Kaz Fiasco/IF-64.752

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< Kaz Fiasco

Revision as of 04:35, 2 June 2021 by Snerkus (talk | contribs) (adding content warnings in line with the new style guide)

Rumor / Community Lore
This article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community. It is just one of many Rumors that we've found in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill. You can find more Rumors about Kaz Fiasco at their Rumor Registry.

History

Before being recruited to the Ohio Worms, Kaz Fiasco was a small time stage magician known for both his "Gallagher-esque" stage performances, and also resulting criminal record.

Magician

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As a magician, Kaz's performances involved many fireworks, used in exclusively unsafe manners. His "hammer-o-matic" routine, in which he took a baseball bat to various fireworks alongside passable jokes, both delighted and terrified crowds (correlating directly with proximity to the stage), and eventually led to his dishonorable discharge from the Magician's Corps after one particularly tragic performance. When asked to comment by a local paper, Kaz simply repeated his famous catchphrase (removed for clarity) and sadly drove his garish sedan away.

Criminal

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This wiki entry contains the following: misuse of fireworks, theft, minor mention of police.

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After losing his Magician's License, Kaz turned his pyrotechnic skills towards crime, amassing a several hundred dollar fortune from a multi-state petty crime spree in which he robbed several firework stores, atms, and banks, all through creative and ill-advised fireworks use (as well as baseball bat use). He was finally apprehended trying to Roman Candle through a bank vault door, after one of his pinwheel fireworks set off a silent alarm (which Kaz, to this day, insists should be illegal). When read his Miranda rights by the arresting officers, Kaz once again repeated his catchphrase, to the displeasure of everyone involved.

The ILB

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After two decades in "the big house" Kaz was finally granted parole, and was soon recruited by the Ohio Worms for his skill with a baseball bat, as well as his skill in running from the law. Kaz enjoyed a relatively successful career as a part of several championship winning teams, and will be tragically killed when his gunpowder-corked bat misfires during a future ILB season.

Appearance

In his time at the ILB, Kaz was renowned for his button-up shirts and his silver fox charm, as well as the iconic scorched crater he will leave in his wake.