Atlas Jonbois
Atlas Jonbois was a player for the Charleston Shoe Thieves.
Not much is known about the roadmaps that make up the entirety of Jonbois' body, but they appear to navigate exclusively to Sunken Charleston.
Atlas Jonbois was formerly a tram operator, introduced to the splort of blaseball when they were wrangled into posing as Charleston Shoe Thieves pitcher Cornelius Games during the Season 2 Finals. While their performance as a pitcher was abysmal, they absently tried hitting a few balls for practice after the game and were discovered to be a somewhat competent hitter by the team, putting them in position to be recruited as a replacement hitter following the Incineration of Sebastian Townsend
When asked about their hopes for new player Atlas Jonbois, the entirety of the Charleston Shoe Thieves responded in deafening unison, "Atlas is big and strong and is my friend."
Everyone is fairly sure that Jonbois would have specialized in stealing ballet shoes, but they never got the chance to officially steal shoes for the team.
Jonbois was incinerated Season 3, Day 43. They were replaced by Sebastian Woodman. At four games played and three games started, Jonbois is believed to have had the shortest career in ILB history.
In Literature
Following Jonbois' incineration, team eulogist Ham Ham composed "The Ballad of Atlas Jonbois" in their honor:
Well, let me tell you of the story of a map named Atlas
A hitter we barely knew
They kissed the trams farewell, and entered Choux Stadium
To cheer for the Thievin' Shoe
[Chorus] Well, did they ever return?
No they never returned, and their fate is still unlearned
They may ride forever in Sunken Charleston
They’re the map who never returned
Atlas took a wrong turn into the players’ dugout
And Cornelius needed relief
Their pitching career was not fated to prosper
But Atlas became a Shoe Thief
[Chorus]
After three short games as a Shoe Thieves slugger
We said “you’re big and strong, my friend!”
But when a rogue umpire lit those maps on fire
Atlas saw their lifetime end
[Chorus]
Now all night long Atlas rides through Sunken Charleston
On a spectral tram they navigate
But their heart is full of blaseball dreams and stolen kicks
Atlas Jonbois will never bow to fate
Well, did they ever return?
No they never returned, and their fate is still unlearned
They may ride forever in Sunken Charleston
They’re the map who never returned