HELIOLATRY

HELIOATRY is a Hellmouth originated, largely monothestic religion based on the Sun, the Sun's glory, and the Sun's effect on the earth. It's adherents are largely associated with the Hellmouth Sunbeams. Believers of HELIOATRY are largely focused in the Hellmouth area, with little to no effort being seen thus far to spread to convert other blaseball teams or spread the religion to other areas. Believers of HELIOATRY state that even without additional effort, HELIOATRY is inevitable, as the sun is objectively real, very large and glorious, and an "unstoppable force of blaseball power."

History

Although many claim that HELIOATRY has always existed, as it is only natural to worship the glorious Sun, the beginings of modern (loosely) organized HELIOATRY began sometime after the Hellmouth opened, as a result of the opening of the Forbidden Book. During this period of confusion and fear for the residents of what was once a normal Utah town, a "shining specter" was said to appear, extending one of it's many hands and "guiding those who lived in the flames into a new and purer light." The identity of this founder is unknown, but was said to be "Radiant, glorious, charismatic, many armed, and had a strange tendency to always speak in ALL CAPS."

After the formation of HELIOATRY, the Glorious Founder was said to ascend bodily into the Sun, leaving the people below to follow in it's mighty footsteps. Some take this as proof that the Founder was the child of the Sun, brought down to guide it's chosen people to a new, warmer world. Some claim this is proof of the nature of incineration, and that all blaseball players who are struck down by rogue umpire have followed the Founder into the arms of the Sun. Some even go so far to claim that when an umpire goes wrote, it has become possessed by the Glorious Founder, who is selecting new people to become the Saints of HELIOATRY (but unfortunately, none of them were able to withstand the Glorious Founders light).

You will never find anyone who claims that the Glorious Founder merely put on a pretty light show, threw some smoke bombs, and simply ran away while everyone was distracted and has been living^{[citation needed]} in secret among us by wearing a pair of shades and going by a new name, as everyone who dared to claim this has been aggressively and thoroughly silenced.

After the disappearance of the Glorious Founder, HELIOATRY promptly spit into multiple denominations of worship, commonly referred to as "sects." Each sect has their own unique belief system and styles of worship, and may or may not interact, acknowledge, or respect branches outside of their own. Some sects allow for overlap with others, while some are largely ostracized by anyone outside their group.

Sects

There are many different Sects of HELIOATRY, all of them coming to light after the absence of the Glorious Founder. Some of the most popular sects, having a wide amount of worshipers in the Hellmouth area, are listed below. HELIOACTRY is constantly expanding, however, and has an unusual amount of enthusiasm to the creation of new sects, saying that "As the Sun has so many beams with which to reach out and touch our minds, So will we have many beams to reach out and touch the hearts of believers." Therefore, categorization of all possible branches is considered challenging, if not entirely impossible.

The Lunar Apologists

The defining characteristic of the Lunar Apologist sect is the worshiping of the Moon alongside the Sun, which is seen as a highly controversial, even blasphemous suggestion by some leaders of the main branch of HELIOACTRY. The Lunar Apologists believe that after the opening of the Forbidden Book, the hunger of Hell was awoken like a beast from slumber, and the mouth opened to consume the greatest source of power and energy that it could find; the Sun, which the Lunar Apologists refer to as "Sol, Lightbringer and Protector." So strong was the appetite of Hell, it is said, that Sol asked Luna, it's companion in the sky, for sanctuary. Luna complied, and hid Sol from the Hellmouth's sight, beginning an unending eclipse over the people below. It is said that if Luna achieves in starving out the Hellmouth, unable to feast on Sol's power, then Sol will be able to return to the sky.

The Dusk Conspiracy

The Dusk conspiracy, although considered "unsual" by many main believers of HELIOATRY, is a surprisingly popular Sect, and bares some resemblance to the Lunar Apologists in their more sympathetic view of the night. Members of the Dusk Conspiracy believe that it is their mission to call the Light back into the world, and work through the night to ensure that the sun will rise the next morning. Unlike other sects, members avoid the light, fearing a form of retaliation if they are seen not preforming their duties, and live by candlelight and vitamin D tablets, emerging only as the sun sets. Some naysayers of this cult say that the nocturnal habits of the Dusk Conspiracy are born not of any particular belief, but of necessity, and the claims that they need to avoid the light for their "safety" are a cover for their true, not-so-human nature. Members of the Dusk Conspiracy firmly deny this, however, and state that evidence presented of them avoiding garlic, crosses, running rivers, and a previous fear of the Dallas Steaks due to a brief misprinting in the local newspaper are "just wacky coincidences." One member of the Dusk Conspiracy, speaking to our investigator through a heavy curtain in front of their window, stated, "it's absolute slander, is what it is, pure slander, and they'll be hearing from my lawyer. You just wait, the moment the sun sets, they'll be getting a strongly worded letter."

Siblings of Solar Exposure

The Siblings, commonly recognized as the more fashion-forward believers of HELIOATRY believe that one’s choice in clothing serves as a form of prayer, and the choice of what you wear, and how, has specific meaning in regards to your relationship to the Sun. Choosing how the light shines on you is considered a form of creative expression, indicating how you would like the sun to help you; For example, a bare head might indicate a prayer for knowledge, and an exposed thigh is a popular choice for blaseball players hoping for extra running power. It is said that the more one focuses on one body part, the stronger the sun’s gift will be. Fashion plays a large part in the hierarchy of the siblings, and is constantly in rotation (Although crop tops are very frequently popular). As a result, the Siblings often unintentionally determine Hellmouth fashion trends, and many lead magazines attempt to track the Sibling's and their current forms of worship to try and keep ahead of new styles.

The Gilded Hand

Members of the Gilded Hand are often hard to miss around the Hellmouth, often being draped in many layers of finery despite the oppressive heat of the sun, but many do not realize the more humbly dressed person standing right beside them could be a believer as well. The GIlded hand believes in the acquisition of material goods above all else, but do not hoard and covet wealth for its own sake. Instead, Acquisitions are meant to be spent for the good of Sol and its Adherents, including other sects. Coins, as such, should be spent before the end of each Blaseball Election, both to prevent hoarding, and as a practical way to prevent being Redistributed to those less worthy. Members of the sect are expected to either eschew quality clothing for the betterment of Hellmouth or to dress in incredibly gaudy and expensive clothes, to show how much wealth they have acquired for Sol.

Photosynthetics

Photosynthetics is a reletively new sect of HELIOATRY, and as such little is known about it, but it has grown rather rapidly among people who, in their own words, "just really like plants." As can be deduced from this statement, Photosynthetics is characterized by it's worship of plants alongside the Sun, and the view that Photosynthesis is the ultimate form of worship. As one member put it, "I mean, we're all trying to become more like the Sun, right? And Photosynthesis is literally absorbing the Sun. I mean, you just don't get more sun than that." This Sect was said to have formed accidentally by Sunbeams player Eugenia Bickle after one of her garden parties hosted for her teammates and their fans, although queries on what sort of garden party gets mistaken for a cult meeting have remained unanswered, and Bickle declined to comment on the matter.

Children of the Bright Light

Not much is known about the Sect referred to as the "Children of the Bright Light," as most other sects are hesitant to talk about (or even acknowledge) them, and it's believers (commonly referred to as the 'Pale Eyed') are generally too busy staring into the sun and chanting ominously to themselves to be questioned. The few who were willing to discuss the Pale Eyed referred to them as "kinda freaky" and "a little much," and stated "I know we're a cult and everything, but like... come on, guys. You're making the rest of us look bad." One of the few things known is the initiation process, which involves staring into the sun until the "Sun has entered you," which will be represented by the new recruit becoming almost, if not entirely, blinded by the light. According to believers, they are not blinded at all, but merely cleansed of all sights that "it's holy rays did not approve." One investigator, for the sake of research, went through the initiation process, and was last seen wandering through the Hellmouth, smiling broadly, staring at nothing. When approached by fellow investigators, who made comments such as "where have you been," "your family was so worried about you," and "please, please come home," the former investigator only replied, "I'm here. I have always been here."

Any further investigation into the Children of the Bright Light has been strictly banned, and all mistaken tourists to Hellmouth will be prevented from interacting with the Pale Eyed by any means necessary.

Controversy

Despite the general laid-back nature of the inhabitants of the Hellmouth, including among it's worshipers of HELIOATRY, there are many who claim HELIOATRY is not a religion so much as a cult; a social group that is defined by its unusual religious, spiritual, or philosophical beliefs, or by its common interest in a particular personality, object or goal. People claiming this often point to the fact that worshipers commonly refer to it as the "HELIOATRY cult," claim to be members of a cult, wear t-shirts that bear messages such as "ASK ME ABOUT THE CULT I'M IN," and say things such as, "Oh, yes, I absolutely believe in HELIOATRY, and for the record it's a cult. Just in case you were confused- this is absolutely a cult." Although there is no real evidence that HELIOATRY is a cult aside from word of mouth and blatant confessions from the members, many take a negative view of HELIOATRY due to this belief.

When asked to comment on if claims of HELIOATRY being a cult are truthful, a Solcerer who chose to remain anonymous said, "well, what is a cult, really, when you think about it? I mean, a lot of things seem sort of strange or unusual to people outside of it, but that's because they're outside of it, you know? You have to keep an open mind about things, because that's how the sun gets in. You keep an open mind, and the sun crawls in through your eyes and into your mind. It's here now, it's inside me, there's no much light inside me and it is bright and terrible and holy. Would you like to see? Would you like to see the sun? Would you like to feel the sun the sun the sun the sun THE SUN THE SUN THE-"

The investigator then inquired about the patch on the Solcerer's jacket that said "HELIOATRY is a cult, I lead a cult, AMA," but the interviewee was unable to comment, due to being too busy chanting, howling, and gazing at the Sun.