Difference between revisions of "San Franstadium"
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=== Neo-Disco Club === | === Neo-Disco Club === | ||
| − | * Team captain Urlacher hosts "Karaoke Knight" every Friday. They reliably close the evening with a spirited rendition of "My Girlfriend's Girlfriend's Swordblat" accompanied by the PolyHedron's ballpark organ. | + | * Team captain Urlacher hosts "Karaoke Knight" every Friday. They reliably close the evening with a spirited rendition of "My Girlfriend's Girlfriend's Swordblat" accompanied by the PolyHedron's ballpark organ. |
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| + | === Infield === | ||
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| + | * The dirt infield of the PolyHedron is heart-shaped. This is against standard Blaseball regulations, and despite previous attempts to amend the aberration, the dirt stubbornly would not yield into any other landscape, presumably because of the Power of Love. Eventually an exception was been made for the Lovers' anomalous home field because it's "just too damn cute." Unaccustomed fielders will occasionally trip on the grass line due to its unorthodox perimeter. | ||
== References == | == References == | ||
Revision as of 16:31, 10 August 2020
The PolyHedron is the home stadium for The San Francisco Lovers. While this might be its most famed function, it is primarily a community center and garden to help support community members and educate them on their new independent San Francisco. It also has a poppin' Neo Disco Club suspended over the field.
Location & History
The PolyHedron is located at the geographical center of the Romantic Collaborative of San Francisco. This is a direct result of the PolyHedron actually being Theo King and Knight Urlacher's old apartment building, transformed when the Lovers came under new sponsorship. Prior to this, the site of all the Lovers' games and practices was actually just the parking lot of a nearby abandoned ████[1] with a poorly-drawn[2] chalk shape in it, slightly resembling a Blaseball quadrilateral from a distance.
Upon Theo King's abdication of the throne and the formation of the Collaborative, he initially only claimed his apartment as sovereign territory. Knight Urlacher had to convince King to extend his claim, stating "I don't want to have to cross customs two ways to pick up Subway, bro." In the face of this indisputable reasoning, the Romantic Collaborative expanded to include all the area within a 20-block radius. None of the inhabitants of these city blocks seemed to mind the sudden political shift, with most people questioned on the matter saying, "Oh, wait, you're telling me the Big O owns this block now? Nice, good for him. He needs a win."
Notably, no one actually observed the creation of the PolyHedron. Everyone living in the Collaborative was invited for a Chill Hang Sesh (CHS) at King's place to celebrate the arrival of Percival Wheeler directly into Knight's bowl of oatmeal. As happens with every CHS, King passed an unbelievably shitty[2] organic, self-made strain of psychedelic mushroom around, and everyone got insanely high for the next 48 hours. The partygoers came down, the new PolyHedron had consumed half of the entire Collaborative, and business cards that said "Thank you for choosing The Feeling of Seeing Your Partner Again After Having Not Seen Them For a While!" littered the floor.
Significant Features
- Mondays are complimentary days and so donations are discouraged.
- Upon entering the arena, ushers will hand you a card with a personalized compliment. This was a stipulation in the Lovers' contract[3] with The Feeling.
- While the PolyHedron can be entered on foot, the complicated network of fiefdoms, baronies, burbclaves, desiccated startups, and nomadic war machines which make up the Bay Area Demilitarized Zone can render such approach risky. Favored methods of entry include walking through Eclipse in the bombed-out remains of the Hyatt Regency (a good choice for locals) or simply stacking up some beanbags and crawling through while intoning "take me out to the ballgame", whereupon one will emerge in the PolyHedron's stands.
Residential Areas
- Part hostel, part VIP box, part reentry project, all home: the residential areas of the PolyHedron are a motley assortment of repurposed apartments, shipping containers, and a least two moored dirigibles from the Venture Capital Wars. The residents have bulwarked this quilted assemblage with microgrids, floating wind turbines, and an incomprehensible profusion of hammocks, bean bags, and those injection molded plastic chairs that unaccountably appear at church picnics.
Communal Garden
- As befits a collaborative powered by human optimism, love, and demons, the PolyHedron features extensive greenscaping and agroponic systems throughout. Produce found therein is by and large organic, nutritious, colorful, and often incredibly psychotropic. Farmer's Markets take place along the border with the Mission Remnants twice a month.
Blaseball Arena
- Unusually for a blaseball arena, the bleachers have no regulation seating. Instead the PolyHedron is surrounded by tiered beanbag seating. It's pretty chill.
Neo-Disco Club
- Team captain Urlacher hosts "Karaoke Knight" every Friday. They reliably close the evening with a spirited rendition of "My Girlfriend's Girlfriend's Swordblat" accompanied by the PolyHedron's ballpark organ.
Infield
- The dirt infield of the PolyHedron is heart-shaped. This is against standard Blaseball regulations, and despite previous attempts to amend the aberration, the dirt stubbornly would not yield into any other landscape, presumably because of the Power of Love. Eventually an exception was been made for the Lovers' anomalous home field because it's "just too damn cute." Unaccustomed fielders will occasionally trip on the grass line due to its unorthodox perimeter.
References
- ↑ All historians have been able to recover from the sprawling complex are trays of ancient meatballs that appear to still be fit for consumption; packages of DIY wooden furniture; and several giant blue plastic letters K, A, I, and E littered across the property. They suspect that these letters, when assembled in the correct order and uttered aloud, will summon the end of Blaseball forever.
- ↑ 2.0 2.1 King tried his best, alright? Don't hate.
- ↑ No one actually read the contract before they signed it. It was used as rolling paper for the next CHS.
