Beasley Day/IF-38.259

Rumor / Community Lore
This article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community. It is just one of many Rumors that we've found in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill. You can find more Rumors about Beasley Day at their Rumor Registry.

Movie Star Good Boy

Continuing the tradition of Pies’ participation in cinema, Day is an incredibly prominent canine movie star. He stared in a Woodman original movie, called Top Dog, written by roommates Lang Richardson and Ruslan Greatness.

In the movie he wore three pairs of mirrored sunglasses and a custom crafted suit and tie. The movie won tons of awards, due to Beasley’s performance and the amazing plot, written by Lang. Lang refused to write dog related puns, so he put down placeholders where Ruslan would write the jokes. Although it resulted in grammatical inconsistencies, the puns were the funniest thing ever written. Many sources said that the jokes were not intentional, and Ruslan was just filling in the natural dialogue.

The plot of the movie is: All of the Pies work for a secret agency called P.I.E. (Philadelphia Intel Examination), where they try to uncover mysteries and stop nasty crime guys. Yusef Puddles hacks into space and sees that the moon's evil twin "The Noom" is attempting to enter Earth's atmosphere to end all blaseball.

In the end, the pies beat the noom by using the power of friendship. It ends with a cliffhanger where Yusef hacks into the Noom and sees that the noom was under the coin's payroll. Since this movie takes place in between the s14 finals and the election, Jessica Telephone skates into the P.I.E. headquarters and says "Heard you guys pies need some help" in a post credits scene. The movie was instantly renewed for a sequel.

The US government refused to help supply military equipment and funding for the film, because they were uncertain where P.I.E. fit into the US armed services. When the concern was raised, reportedly, all of Beasley’s heads barked continuously until they left. All required funding was skimmed of the top of the My Roomie Ruslan Reboot’s crowdfunding, with the promise the money would be returned after the inevitable box office success.

In addition, Beasley has gone on to play every single dog in the Jlohn Wick series, assisted by CGI. He has also done extensive mo-cap work for canine video game characters. Rumors of a Beasley day cameo in My Roomie Ruslan season ten have been circulating since the season’s announcement, but everyone involved has remained tight lipped up until this point.