Kennedy Loser/IF-65.408

Rumor / Community Lore
This article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community. It is just one of many Rumors that we've found in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill. You can find more Rumors about Kennedy Loser at their Rumor Registry.

Marriage

Kennedy is married. This came as a surprise to many of the Crabs, who did not even realize that he was married to the person he kept bringing over to their gatherings, until the very day of ascension when he brought up in conversation, "I am going to miss my husband." Kennedy's husband is named Terry. They love each other very much. Terry doesn't really 'get' the whole blaseball thing, but hey, it's Ken's job, and they want to be supportive.

Terry is short for

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Nissan Xterra Loser. In interviews, they explained, "When I was going in for my name change, I didn't know what to go with so I picked out the first thing that I saw." Court records state that the judge suggested they take some more time for deeper consideration, to which they responded "Screw you," and proceeded to punch the district judge in the mouth. Ever since then, they stuck with the name as an act of spite against the legal system and its expectations of normativity. They are a modestly successful tattoo artist and engraver who specializes in working over carcinized skin and shell.

Supposedly the two of them met at a riot, but it wasn't a particularly cordial first impression. Kennedy was performing street medic duties (because of course he does) when Terry got in a heated argument with him about whether the water-antacid solution works against pepper spray or if it's a myth and regular saline is preferable, all while writhing on the asphalt. When they met again on a proper date (at the insistence of a mutual friend), they eventually recognized each other from that time and it was really embarrassing.