Randall Marijuana's Cat/C-Vincent the Unknowable

Vincent the Unknowable

Vincent the Unknowable appears to be a large, colorful, two-dimensional tiger that prowls around the house of Randall Marijuana, and good-naturedly allows itself to be referred to as Randall Marijuana's cat. Randall Marijuana claims that Vincent appeared one day as he was watching tv, and lept out of the screen as an advertisement for Hades Tigers branded Cereal was playing. When asked to confirm or deny the story, Vincent replied, "well, if I told you, I wouldn't be very unknowable, would I? Now, now, don't look so cross. I'll let you believe whatever you like. I'm not a fan of the cereal, though. Didn't have very many marshmallows, it's no wonder why it was discontinued."

Controversy

The existence of Vincent the Unknowable is hotly debated among other residents of the Hellmouth, many of whom claim that Vincent is not in fact a living two-dimensional tiger, but merely a large picture of a tiger that Randall, in a drug-addled state, frequently confuses for an actual cat. A few households nearby the home of Randall use Vincent as a sort of "boogeyman" to frighten their children into good behavior. When asked about the nature of it's existence, Vincent was quoted as saying, "Why should that bother me? If I didn't believe in you, would you fail to exist? Or if I did believe, would it make you more real than you already are?" Everything is exactly as it should be, and nothing you say or do, nothing anyone says or does, can change that." Vincent was then reported as licking it's paw and grooming it's own ears. When pressed for further comment, Vincent was said to "glance at us, flick it's tail irritably, and continue to talk about cereal for an uninterrupted four and a half hours."