.
 +
===List of player mascots===
 +
*Leif - The mascot of Mike Townsend which is a loaf of bread with googly eyes. He was not intended to be one of the Garages' mascots but the concept was repurposed from Townsend's Seattle Bread pitch which was struck down.
 +
*Annie Amp - a Vox AC30 amplifier with googly eyes. Avila Guzman's mascot.
 +
*Seamus the Box of Small Press Comics - a short box of limited run small press comics with googly eyes. Allison Abbott's mascot.
 +
*Rolly Rower - an old rowing machine covered in dust, with googly eyes. Luis Acevedo's mascot.
 +
*Terry Tires - a tire with googly eyes. Oliver Mueller's mascot.
 +
*Fanny Flannel - a flannel jacket with googly eyes. Arturo Huerta's mascot.
 +
* Freezy - a second freezer with googly eyes. Malik Destiny's mascott.
 +
*Spencer the Semi-Sentient Superchunk Poster - a Superchunk tour poster with googly eyes (but not where you think)
 +
* Unnamed Ancient Sarcophagus - an ancient sarcophagus with googly eyes. Tot Clark's mascot.
 +
* Henry Hubcap - a hubcap with googly eyes.
 +
* Carrie T - a non-functioning CRT TV with googly eyes.
 +
*A.C. - an air conditioner with googly eyes.
 +
*Drew the Drawer - a drawer full of skateboard parts with googly eyes. The drawer has googly eyes, not the parts.
 +
*Henry Marshallow is the second Seattle Garages player to serve as his own mascot, gluing giant googly eyes to his pectorals
 +
 +
====Mascots of incinerated players====
 +
*Arthur - an artificial Christmas tree with googly eyes. Bennett Browning's mascot.
 +
*Tiana Cash was the first Seattle Garages player to serve as her own mascot, gluing googly eyes to her own face.
 +
* Wally Workbench - a workbench with googly eyes. Shaquille Torres' mascot.
 +
 +
 +
==Fan Culture==
 +
<small>For a more in-depth look at fan culture, see [[Seattle Garages/Fan Culture]].</small>
 +
 +
The Garages have a die-hard fanbase known as the Band. Many fans are known to camp out in the stands for weeks or even months on end, enjoying games and concerts 24/7. An anonymous superfan who claimed to have lived in seat D20 for the last 93 years was quoted as saying, "They may not win the most games, but they definitely rock the most".
 +
 +
===Chants===
 +
*"PARK IT!"
 +
*"LET'S ROCK!"
 +
*"MONSTERA MASH!"
 +
*"DUENDE!" (excitedly)
 +
* "DERRICK!" (exasperatedly)
 +
*''"TOWNSEND!"'' (more exasperatedly)
 +
*"Please, Blaseball Gods, give us a good pitcher!" (repeated until the words no longer have meaning)
 +
*"PLUG THE BANDS!" (followed by everyone shouting out names of local independent bands)
 +
* "THUMBS UP!"
 +
*''"TOWNSEND!"'' (slightly less exasperatedly)
 +
* "GWIFF DON'T WHIFF!" (a chant for batter [[Greer Gwiffin]])
 +
*"NAIL BAT" (a commonly used chant for batter [[Allison Abbott]])
 +
*"SHAQ ATTAQ" (a commonly used chant for batter [[Shaquille Torres]])
 +
*"LANG GANG" (a commonly used chant for batter [[Lang Richardson]])
 +
*"KING TOT" (a commonly used chant for pitcher [[Tot Clark]])
 +
*"PARK IT" (a chant meant to encourage the current pitcher to strike out opposing batters)
  
−
==Retired Logos==
 
−
{| class="article-table"
 
−
|-
 
−
|'''Main Logo'''
 
−
|'''Alternate Logo'''
 
−
|'''Description'''
 
−
|-
 
−
![[File:Originalseattlegarages.png|center|thumb]]
 
−
!None
 
−
!Some people claim that this is the first Seattle Garages logo, do not believe their lies.
 
−
|-
 
−
![[File:Originalseattlegaragesreallyreal.png|center|thumb]]
 
−
!None
 
−
!The oldest recorded Seattle Garages logo. Dates back to 1926.
 
−
|-
 
−
![[File:Olderseattlegarages.png|thumb]]
 
−
![[File:Olderseattlegaragesalt.png|thumb]]
 
−
!Not the oldest logos of the Seattle Garages, but close. The half circles are holdover from a previous logo inwhich the text itself formed the body of a tow truck with a crane on the right.
 
−
|-
 
−
|[[File:Oldseattlegarages.png|thumb]]
 
−
|[[File:Oldseattlegaragesalt.png|thumb]]
 
−
|Logos from a transitional period for the Seattle Garages where, as a team, they began to start branching into the plunk and blunge rock scenes.
 
−
|}
 
−
<br />
 
 
==Fan Art==
 
==Fan Art==
−
{|
+
See Generalized Seattle Garages fan art [[Seattle Garages/Fan Art|here]]. See player specific fan art on their individual wiki.
−
![[File:Tiana Ron and Mike.jpg|center|thumb|208x208px|Tiana Cash, Ron Monstera, and Mike Townsend of the Seattle Garages by [https://twitter.com/MLeeLunsford @MLeeLunsford]|alt=]]
 
−
![[File:Garages Home Jersey.png|center|thumb|180x180px|Garages Home Jersey by [https://twitter.com/jessegamble/ @jessegamble]|alt=Blue jersey with red Garages logo across front]]
 
−
![[File:Garages bats.png|center|thumb|183x183px|The official bat of the Seattle Garages by [https://twitter.com/jessegamble/ @jessegamble]|alt=An electric guitar with a bat for the fretboard]]
 
−
![[File:AboutASquirrel.png|center|thumb|200x200px|Cover art for "About a Squirrel".|alt=]]
 
−
|-
 
−
![[File:GaragesLogo Cobaltcakes.png|center|thumb|'''Logo by''' [https://twitter.com/4damAvenue Cobaltcakes]]]
 
−
![[File:Blaseball Garages Card.png|center|thumb|Seattle Garages blaseball card outline by [https://twitter.com/MLeeLunsford @MLeeLunsford]]]
 
−
!
 
−
!
 
−
|}
 
  
 
[[Category:Teams]]
 
[[Category:Teams]]
 
[[Category:Chaotic Evil teams]]
 
[[Category:Chaotic Evil teams]]
 +
[[Category:Seattle Garages]]
 +
[[Catagory:Evil Teams]]
  
 
<references />
 
<references />
 
[[Category:Bands]]
 
[[Category:Bands]]

Revision as of 05:14, 15 August 2020

The Seattle Garages are a Blaseball team in the Chaotic Evil division of the Evil League. They have been a part of Internet League Blaseball since Season 1[1].

Roster

Lineup

Pitchers


Former Players

Blessings and Trades

No players on the Seattle Garages have ever left through blessings or trades.

Incinerations

Select Tlopps player cards can be found here.


Season Results

Season Record Win % Place in LC Division Season Notes
1 43-54 .434 5th The Forbidden Book was opened after this season, resulting in the incineration of Jaylen Hotdogfingers
2 46-53 .464 4th
3 48-51 .485 4th

*Season 1 is missing the results of Day 98 and 99's games. Blaseball has been lost.

Team Overview

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

For a more in-depth look at the team, see Seattle Garages/History.

The Garages play their home games at Hotdogfingers Memorial Climate Pledge Garage and Parking Facility, also known as the Big Garage, which is located inside an aircraft hangar, a garage for planes.

The Garages are also a musical supergroup known by several names and composed of members of the best bands in the Seattle blunge scene. The team plays exclusively against teams that happen to be in the same city as their Eternal Tour, which lines up perfectly with their League-mandated schedule.

They are also an anarcho-syndicalist collective.


Staff

For additional personnel, see Seattle Garages/Staff. The Seattle Garages have no coach and instead communally coach each other.


Mascots

For more on the Garages' mascots, see Seattle Garages/Mascots. After failing to agree on a single mascot for the whole team due to alleged hotheadedness, the Garages have come to a "temporary" solution where each player has their own mascot who roots for them.

Mike Townsend's mascot is often ganged up on by the other 13 mascots, and has had to hire its own security detail.

List of player mascots

  • Leif - The mascot of Mike Townsend which is a loaf of bread with googly eyes. He was not intended to be one of the Garages' mascots but the concept was repurposed from Townsend's Seattle Bread pitch which was struck down.
  • Annie Amp - a Vox AC30 amplifier with googly eyes. Avila Guzman's mascot.
  • Seamus the Box of Small Press Comics - a short box of limited run small press comics with googly eyes. Allison Abbott's mascot.
  • Rolly Rower - an old rowing machine covered in dust, with googly eyes. Luis Acevedo's mascot.
  • Terry Tires - a tire with googly eyes. Oliver Mueller's mascot.
  • Fanny Flannel - a flannel jacket with googly eyes. Arturo Huerta's mascot.
  • Freezy - a second freezer with googly eyes. Malik Destiny's mascott.
  • Spencer the Semi-Sentient Superchunk Poster - a Superchunk tour poster with googly eyes (but not where you think)
  • Unnamed Ancient Sarcophagus - an ancient sarcophagus with googly eyes. Tot Clark's mascot.
  • Henry Hubcap - a hubcap with googly eyes.
  • Carrie T - a non-functioning CRT TV with googly eyes.
  • A.C. - an air conditioner with googly eyes.
  • Drew the Drawer - a drawer full of skateboard parts with googly eyes. The drawer has googly eyes, not the parts.
  • Henry Marshallow is the second Seattle Garages player to serve as his own mascot, gluing giant googly eyes to his pectorals

Mascots of incinerated players

  • Arthur - an artificial Christmas tree with googly eyes. Bennett Browning's mascot.
  • Tiana Cash was the first Seattle Garages player to serve as her own mascot, gluing googly eyes to her own face.
  • Wally Workbench - a workbench with googly eyes. Shaquille Torres' mascot.


Fan Culture

For a more in-depth look at fan culture, see Seattle Garages/Fan Culture.

The Garages have a die-hard fanbase known as the Band. Many fans are known to camp out in the stands for weeks or even months on end, enjoying games and concerts 24/7. An anonymous superfan who claimed to have lived in seat D20 for the last 93 years was quoted as saying, "They may not win the most games, but they definitely rock the most".

Chants

  • "PARK IT!"
  • "LET'S ROCK!"
  • "MONSTERA MASH!"
  • "DUENDE!" (excitedly)
  • "DERRICK!" (exasperatedly)
  • "TOWNSEND!" (more exasperatedly)
  • "Please, Blaseball Gods, give us a good pitcher!" (repeated until the words no longer have meaning)
  • "PLUG THE BANDS!" (followed by everyone shouting out names of local independent bands)
  • "THUMBS UP!"
  • "TOWNSEND!" (slightly less exasperatedly)
  • "GWIFF DON'T WHIFF!" (a chant for batter Greer Gwiffin)
  • "NAIL BAT" (a commonly used chant for batter Allison Abbott)
  • "SHAQ ATTAQ" (a commonly used chant for batter Shaquille Torres)
  • "LANG GANG" (a commonly used chant for batter Lang Richardson)
  • "KING TOT" (a commonly used chant for pitcher Tot Clark)
  • "PARK IT" (a chant meant to encourage the current pitcher to strike out opposing batters)

Fan Art

See Generalized Seattle Garages fan art here. See player specific fan art on their individual wiki. Catagory:Evil Teams

  1. ↑ Facts/Lore Disambiguation Guide
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