Sosa Hayes

From Blaseball Wiki

Sosa Hayes was a player in the Shadows for the Houston Spies, and was with the team from Season β23, Day 47 until Fall Ball. Hayes has played for the Mexico City Wild Wings, Miami Dale, and Atlantis Georgias.

Official League Records

Hayes joined the ILB as a lineup player for the Mexico City Wild Wings with the Return of Blaseball.

On Season β9, Day 7, Hayes was exchanged to the Houston Spies due to Feedback. Hayes was replaced by NaN. On Day 52 of the same season, Hayes became a pitcher due to Reverb.

During the Season β12 elections, all of Hayes's stats were increased as a result of the Infuse will.

During the Season β17 elections, Hayes retreated to the Spies' Shadows as a result of the Spies' Move will, resulting in a combined 16.8 17.5 stat increase.

During the Season β18 elections, Hayes rejoined the Spies' active roster in exchange for Yrjö Kerfuffle as a result of the Spies' Foreshadow will, becoming a lineup player in the process.

On Season β19, Day 2, Hayes was exchanged to the Atlantis Georgias due to Feedback. Hayes was replaced by Siobhan Chark.

On Season β22, Day 15, Hayes picked up The Fifth Base from the Atlantean Dome. Hayes then super roamed to the Miami Dale before placing The Fifth Base in the Atlantean Dome on Season 22, Day 20. During the Season β22 elections, Hayes was sent from the Dale's lineup to the Georgias' lineup as a result of the Georgias' Move will.

On Season β23, Day 47, Hayes was exchanged to the Houston Spies due to Feedback. Hayes was replaced by Siobhan Chark.

On Season β24, Day 75, Hayes retreated to the Spies' Shadows in exchange for Eduardo Perez due to Night.

The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.



The Wild Wings Legal Team have offered assurances that, contrary to rumor, Sosa Hayes is not three children on top of each other wearing a trench coat.

A spokesperson for the legal team was reported as saying: "He is a real normal person with arms and legs of standard proportions. Just look at how well the trench coat fits. He would never, for example, steal all three bases at once. Never."

When questioned upon this further, Wild Wings manager Guy Flieri presented a plate smeared with patented Kickin' Kajun sauce and dappled with ranch dressing. When the sauce leavings were consumed, the accusatory party reportedly felt a cold chill come over them before responding to questioners, "The matter is closed."

Joining the Spies

Sosa Hayes’ arrival in Houston harkens back to his Feedback swap with NaN. While unexpected, he was welcomed by the Spies and began his career as a fantastic batter. His new teammates were already familiar with the idea of playing alongside a regular human man, and they were immediately insistent that Sosa Hayes is not three kids in a trench coat. A number of unattributed broadcasts and reports have doubled down on this claim: Sosa Hayes is a normal Blaseball player, not three kids.

Hayes’ career as a batter ended due to Reverb in Season 9. He was able to adapt to his new pitching position with help from Math Velazquez, with the latter agent offering pointers and advice on how to play above his stars. Interestingly, Hayes has developed a number of his own strategies. His pitching has a record of being unpredictable- fans have noticed how the ball seems to be thrown from different heights, or that the throws can be grouped into three distinct styles.

New Friends

Between shifting positions on the Spies and learning how to pitch, Hayes quickly befriended Son Scotch. The two spent plenty of time with each other, often being seen playing video games together, sharing Scotch’s comic book collection, and hanging out during debriefings.

Hayes has also forged a friendship with Comfort Septemberish. The two bonded over a shared love for cursed food, both discussing plans for their next recipes and leaving kitchens in disarray afterwards. Neither player keeps it a secret. Naturally, this has drawn the horrified attention of Malik Romayne. This horror has since developed into a friendly rivalry over food.

Tragedy Strikes

The incineration of Son Scotch was felt by all of Houston; the Spies were left processing the loss of their son, and Hayes was faced with the death of his closest friend. His posture underneath the trench coat became more disorganised- as if a tower was struggling to balance its own weight.

Post-incineration, Hayes was rarely seen playing the games he used to have fun with.  When he did decide to spend a short while playing whatever save file he opened, he left a second controller beside him. Hayes has also taken charge of his friend’s comic book collection and maintains it as a memorial.

In order to give Hayes time to recover, the Spies elected to shadow him for a season, and then bring him back as a batter during the following election. It was all according to Plan.

On Day 2 of Season 19, Hayes was the target of a Feedback swap, landing him amongst the Atlantis Georigas.

Return to Houston

It can be said that the many swaps were also part of the plan to return Hayes as a stronger batter.

During Season 23, Siobhan Chark made use of the Spies’ voicemail to swap places with Reese Clark. The move itself was confusing until Chark was up to bat in Feedback weather the very next day, switching teams with Hayes and finally returning him to the Spies, an exact reflection of the Feedback swap that sent him to Atlantis in the first place.

Hayes used the rest of the season to catch up with his old team. Hayes was overjoyed to see Septemberish again, and has recently begun making friends with some of the team’s younger agents, such as the ever-dramatic Chet Takahashi.

Fans and new teammates have noticed that Hayes looked significantly taller upon his return. The Spies now dismiss claims of Sosa being four teenagers sharing a trench coat, and insist that everyone gets taller over time.

Return to the Shadows

Hayes made use of the new Night weather when it fell across REDACTED in season 24. He left for the Shadows quietly, switching places with Eduardo Perez as he did. The motivations behind his most recent Shadowing are entirely unknown even to the Spies themselves.

The only information the Spies have on Sosa's whereabouts is a note left in Sosa's handwriting: "I need some space, so I can think about something other than our impending doom."

Fan Works