Kline Greenlemon

Kline Greenlemon
Greenlemon as of Season 4, by Hamburgled
Basic Information
Team	Dallas Steaks
Status	Active
Batting
Pitching
Defense
Running
External Links	Blaseball-Reference Player Changes Player Page
Personal Information
Item	None
Armor	None
Evolution	Base
Pregame Ritual	Staring into the souls of their opponents
Coffee Style	Heavy Foam
Blood Type	O
Fate	84
Soulscream	IUEIAIUEIAIEXAAHEXAAHEEHAAOEHAAOEHAAUXHAAUXHAIAUIAIAUIAAUIOOAUIOOAUXAXAUXAXAUIIAXIIIAXIIAIAEIAIAEIA
Biographical Details
Species	Lime

Kline Greenlemon is a lineup player for the Dallas Steaks and has been with the team since Season 3, Day 103, replacing Langley Wheeler due to incineration.

Official League Records

Greenlemon joined the league on Season 3, Day 103, as a -star hitter for the Dallas Steaks.

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Biography

Greenlemon is a sentient, anthropomorphic lime.

Greenlemon’s childhood was spent in their birth country of Argentina with their parents, Cal and Clemintine Greenlemon. The eldest of nine siblings, Greenlemon early on proved to be adept at learning languages through talking with international students at primary school. Thus, when the Greenlemon family was given a chance to immigrate to the Dallas-Fort Worth area, Kline was able to help prepare for the move by teaching their siblings English.

Pre-Blaseball Career

From an early age, Greenlemon learned that their face had a natural tendency to decline into a frown, regardless of their mood. School friends and teachers would often check on them out of concern, even when Greenlemon was feeling cheery. Not wanting to worry anyone around them, Greenlemon began making it a habit to smile often and deliberately, projecting emotions onto their features. Finding pleasure in this act of emoting, Greenlemon felt inclined to begin acting.

Greenlemon’s first acting jobs were television commercials for local small businesses, most prolifically advertising pine air fresheners for the neighborhood car wash. After finding success, Greenlemon moved from Dallas to Los Angeles for larger acting opportunities.  Greenlemon was still living in Los Angeles when the Internet League Blaseball started its first season, and was standing on the corner of Hollywood and Vine on Season 3 Day 73, at the time of The Grand Unslam.

As it happens, the Grand Unslam would end Greenlemon’s acting career. Among the many changes that happened to the Infinite Cit(ies) of Los Angeli, Greenlemon’s facial complexion — formerly a gentle, softly ripe yellow — changed into a more vibrant, saturated green. Coincidentally, Greenlemon’s face was now the exact color used in digital greenscreen effects, making them nearly impossible to film without disappearing into the scenery as an eldritch, half-visible film effect. After a pair of devastating rejections for underwear and soda commercials, Greenlemon decided to return to Dallas-Fort Worth.

Time with the Dallas Steaks

Returning home with their life changed by blaseball, Greenlemon decided to keep in good spirits by learning more about the splort. It was not long before Greenlemon became a common sight as a fan at the George Foreman Stadium. Over the next month, Greenlemon became a supporter of the Grill Master, bringing homemade gifts of tangy marinades and flavorful pour-over juices from their parents’ recipes. As the Season 3 Postseason began, Greenlemon was encouraged to join the Grill Apprenticeship Program, but on their first day they accidentally walked into the dugout entrance instead, becoming a semi-official part of the team. They would be formally added to the team’s line-up during a game against the New York Millennials, following the incineration of Langley Wheeler.

Since joining the team, Greenlemon’s genuine optimism and cheery attitude has made them a clubhouse favorite among fans and teammates alike. Though not a particularly headline hitter for the team, Greenlemon has proven able to clutch games out by scoring in late innings; if not winning the game directly, Greenlemon can be counted on to tie a game up and allow extra innings for their teammates to score. It is generally agreed that Greenlemon’s skills accentuate the Steaks’ individual traits, much in the same way Greenlemon’s homemade marinades accentuate the Grill Master’s cooking. Because playing the splort requires more of Greenlemon’s concentration, their face during a game usually exhibits its natural, frowning expression, though Greenlemon always makes a point to smile if they realize they are showing on the jumbotron.

Personal Life

The Greenlemons are a large family, and while they are always welcome at the George Foreman Stadium, their established tradition is to watch blaseball games together at home. Greenlemon’s parents and siblings each have their own personalized recliner to sit in while they cheer. A notable exemption from this is Kline’s nephew, Stein Greenlemon. Having been close to his uncle his whole life, Stein much prefers to visit the stadium in person.

Off of the field, Greenlemon’s friendship with the Grill Master means they are one of the most likely players to be found spending lunch time with fans after a home game, almost always joined by their nephew Stein. Since Stein spends the games watching with the other fans, joking and sharing gossip, several Greenlemon family rituals are now becoming general Steak fandom rituals, most notably ‘Prank Tio Kline.’ Because Greenlemon always falls for pranks on purpose, anything that Stein found memorably funny generally gets passed around Steak fans and repeated for weeks or months to come, especially when those stories trickle down to fans who live farther away and get repeated at away game meet-ups. It is also an established rule that Greenlemon reacts to every repeated prank as though it was the first time.

In relationships, Greenlemon is happily asexual and aromantic themself, but is always happy to see romance bloom between others. In fact, because of Greenlemon’s natural tendencies to notice good qualities in others and bring them up in compliments, there have been many moments that started as ordinary conversations but transformed into dates after Greenlemon passed by and helped the new couple see each other in fresh lights. It was a long-standing joke among Greenlemon’s younger siblings that it was good luck to invite Kline to third-wheel one of your dates without Kline’s realizing it, and in time the other Steaks have discovered this to be true as well. Therefore the happily single Greenlemon nevertheless ends up eating many fancy dinners and candies during the Valentine holiday season.

Trivia

• Since Greenlemon joined the team not a single member of the Steaks has fallen to scurvy.
• During their acting career, Greenlemon’s commercials for small businesses included: advertising twine at a craft store, promoting a new environmentally-friendly design of alkaline battery, being a spokesperson for the grand opening of an endocrine HRT clinic, and singing a jingle for praline cookies.
• Langley Wheeler’s hoverboard remains hanging in Greenlemon’s locker. Greenlemon has gone on the record saying the thought of removing the hoverboard left, quote, “a sour ache” in their heart.
• Since being introduced to the concept of ‘Prank Tio Kline,’ 7491 Steak fans and counting have gotten Greenlemon’s nose.

Gallery

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  Card by @MLeeLunsford

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  by @KrylonHeretic