FASHION

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Fashion in containment
Affiliation	Mascot
Biographical information
Date of birth	Season 10, Day X
Place of birth	Halifax
Date of death	Eternal
Physical description
Species	Clroc Homunculi
Gender	Fashion
Height	The perfect height
Weight	The Perfect weight
Eye color	Hole

Manifestation

The Ephemeral Spirit of Fashion, often pronounced FASHION™®© apparated in Halifax shortly after Season 10 concluded, with the primary belief of it's manifestation being that the large concentration of fans being obsessed with awful fashion choices made it decide to roll up its sleeves and fix this itself.

A secondary theory is that Fish Summer ripped FASHION™®© into Halifax by finally becoming Too Hot.

Appearance

Given the nature of the concept of FASHION™®© being entirely subjective to mortals, it is difficult to nail a true form to FASHION™®© and as such we set out to capture it's true form, and at the cost of most of our photography equipment, we were able to capture this one picture. Unfortunately, as such, comes with the downside of being unable to capture photographs of FASHION™®© as seen by fans, and as such have hired a professional investigator to get a comprehensive look at each of the teams' fans' views of FASHION™®©

It must be noted that every answer is seen on an exceptionally attractive department store mannequin, which no one has ever seen move but seems to be mobile, unless otherwise stated

Canada Moist Talkers: All fans of the Moist Talkers demand I clarify that the following is Absolutely Soaked: All brown/black, wool sweaters, black pants, and holding a coffee cup. When I asked what was in the cup, I was told "What do you think?" Any other team, and it would be coffee, but I think we all know what's in this one

Miami Dalé: The fans of the Dalé were too busy celebrating with loud singing of any song that has [feat. Pitbull] in the title (note: no appearance of any song actually made by Pitbull) to respond, but I did receive texts from every person I asked linking https://www.pinterest.com/miamidale/. It is worth noting that I did not give out my number.

Chicago Firefighters: When asked, Firefighters provided the resounding answer of "Ya know, like a supa [sic] hot fiya [sic] fighta [sic]." From what I have gathered, it seems they see an extremely attractive firefighter, as if ripped from the pages of a model calendar, with several notable differences. Firstly is that his hat is insanely large, as if it were a 10-gallon hat made to deter flames. Of course the jacket is always open and flowing in the wind, and underneath is exclusively the WE ARE FROM CHICAGO booty shorts available at "Ya know, dat blaseball fan merch stoah thingy"

Kansas City Breath Mints: The most straightforward answer so far, every fan saw the mannequin as wearing the Blaseball Cares Bomber Jacket made for the Mints, as well as an outstanding pair of JNCO Jeans, which seems to be a common thread in many later teams.

Boston Flowers: The Flowers fans truly show what they follow the team for in this instance, as their answer was an absolutely delightful bouquet of clothing, with laurels, flower crowns, and dresses that have "Every kind of flower in the pattern." The fans have also noted a leather string bracelet with beads that appear to contain flower seeds of different varieties.

Hawai'i Fridays: I was surprised by the Fridays fans, as they were EXTREMELY passionate with their response, almost as if they saw the epitome of laid-back, and now must strive to reach it. The fans seem to have seen "aloha shirts, NEVER buttoned, above the knee floral cargo shorts, and NO SHOES. EVER." When I asked a fan whether the floral pattern was matching across items, I was immediately ejected from the stadium, a first in Fridays history.

Seattle Garages: All Garages fans were able to sum up the mascot in 3 words: "Punk As Hell." The Garages seem to see
FASHION™®© as a mohawked mannequin, with ripped jeans, a flannel tied around its waist, a studded leather jacket held over the shoulder passively, and specifically one Doc Marten shoe, and one Chuck Taylor shoe. All fans are insistent that all of this is bought from a thrift shop, although could not clarify how they knew when asked.

Breckenridge Jazz Hands: The Jazz Hands seem to have never left behind their flare for the dramatic, as when I asked what FASHION™®© was to them, they informed me that the mannequin was wearing either a dress made entirely out of rhinestones, or a tuxedo where every component is fully sequined, and I must say, this sounds like it is only marginally more painful to wear than it is to look at, but hey, I guess they always say FASHION™®© is pain.

Tokyo Lift: I asked a single fan and immediately everyone in the stadium started chanting "HIT MAN HART" for the next three hours, which I assume means that they see FASHION™®© as the literal form of Bret 'The Hitman' Hart, which suddenly makes their whole color scheme make sense

San Francisco Lovers: Keeping with the very strong Medieval vibe that the fans tend to have, this mannequin is seen with hot pink gauntlets and greaves, evidently not being used for protection, as the rest of the outfit is a pink pinstripe suit that has been, somehow, made into a crop top. Some fans have reported that when they look at the mannequin, it sometimes drops a sword-shaped blaseball bat, which has alarming implications about both FASHION™®©'s abilities, and also the fact that the fans see a weapon as peak fashion.

Yellowstone Magic: As expected, a wizard aesthetic is what the Magic see. Absolutely coated head to toe in moss, fashioned into capes, hiking boots, and an ascot. Concerningly, all of this has a fine patter of blood as an overcoat, particularly the ascot. There is also a concerning amount of bones, and a staff made of pruining shears, unclear if there is blood present there. Also mentioned is Bears, but when asked for clarification, every fan just repeated BEAR in a low monotone.

New York Millenials: In a strange and non-euclidian twist, the entirety of the fanbase sees FASHION™®© as an entire thrift store. Some contents from what I could gather are flannel shirts, jackets, socks, boxers, and hats, a bunch of Macklemore CDs, one spool of brown thread (half used), a paperclip, and kilts.

Philadelphia Pies: The Pies have the most... interesting response so far. Apparently the team sees FASHION™®© as wearing a large pair of JNCO jeans, a tuxedo print shirt that has been turned into a tank top through unclear means, an apron (presumably to protect these precious items of clothing during baking), and a battle jacket with "too many" patches. One fan said they saw the mannequin as wearing "Whipped cream," but when asked for clarification was immediately ejected from the stadium.

Dallas Steaks: True to their name, the Dads of Dallas see FASHION™®© as wearing a kiss the cook apron, hawaiian shirt (entirely buttoned), cargo shorts (khaki), socks and sandals, and a hat that reads "Women want me, Fish fear me" (which I do not recommend wearing to Gleek Arena, as Fish is a very literal person). This very similar look to the Fridays concerns me, especially with the extremely uncharacteristic fervor the Fridays have shown.

Hellmouth Sunbeams: Despite how hot a Hellmouth in the middle of a desert can get, the fans see Layers as the be all end all apparently, as they see a robed figure, wearing booty shorts (assumed to be blaseball cares merch) and a crop top over the robes, as well as the bomber jacket from blaseball cares, adorned with bones (When asked if the bones were jewelry, I was laughed at, when asked if they were animal bones, the laughter intensified. I am afraid.) an indeterminate amount of rings, often stated as MANY, and seem to be glowing from underneath the robes, assumed to be some sort of lighting.

Unlimited Tacos: The shortest answer, yet the most striking description of all: 90's Taco Bell. I can only picture the jazz design on every item accompanied with randomly colored Loud shapes.

Charleston Shoe Thieves: Being a personal fan of the Shoe Thieves, I can answer this one quickly. FASHION™®© is exactly what you'd expect and the last thing you want: Just shoes, nothing else, but those shoes are the freshest kicks you own.

Hades Tigers: This one is interesting; if any more than one Tigers fan enters Gleek Arena while FASHION™®© is manifested, a piercing screech rings out, and does not stop until at most one fan remains, given an immense divide in fashion between two factions of fans: One faction sees FASHION™®© as a canadian tuxedo (terminology used by the fans) over a crop top, with the denim jacket being the Landry Violence jacket, while the other faction sees what can only be described as "An outfit of the Utmost EXXTRAVAGENCEEE [sic]." This causes FASHION™®© to flicker bouncing between 3 forms at all times, and causes immense pain.

Mexico City Wild Wings: All reports suggest that the following is entirely "soaked in hot sauce stains" which I am struggling to comprehend; A cape entirely formed of wet napkins (asked for clarification on whether they meant moist towelettes, was assured they meant wet napkins, "but not the paper kind"), a graphic flames tee, cargo jorts, frosted tips, a visor, wraparound sunglasses, and chicken bucket boots, "but with holes for the toes, and the bottom is the lid." I am currently attempting to verify whether or not this is FASHION™®©, or Guy Flieri visiting Gleek Arena for his blaseball-themed show.

Houston Spies: This is without a doubt the hardest Ive ever worked for a job. The spies were the first ones I interviewed, and they only responded with blinking in code. After 20,000 fans had passed, I had a code that I took to a professional decryptor, who provided me with a riddle, which led me to 3 different websites, which gave me another code which led me to a 4th website that was running an emulation of the Atari game missile command, which I had to beat 3 times in a row in order to be given this image: