Talk:Houston Spies/Archive

Welcome to the Houston Spies talk page. I thought this might be a good place to put down some stuff that comes from the discord channel that won't be outright stated on the page (because we're sneaky). This stuff is as canon as you want it to be - it's collaborative storytelling! If you have a fun idea go with it! Canonically I think it's OK for there to be contradictory information about the Spies circulating - we start fake rumours all the time!

• Why Houston? Does it have something to do with Houston's association with space travel? Are we/our management aliens who came to earth on a returning space shuttle? Who could say :)
• We never even said which Houston it was. Or how we're associated with it.
• The primary goal of the houston spies is to destroy capitalism. While the spies' parent organisation has fingers in many pies, they have recognised blaseball as a potential medium for their revolutionary message, provided its latent capitalist tendencies can be snuffed out. The Spies point to the flagrant buying of votes as proof of capitalism's excesses. The Spies also believe that the exchange of peanuts for coins is unacceptable, and access to peanuts shouldn't be dependent on personal wealth.
• We built a very large amount of secret tunnels under Houston. We built an HQ down there, but the tunnel project spiralled out of control and now it's borderline impossible to actually get into the HQ. The operatives staffing the HQ assure us that they're doing fine, after a couple of years underground fungi started growing down there and they farm those for sustenance. Now we use a group chat to organise instead of meeting at HQ.
• Items on this list may be falsified for security concerns. We do this frequently in order to avoid any unfortunate situations in which capitalist forces may want to undermine us. Paradoxically, this item could also have been falsified.

Houston Spies/History

Not sure what y'all want to do but the historians discussed either keeping the history page a red link forever or doing a completely redacted page. Please do not panic if you think the page was just missed in oversight. Thanks! Nesblitt (talk) 04:10, 24 August 2020 (UTC)

Proposing a brief and contradictory "Origins" section

Origins

It is unclear why the Agency decided to register the Houston Spies as a Blaseball team, when visible famous athletes would compromise security.

Some theories include:

• The Agency just wanted an ordinary blaseball team, for perfectly normal reasons that have absolutely nothing to do with spywork at all.
• It was an accident; the Houston Spies were supposed to be registered as the Houston Spiders. By the time this error was discovered, the uniforms had already been made, the stadium had been built, and the marketing had already been started. So they decided to just go along with it.
• Ticket sales, licensing, and merchandise bring in a lot of money. This money is incredibly useful to fund operations.
• Blaseball players are afforded a great deal of access to areas and sources that would be extremely difficult to get into otherwise.
• It was a surprise birthday present to the Director.
• The Agency’s internal blaseball team had gotten tired of playing against themselves.
• The Spies are just distractions from the real agents.

If nobody objects to this I'll put it in tomorrow. Mainland309 (talk) 01:56, 18 November 2020 (UTC)