Kennedy Loser/IF-69.726

Rumor / Community Lore
This article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community. It is just one of many Rumors that we've found in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill. You can find more Rumors about Kennedy Loser at their Rumor Registry.

Captain and Dad

Kennedy Loser co-captains the Baltimore Crabs alongside Forrest Best and Brock Forbes. The general triumverate of co-captaining is that Kennedy and Forrest are the emotional pillars, here to support the team on a personal level, Kennedy and Brock are representative pillars, handling most of the on-paper team management, and Forrest and Brock are the protective pillars, doing the hands-on work against literal hostile forces that threaten the team. Combs Duende was the sole team captain up until their incineration, and Kennedy quickly and sloppily took the role, biting off way more than he could chew. The others stepped up after the Crabs had been spiralling for much of that season.

Kennedy Loser compulsively copes with stress by externalizing his focus to caring for others, especially so now that he holds teamwide responsibilities. He has become "everyone's dad" in a way that is both endearing but also exhausting, but he loves his fellow and former Crabs so much that he couldn't imagine it being any other way for the longest time. Much of his responsibilities as a captain involve micromanaging the Crabs to maximize having all of their needs met and comforts accounted for through a series of complex nested juggling acts. This process became significantly easier and more streamlined once Tillman Henderson was incinerated, to the point where Kennedy felt empty inside, because so much of his daily energy had been dedicated toward herding him around to minimize damage.

After repeatedly getting tageted by blood drain in season 10, both he and the rest of the Crabs realized that he was pushing himself too hard. As the team prepared for ascension, he tried to reconnect with the Crabs in a way that doesn't feel so one-sided, but had a profoundly difficult time not being seen as a surrogate father. This twelveish-person coming of age experience for the other Crabs has been difficult, as all coming of ages are and at any age they may happen, but, nevertheless, there is progress. Since ascension, there have been no reports back from the team, so nobody knows if they're all a little more comfortable with each other yet or not.