Kennedy Meh

From Blaseball Wiki

Kennedy Meh is a lineup player for the Mexico City Wild Wings since late Season 9. Meh previously played for the San Francisco Lovers for most of 7 seasons, having replaced Miguel Javier on Season 3, Day 11, due to Javier's incineration during a game against the Chicago Firefighters. Meh is currently in the Wings' Shadows.

Official League Records

On Season 7, Day 34, Meh siphoned some of Mexico City Mild Wings batter Lawrence Horne's defensive ability in a game with Blooddrain weather. It did not change Meh's defensive star rating.

On Season 8, Day 19, the Hellmouth Sunbeams batter Nerd Pacheco siphoned some of Meh’s hitting ability in a game with Blooddrain weather. This lowered Meh’s hitting rating from 1 to ½ star.

On Season 8, Day 57, Meh siphoned some of Hawai'i Fridays batter James Mora’s defensive ability in a game with Blooddrain weather. This raised Meh’s defensive rating from 4½  to 5 stars.

On Season 9, Day 98, Meh was caught in a Feedback event and swapped to the Mexico City Wild Wings in exchange for NaN.

At the end of Season 9 Meh received the Fire Eater modification due to the passing of the Forecast: Eclipse decree. They were then sent to the Wings's Shadows in return for Fran Beans, as a result of the Disappearing Acts blessing.

History

COMMUNITY LORE

The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

How'd You Get So Goth?

As the heir to the meh.com shopping empire, Meh was a happy-go-lucky child without a care in the world. He got straight As in school and was destined to go to College. Everything changed for him, however, when he was one day passing behind the bleachers of Ye Olde San Francisco High. There, a group of goth kids invited Meh to partake of ███'s ███████ and listen to hardcore death metal. Eyewitness accounts claim that the moment Meh heard the incoherent screaming of the lead singer, his hair grew 5 inches and instantly became black. From this moment on, Meh was a goth for life.

What's Not To Love About the Lovers?

Now in his early thirties, Meh is still a goth. The New San Francisco Journal of Medicine details the symptoms of goth as Apathy, Lethargy and a Penchant for spikes. Despite this, Meh still rose to the occasion and now plays blaseball to support his partners Knight Triumphant, whom he met at a Metal Librarians's Club concert, and Milo Brown, for whom he developed feelings on the blaseball field. He tries his best in the name of love, but finds novel concepts like "effort" difficult to grasp, largely only pushing himself to engage in intimacy out of a desire to replicate the warm, comforting sense of brutally loving community found in the mosh pits of his past.

Kennedy's A Vampire Now?

Several seasons into his tenure as a blaseball player, Meh attempted to inform his partners and teammates that he was now a vampire. This was brushed off as Meh either joking, buying into the goth thing a little too much, or perhaps experimenting with the "vampyre" subculture, and no one believed him literally.

Meh had, in fact, become a real vampire. He is not sure when exactly it happened, as his pre-existing penchant for avoiding sunlight and the bloodthirst-quenching nature of blaseball made it difficult for him to recognize the change. Suspects for his vampiric sire include a number of local vampires who frequent the San Francisco goth club scene, Beck Whitney, rumored vampire Thomas Dracaena, or possibly even the late Alexandria Dracaena, depending on the unknown length of time that Meh has been a vampire.

On the field, Meh carries a black parasol to shield himself from the sun, and uses said parasol in place of a bat. This makes him incredibly poor at batting, both due to having the sun in his eyes while batting and due to parasols making poor blaseball bats. He is, however, one of the best defenders in the league, as his vampiric super-reflexes allow him to catch balls one-handed with ease. On cloudy days or in indoor splorts arenas where the parasol isn't needed, he often favors using his offhand to scroll through social media on his phone instead.

Where is The Mehnager?

On Season 9, Day 98, Meh was caught in the Feedback and ended up on the Mexico City Wild Wings. He played a single game with the Wings before being able to convince them that he was actually the Lovers' manager. He insisted that his new placement as a batter in their lineup was a huge mistake and that he would be requiring one of their empty offices so that he could continue to manage the San Francisco Lovers team. This, of course, was all a lie.

Meh now spends most of his time napping in his coffin in his new Manager's Office. Whenever someone knocks on the door and awakens him from his slumber, he promptly shouts, "Leave me alone! I'm busy with uhh... manager stuff." and goes back to sleep. Surprisingly, the Mexico City Wild Wings have not caught on to his scheme.

When Meh isn't spending his time sleeping or avoiding playing Blaseball he can be found visiting Milo Brown and making up excuses to see the San Francisco Lovers. Everyone knows that he secretly misses the team, maybe even playing Blaseball, but they all play along anyways so as not to embarrass him.

Trivia

  • Rumor has it that Milo Brown’s subpar performance may be in part due to anemia caused by his boyfriend's vampirism. Meh denies that he would be that irresponsible with his blood-drinking. Brown denies that Meh is a vampire, despite participating in said blood-drinking.

Fanart