Baldwin Breadwinner
Baldwin Breadwinner is a lineup player for the Unlimited Tacos. Breadwinner has been a member of the team since Season 1.
Official League Records
After the Season 3 elections, Breadwinner was briefly known as Wyatt Mason due to The Wyatt Masoning.
Life Before Blaseball
COMMUNITY REPORTSThe remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.
Baldwin Breadwinner's life history is surprisingly shrouded in mystery. He has no known living or unliving relatives, and despite him having had a legal name change,[1] all documents concerning his past had been mysteriously wisped into the air, floating along the harsh breeze until they met the document-destroying jaws of a nearby incinerator. When asked about this in various interviews, Breadwinner responded vaguely, saying that
"Yeah, I tried to make a pact with the Dark God Beelzeblase in order to give up half my life in order to completely erase my past, among other things. I'm not really sure if it went through, since the summoning was pretty sloppy, and I didn't see anything or anyone when I started dripping my blood in, but a day later, all of my 'The Game of Life' boards that were sitting in my closet had been cut in half. So, you know. Maybe that worked, but the Dark God probably misunderstood the deal."
When pressed on his name before his legal change, Breadwinner was recorded as speaking it, but the interviewing correspondent suddenly became deaf, her vision became completely red, and she vomited out an unknown, jet black substance that melted through the floor. The recording glitches around the moment he says his name. Breadwinner, soon after, responds with "Hey! Thanks for the assist, bro," and the correspondent recovered from their demonic episode a few hours later.
Other interviewers attempted to follow up on details concerning his deals with the Dark God Beelzeblase, but he wasn't really too sure what worked and what didn't himself. "I tried to make a deal with him to make me an ungodly powerful Blaseball player," he states. He continues, saying "But he said 'man, no, that sounds boring as hell. why don't you just get good', so I did that instead." Various other attempted deals with the devil were largely frivolous.
Bread Winning Controversy
Baldwin Breadwinner is known for only ever eating meals that include bread in them. Whether this means common foods such as toast and sandwiches, or less common bread-based meals such as breadcrumb-covered meatballs and bruschetta, he sticks to this diet very strictly. As a result of this, he's had to clash against his own team management, as he would often be forced to hold, or even eat a taco for promotional material. Eventually, he got his wish, and ever since, he's usually been seen in those promotional materials with a lone Subway sandwich as everyone else enjoys their taco.
Some members of the team have attempted to get him to try a taco by encasing the taco materials within bread, or sprinkling breadcrumbs on the taco. Breadwinner's statement on the subject is that doing so sort of defeats the point of a taco. People eventually decided to stop questioning this.
More Bread
Within the Unlimited Los Angeli, wherein time and space are suggestion, not law, Baldwin Breadwinner was surprised and excited to find that all of his bats have been replaced by stale baguettes.
Feedback to the Fridays
On Day 82 of season 4, Fletcher Yamamoto baked a particularly transcendent loaf of bread during his pre-game ritual and had it on display at the Friday's third base snack cart. Those by the cart report that they heard Breadwinner say between mouthfuls of bread, "I wish this loaf lasted forever." Our Lady of Perpetual Friday obliged.
- ↑ This does not refer to The Wyatt Masoning.
