Kennedy Meh

Kennedy Meh
Art by @Lucacrafts
Basic Information
Position	Lineup Player
Team	Mexico City Wild Wings
Former Team(s)	San Francisco Lovers
Status	Shadowed
Batting
Pitching
Defense
Running
External Links	Blaseball-Reference Player Changes Player Page
Personal Information
Item	None
Armor	None
Evolution	Base
Pregame Ritual	Napping
Coffee Style	Americano
Blood Type	AAA
Fate	59
Soulscream	IAEAEIAEAEIAHAAAAHAAAAAEAIIAEAIIAAXAUAAXAUAAOEAAAOEAAAOIOIOEIOIOEIAUAAAAUAAAA
Biographical Details
Pronouns	He/Him
Personal Relationships
Partners	Knight Urlacher, Milo Brown
Other Background Information
Likes	Hardcore Death Metal, Goth Culture
Dislikes	Sunlight, Wooden Stakes
Player Twitter	@Kenny_meh

Kennedy Meh is a batter for the Mexico City Wild Wings. Prior to that, Meh played for the San Francisco Lovers for most of 7 seasons, having replaced Miguel Javier on Day 11 of Season 3 due to incineration during a game against the Chicago Firefighters. Meh is currently in the Wings' Shadows.

Official League Records

On Season 7, Day 34, Meh siphoned some of Mexico City Mild Wings batter Lawrence Horne's defensive ability in a game with Blooddrain weather. It did not change Meh's defensive star rating.

On Season 8, Day 19, the Hellmouth Sunbeams batter Nerd Pacheco siphoned some of Meh’s hitting ability in a game with Blooddrain weather. This lowered Meh’s hitting rating from 1 to ½ star.

On Season 8, Day 57, Meh siphoned some of Hawaii Fridays batter James Mora’s defensive ability in a game with Blooddrain weather. This raised Meh’s defensive rating from 4½  to 5 stars.

On Season 9, Day 98, Meh was caught in a Feedback event and swapped to the Mexico City Wild Wings in exchange for NaN.

At the end of Season 9 Meh was sent to the Wings's Shadows in return for Fran Beans as a result of the Disappearing Acts blessing.

History

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

As the heir to the meh.com shopping empire, Kennedy was a happy-go-lucky child without a care in the world. He got straight A's in school and was destined to go to College. Everything changed for him, however, when he was one day passing behind the bleachers of Ye Olde San Francisco High. There, a group of goth kids invited Kennedy to partake of ███'s ███████ and listen to hardcore death metal. Eyewitness accounts claim that the moment Kennedy heard the incoherent screaming of the lead singer, his hair grew 5 inches and instantly became black. From this moment on Kennedy was a goth for life.

Now in his early thirties, Kennedy is still a goth. The New San Francisco Journal of Medicine details the symptoms of goth as Apathy, Lethargy and a Penchant for spikes. Despite this, Kennedy still rose to the occasion and now plays blaseball to support his partners Knight Urlacher, whom he met at a Metal Librarians's Club concert, and Milo Brown, whom he developed feelings for on the blaseball field. He tries his best in the name of love, but finds novel concepts like 'effort' difficult to grasp, largely only pushing himself to engage in intimacy out of a desire to replicate the warm, comforting sense of brutally loving community found in the mosh pits of his past.

Several seasons into his tenure as a blaseball player, Kennedy attempted to inform his partners and teammates that he was now a vampire. This was brushed off as Kennedy either joking, buying into the goth thing a little too much, or perhaps experimenting with the “vampyre” subculture, and no one believed him literally.

Kennedy had, in fact, become a real vampire. He’s not sure when exactly it happened, as his pre-existing penchant for avoiding sunlight and the bloodthirst-quenching nature of blaseball made it difficult for him to recognize the change. Suspects for his vampiric sire include a number of local vampires who frequent the San Francisco goth club scene, Beck Whitney, rumored vampire Thomas Dracaena, or possibly even the late Alexandria Dracaena, depending on the unknown length of time that Kennedy has been a vampire.

On the field, Kennedy carries a black parasol to shield himself from the sun, and uses said parasol in place of a bat. This makes him incredibly poor at batting, both due to having the sun in his eyes while batting and due to parasols making poor blaseball bats. He is, however, one of the best defenders in the league, as his vampiric super-reflexes allow him to catch balls one-handed with ease. On cloudy days or in indoor splorts arenas where the parasol isn’t needed, he often favors using his offhand to scroll through social media on his phone instead.

Trivia

• Rumor has it that Milo Brown’s subpar performance may be in part due to anemia caused by his boyfriend’s vampirism. Kennedy denies that he would be that irresponsible with his blood-drinking. Milo denies that Kennedy is a vampire, despite participating in said blood-drinking.

Fanart

• 

  Old Version, Modified Card by @Linktm on Twitter