Sosa Hayes

Sosa Hayes
Basic Information
Team	Mexico City Wild Wings
Status	Alive, Intact, Singular

Sosa Hayes is a player for the Mexico City Wild Wings.

Controversies

The Wild Wings Legal Team have offered assurances that, contrary to rumor, Sosa Hayes is not three children on top of each other wearing a trench coat.

A spokesperson for the legal team was reported as saying: "He is a real normal person with arms and legs of standard proportions. Just look at how well the trench coat fits. He would never, for example, steal all three bases at once. Never."

When questioned upon this further, Wild Wings manager Guy Flieri presented a plate smeared with patented Kickin' Kajun sauce and dappled with ranch dressing. When the sauce leavings were consumed, the accusatory party reportedly felt a cold chill come over them before responding to questioners, "The matter is closed."