Dark Seattle Corporates/IF-97.004

Rumor / Community Lore
This article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community. It is just one of many Rumors that we've found in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill. You can find more Rumors about Dark Seattle Corporates at their Rumor Registry.

NAME: TOWNSEND, MIKE

POSITION: BATTER

DATE ONBOARDED:  SEASON 0 DAY 97 (████████)

BIOGRAPHICAL INFORMATION:

TOWNSEND is the main promotional lead for Townsend Confectionery, a line of baking products sold in a variety of Corporation establishments. His main roles are in product development and in advertising, and he is rarely seen outside of STUDIO 14-E’s test kitchen.

Note: Record information about the ████████ cloning experiment has evidently been lost. ████████████████ has been assigned to recover damaged data, but in the interim, it is unclear in this database which iteration of TOWNSEND is the original and which are clones. FIX THIS LATER.