Difference between revisions of "Moist Owlette"

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The Moist Owlette replaced the [[Belligerent Phlegm Receptacle]] at the start of Season 3. Why this change was made official has been a major cause for controversy within not only the Moist Talkers organization itself, but the Blaseball universe as a whole.  
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The Moist Owlette replaced the [[Belligerent Phlegm Receptacle]] at the start of Season 3. The reason behind this change has been a major cause for controversy within not only the Moist Talkers organization itself, but the Blaseball universe as a whole.  
  
==The Theories==
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==Major Theories==
  
*The team wanted to change the mascot to something more kid friendly, so that parents would be more inclined to bring their children to games. The Moist Talkers had one of the lowest attendance rates in the 0-13 demographic in Season 2, and felt it was time to shift focus.  
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*Seeing one of the lowest attendance rates in the 0-13 demographic in Season 2, the Moist Talkers mascot was changed to something that would be more attractive to parents, and help bolster sales of merchandise.
  
*It has been well documented that [[PolkaDot Patterson]]'s hair is insured for $10,000 and dunking their entire head into a fountain full of saliva every game would mean ''a lot'' of insurance payments.  
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*[[PolkaDot Patterson]]'s hair is insured for $10,000 and the repeated act of dunking their entire head into a fountain full of saliva could have been seen as an untenable liability.
  
*Perhaps the most far-fetched theory of them all, there has been speculation that a child was eaten by the Belligerent Phlegm Receptacle in Season 2. The incident in question involved the child of a member of the [[Halifax Mob]], who control all of the sales of cheese-related items at the park. This has been said to put a major strain on the relationship between the Moist Talkers and the Halifax mob, causing the Moist Talkers to pay significantly more money to the Halifax Mob for the same quality and amount of cheese as a means of paying them to cover up the death of the child. The rumours of trench coat clad figures tossing oddly lumpy garbage bags into the BPR in the dead of night are simply rumours, and stadium staff would appreciate it if you stopped asking them about it.  
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*A fringe theory states that the disappearance of 11 year old Harry Halifax, during Season 2, was due to the Belligerent Phlegm Receptacle. Halifax, a child of the [[Halifax Mob]], disappeared shortly after a Moist Talker game. Proponents of this theory state that financial records showing  a steep increase in price for cheese provided by the mob point to a strained relationship with the team. The rumours of trench coat clad figures tossing oddly lumpy garbage bags into the BPR in the dead of night are simply rumours, and stadium staff would appreciate it if you stopped asking them about it.
  
 
[[Category:Canada]]
 
[[Category:Canada]]
 
[[Category:Mascots]]
 
[[Category:Mascots]]

Revision as of 05:28, 3 August 2020


The Moist Owlette replaced the Belligerent Phlegm Receptacle at the start of Season 3. The reason behind this change has been a major cause for controversy within not only the Moist Talkers organization itself, but the Blaseball universe as a whole.

Major Theories

  • Seeing one of the lowest attendance rates in the 0-13 demographic in Season 2, the Moist Talkers mascot was changed to something that would be more attractive to parents, and help bolster sales of merchandise.
  • PolkaDot Patterson's hair is insured for $10,000 and the repeated act of dunking their entire head into a fountain full of saliva could have been seen as an untenable liability.
  • A fringe theory states that the disappearance of 11 year old Harry Halifax, during Season 2, was due to the Belligerent Phlegm Receptacle. Halifax, a child of the Halifax Mob, disappeared shortly after a Moist Talker game. Proponents of this theory state that financial records showing a steep increase in price for cheese provided by the mob point to a strained relationship with the team. The rumours of trench coat clad figures tossing oddly lumpy garbage bags into the BPR in the dead of night are simply rumours, and stadium staff would appreciate it if you stopped asking them about it.