Emblem Warhorse/IF-97.72

Patron Rumor / Community Lore
This article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community. It is just one of many Patron Rumors that we've found in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill. You can find more Patron Rumors about Emblem Warhorse at their Patron Rumor Registry.

TOAST GUERTA

Toast Guerta, Around Season 13 (art by glassgoblin)

A recent Patron of the Emblem Warhorse that's a familiar face around the Big Garage.

Toast Guerta was born in Tacoma WA, and having grown up around the Seattle area naturally became a fan of the Garages. Around his 2nd year in college he had been talking to Theodore Duende, who invited him to come aboard at the Big Garage helping out and doing odd jobs. Duende had taken a liking to Toast as he was a photographer for many Garages shows, and thought he'd fit in well. Around Day 45 of Season 9, he began his tenure as a concessions volunteer for the Big Garage, working with other volunteers as he honed his craft and concocted many a cursed brew.

It was here he met many of his greatest friends in the ILB, namely Nic Winkler, Gallup Crueller, Thomas Dracaena, Margarito Nava, as well as all of his teammates that he considers close family.

During the Grand Siesta, Toast had been "promoted" to an volunteer assistant to the players of the Seattle Garages. A job he took steadfast in his dream of playing blaseball one day. He also decided to travel the world in between the time of the Grand Siesta and Season 12. Not much is known about what he did in this time, but during a heavyweight boxing title match in Australia, Toast had gotten into the ring after bribing a promoter $50, and proceeded to beat every challenger, earning the title of Australian Heavyweight Champion. The reason for this new found strength was due to Toast's intense training with the newly expanded Tokyo Lift at their Gym.

Nothing of note occurred from Season 12 to 19 aside from his usual incredibly zany shenanigans. It was only recently, following the tragic passing of his dear friend Sparks Beans that the Warhorse revealed itself to him, where he was able to come to terms with the incineration of his comrade. Upon getting this closure, Toast became a Patron of the Emblem Warhorse, becoming a mainstay there, along with his friends and fellow players.

Toast loves to spend time at the Warhorse, trading stories with the other Patrons.

He has tried to arm wrestle every patron at least once (excluding The Umpire) as well as trying to get them all to drink his latest coffee creation.

He loves to carry War around on his shoulder, spending most of his time petting her, despite the smell of Malik Destiny on him.

Despite Lemon Lime's best efforts she hasn't been able to get him to dance, upon further comment Toast shakes his head due to the terrible nature of his dancing.

He is oblivious to the fact the Ortiz Morse is there, not thinking twice about it.

Toast has played on any campaign Lem will allow him to, despite playing as a chaotic good barbarian every single time.

Incidentally due to the results of the S19 Elections and The Emblem Warhorse being a player, he and some other Patrons have taken it upon themselves to take up the mantle of The Emblem Warhorse and play, fulfilling Toast's lifelong dream of playing Blaseball, and he gets to do it with all the people he's become close with at the Warhorse, and his family at the Big Garage.

Toast's play style is fairly straightforward:

Strikeouts
Homeruns
Singles

Trivia:

Toast has gone on many adventures, his favorite including the stealing of a DewGarita recipe with Jaylen Hotdogfingers.
Despite his best efforts, Toast is trying to get Malik Destiny a patron spot in the Warhorse.
Toast is naturally a brunette, his hair is dyed blue from what he swore was what his favorite player Arturo Huerta, looked like in a camera snap at a Garages show he shot.
His favorite coffee is a concoction of Dark Seattle Espresso and Jet Fuel.
He is credited as the inventor of the Blooddrain Americano.
Toast has a doctorate in Himbology, the study of Himbos.
Toast has worked with the Lil' Roadies in player absences, teaching them some life skills like conflict resolution, how to cook, and how to hotwire a car.
Toast may or may not be quite fond of Arturo Huerta.
Toast coaches a blittle league team in The Core, due to a mix up he has never come clean that he's actually from Seattle.
Toast's boxing record is currently 25-1, the only challenger to beat him is Wyatt Pothos at the Hades Games.
Toast has a fraternal twin, Crêpe.