User:Astrid/XIII draft

At Latesiesta of Season 14, the Breath Mints finished installing their newly-"acquired" PsychoAcoustics system in the Meadow. Shortly thereafter, a loud whine pierced the sky, followed by a crash, a thud, and the clattering of empty Five Loko cans. As the team investigated, they found XIII lying on the floor of Pudge's house on fifth base, beneath a gaping hole (next to the existing, larger hole) in the roof.

XIII spent their first few days dazed and scattered, often seemingly distracted from conversation, and complaining about a severe headache. On Day 77, the headache got a little worse.

Team members were initially hesitant to acknowledge the unexpected addition to the team, although most eventually warmed up to their presence. Oscar Vaughan offered them an old spare room in his apartment, which XIII didn't really know how to react to. They appreciated the hospitality, even if Vaughan could be a little overbearing.

As XIII settled in, they started spending more time at Hewitt Best and Marco Stink's apartment. Best quickly grew fond of the young entity, teaching them theory - both communist and blaseball. Wyatts Mason simply stared at them, intrigued, listening. They also bonded with PolkaDot Zavala and Mooney Doctor II. Apparently they had a group chat - #clonegang, or something. Isn't that funny?

On Day 78, XIII pitched their last game of their short life. They were at the Polyhedron. They were shut out, losing 0 to 2. Fitzgerald Blackburn took them out for ice cream after the game. Everyone just wanted the day to be over.

Over the next few days, it almost felt like they were okay. The team's shared playlist would never be the same again. They made peace with the voices in their head. They tried their hand at cooking. It went alright. PolkaDot Zavala promised to teach them eyeliner, and they had a great time. Leach Ingram was, uh, well, yeah, you know.

On Day 84, XIII was due to pitch against the Shoe Thieves. They were unresponsive that morning. Either way, it's not like the universe cared what they thought. And either way, they never made it to the mound that day.

Trivia

• XIII was originally found lying on the floor of Pudge's house on fifth base.
• XIII's natural hair color is not brown. Pay no mind to the empty cans of hair dye under the counter.
• i'll add more stuff here tomorrow i'm tired.