Luis Acevedo/IF-44.891

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Rumor / Community Lore
This article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community. It is just one of many Rumors that we've found in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill. You can find more Rumors about Luis Acevedo at their Rumor Registry.

Contractual Gender Consumption

By reading this page, you have agreed to the terms and conditions that cede your gender over to Luis Acevedo for the purposes of consumption, and nothing else. Be advised that Luis Acevedo receives no nutritional benefit from eating your gender, and merely does it for splort. There will be no compensation. (See Clause One for compensation.) Please head to the Crabitat, the Wormhole, or the Big Garage in a timely manner. If you do not proceed to these locations in a timely manner, your gender will still be consumed. It is inevitable.

The ILB is not responsible for any side effects that come with the consumption of your gender, including the inability to be referred to using any pronouns, the loss of your name, or, in rare and occasionally fatal cases, the inability to be perceived by anyone with a concept of “gender.” If you have any complaints, simply stop having them, or report them to [email protected]. We will not get back to you.

Clause One: If compensation for consumption of gender is requested, you will receive a Luis Acevedo-patterned binder. There are no returns for this item. If you throw away this item, it will reappear back in your dresser. Feel free to sell it on E-Blay; however, it will be returned to you in four to seven business days.

On Death

On the event of Luis Acevedo’s death, a failsafe clause will be triggered that may result in a discharge of additional genders being kept by Mx Acevedo. The ILB is not responsible for the results of any “Gender Shrapnel” that may cause guests, players, or staff to gain or lose genders, and is not liable for any damage, insight, or internal revelations cause by the death of Mx. Acevedo.