Slosh Truk

From Blaseball Wiki

Slosh Truk is a pitcher for the Canada Moist Talkers, and has been with the team since the ILB Semi-Centennial. Truk has played for the Atlantis Georgias and Rising Stars.

Official League Records

Truk joined the ILB as a player in the Shadows for the Atlantis Georgias during the Descension.

During the Season 13 elections, Truk joined the Georgias' active roster in exchange for Neerie McCloud as a result of the Georgias' Foreshadow will

During the Season 19 earlsiesta, Truk was given the Uncertain modification as part of the seasonal reading.

Truk was traded to the Canada Moist Talkers in exchange for Randy Dennis during the Season 22 elections via the Moist Talkers' Equivalent Exchange will. Truk also gained the Skipping modification as a result of the Record Scratch blessing.

During the ILB Semi-Centennial, Truk played for the Rising Stars. Then Truk returned to the Canada Moist Talkers as a pitcher.

During the Season 23 elections, Truk Evolved to Base 1 as a result of the Moist Talkers' third championship victory.

COMMUNITY LORE

The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Box of Slosh Truk Files

Dust billows as the file box lands on the table. While many archives in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill are unified in some way, this... definitely isn’t one of them. The accompanying Rumor Registry explains all of the contents... wherever it is... but for now you grab the folder labelled IF-92.568 and start reading...

Appearance & Personality

Slosh Truk is an amorphic volume of Ooze™ drink product which habitually forms into an approximately human shape. Xyr body has the appearance of the Ooze Classic™ formulation, a translucent and slightly cloudy green gel. When active or excited (which is most of the time), Truk’s cohesion is less in control, causing xyr body to distort, drip, splash, or… well… slosh. Xe has also been known to take other non-human forms, and seems to think they’re radical, but a humanoid shape is pretty well optimized for blaseball so it is more or less xyr default. The Ooze™ soft drink company ran a marketing campaign in which Truk took the shape of a variety of amusingly cartoonish animals to promote new flavors, which was wildly successful.

Although xe has high surface tension, xe tends to leave a green slimy residue on the things xe touches. Underwater, this slimy coating appears almost as an aura around xem. Xe has been known to slide into blase on a wave of xyr own slime, or slip through the tag with xyr slippery body. Often between games xe can be found relaxing as a puddle in a claw footed bathtub xe had installed in the club house.

Truk tends to be pretty laid back, humorous, relentlessly positive, and particularly fond of pranks, an echo of the over-the-top radical persona that xe puts on for xyr advertising appearances. Xe’s just happy to be there, and loves blaseball and xyr team.

Xe bats with an Ooze™ branded skateboard in lieu of a bat. It remains unclear if this is personal preference, or mandated by the Ooze™ Soft Drink Company marketing department. It is also worth noting that xe can also really shred when necessary.

Backstory

Joshua Turk was a merchant sailor in the early 19th century who drowned somewhere in the Atlantic. In death his spirit clung to his corpse on the seafloor, then his bones, and then finally to the sediment his bones became as nature did its grim work.

When the Ooze™ soft drink company hoovered this sediment up decades later to become part of their flagship drink, even after it was irradiated, sweetened, and augmented with 37 secret flavoring agents, the spirit of Josh Turk remained in some distorted way. The test kitchen scientists were astonished and frankly baffled by a big vat of Ooze™ that began to wriggle, bubble, and eventually speak in a slurred voice, claiming to be (in their words) “ ‘osh trk”. They scratched their heads and kicked it up the corporate ladder.

The Ooze Co. marketing division couldn’t believe its luck. Here they had a walking, talking, example of their product that didn’t take up any of the acting budget, or the CGI budget, and was also pretty decent at their inter-office blaseball beer league. They quickly put the proposition to be the Ooze ™ mascott to the somewhat addled Truk, who gladly accepted and slipped into xyr new lease on life with gusto. A few years later, at the marketing departments urging, xe also managed to break into professional blaseball, and xe has played for the Georgias ever since.


Fan Works