Parker Parra/IF-59.930

From Blaseball Wiki
Rumor / Community Lore
This article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community. It is just one of many Rumors that we've found in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill. You can find more Rumors about Parker Parra at their Rumor Registry.

Origins - A Mathamatical Improbability

While originating as a 5th dimensional entity, it is rumoured that Parker Parra was summoned to the immaterial plane by a troupe of rogue mathemagicians for some nefarious purpose. The details of the original summoning have been lost however, since the troupe is has not been seen since the ritual was completed, further shrouding them in mystery. There is much speculation on both the nature of the ritual, disappearances, and what entities may have been involved, but when asked for their take on the situation Parker responded that they "couldn’t care less".

Parker's behaviour seems to attest to this attitude as they have taken to the splort of blaseball with glee - taking time in figuring out the intricacies of life in the 3rd dimension and the wonders of the linear passage of time.

A Lover of Origami

Parker Parra has no shadows and the light hits them all wrong. Cameras pointed at them too long really don't like processing what they're seeing and neither do eyes. Crabs fans often don the freely provided solar eclipse glasses when Parra is up to bat even on moonless days.

Parra, Brock Forbes, and Sutton Dreamy share a tight bond over each being a unique dimensional anomaly, a trend among the Crabs that is beginning to look less and less coincidental with time. Parker and Forbes share a love of topology and higher maths, and can often be caught talking vivaciously into the night workshopping paper submissions.

Parraonce asked Forbes about a party trick they showed off in Season 5 when the team was eliminated from the postseason, where he rolled a perfectly spherical joint. Forbes explained that making an infinitesimal fold across all parallel dimensions is isomorphic to a single discrete fold punched through from outside the universe. Parra attempted this fold on the crab they were making at the time, and folded the crustacean inside out, spilling out a fractal of paper legs and antennae that Forbes, reportedly, exclaimed "kinda looks like Mom."

Interest in Hands

Parker and Dreamy, art by@ratgills

In interviews Parker has shown a remarkable interest in hands, often demonstrating their ability to make gestures and pick things up, and describing them as "The perfect adaptation for a 3D life." During a season 7 post-game interview Parker, without prompting, proceeded to list their most interesting experiences with hands. They ranked them as:

Notably, this interview took place while they were holding hands with teammate Sutton Dreamy.